Please Don't Leave Me
by TheGoldenPrince
Summary: A little GamTav fluff I wrote out of boredom. Contains one rated M scene with a warning on it.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello everyone! So, I was bored and searched for GamTac fluff on fanfiction, but didn't find any. So I figured why not, I'll just write some myself! And this is the result.**

**Because it was against the rules of fanfiction I had to take down the original and re-write it in first person view. It might sound a little strange now, but I tried my best to make it atleast readable. Also, I got rid of all of the stupid typos and had maybe a bit too much fun with changing the POV.**

I am Tavros Nitram. Right now I am shuffling through the channels on my TV with my friend and roommates head on my laps. He sort of seems to be asleep, though I don't really mind. He's a bit odd and this sort of stuff is usual for him. I've seen him do this with many of his other friends too.

There isn't anything on the TV though, so I decide to just watch some cartoons. This is sort of irritating, but I don't really have anything against cartoons. They're really funny sometimes.

Gamzee moves a bit and I look down. He has his eyes open and he's just staring at me, smiling a lazy smile. I brush a loose strand of black hair off of his face and smile too.

"Would you, uh, mind getting some drinks, from the fridge?" I ask shyly. I would go myself if it weren't for the paralyzed state of my legs. I could barely feel the tops of my thighs.

"Sure thing bro", he says smiling and gets up. I turn my gaze back to the TV, where Spongebob is just starting. I hear him open the fridge and take out some drinks, probably Faygo though I hope against it. Then the fridge is closed again and he's coming back.

I look away from the TV and accept the glass of not Faygo, but orange juice.

"Thanks", I say smiling shyly and a lazy grin creeps up to his face.

"So, what we watching?" he asks sitting down next to me and sipping his own drink, which I assume is actually Faygo. For some reason Gamzee seems to love that stuff. Way too much if you ask me.

"Cartoons. But we can watch something else, if you want to", I say putting the remote down.

"Cartoons are fine by me", he says and the two of us watch the TV for a while. I glance at the clock at some point to find it is almost 8 o'clock.

"Oh! I have to get my homework done!" I exclaim and a bit clumsily get into my wheelchair. Gamzee looks at me a bit puzzled. "It's Sunday. I've got school tomorrow."

"Oh, right, almost forgot", Gamzee says, smiling once more. He had already got through school (how he had done that is beyond me) and worked currently at a coffee shop. I visited him regularly so he wouldn't be too lonely. Somehow I doubt he could even be lonely with all the miracles to keep him company.

I quickly wheel into our shared room and dig out my homework and pencil from my bag. I concentrate on my work and don't notice Gamzee, who walks in and lays on his bed.

After almost an hour of hard work I stuff my answers back into my bag and almost fall off my wheelchair after noticing Gamzee, who's just staring at me.

"Sorry dude, didn't mean to all up and scare you like that", he says, sitting up on the edge of his bed. I just shake my head quickly.

"N-no, it's okay. I'm fine", I mutter collecting myself. After a few seconds I smile at him.

"I'll just, uh, grab something to eat", I say and look at Gamzee. "Are you, uh, going to eat at all?"

"Sure thing", Gamzee answers and gets up. Before I know it he's pushing me to the kitchen.

"I, uh, could have gone there myself. You didn't have to push me", I mumble and feel my face growing red.

"Nah, it's cool. Helping a bro out", Gamzee says refusing to let go. In the kitchen he makes me some food and gets something for himself. You think I should have gotten used to this. We had been roommates for almost a year and friends for almost two. He'd always been pushing me around, but I still got uncomfortable with it at times.

The food was eaten in silence and at nine thirty I go back to my room, leaving him to watch his weird shows. I open my laptop and check who's online. No one I really wanted to talk to at the moment.

Oh, someone is pestering me.

terminallyCapricious [TC] began pestering adiosToreador [AD]

TC: hEy MoThErFuCkInG bEsT bRo :o)

AT: uHH, I KNOW i'M IN THE NEXT ROOM, rIGHT?

TC: sUrE dO mOthErFuCkEr

TC: aNd It'S lOnElY aS fUcK hErE

TC: mAyBe I sHoUlD cOmE hErE iF I AiN't ToO bUsY ;o)

AT: uHH, sURE,

AT: i'LL COME, iF I WANT TO

TC: sOuNdS gReAt

terminallyCapricious [TC] ceased pestering adiosToreador [AD]

I sigh and close my laptop before heading back to the living room. I see Gamzee sitting on the sofa, watching something on the TV. I wheel up to the sofa and push myself on it, sitting next to him.

He doesn't say anything, just smiles and I glance at the show. It seems very boring, but I don't want to say anything, so I just keep watching it.

At some point I notice Gamzee has moved closer to me. Just a bit. He also has his arm on the back of the couch, behind me. I feel sort of sleepy and decide to close my eyes for a while. I unconsciously lean against Gamzee and fall asleep on the sofa next to him.


	2. Chapter 2

**So here's the second chapter. I'll try editing a few more tomorrow, because I'll not be able to come on my computer for a week.**

**And to those old readers, who might come read this again, you might guess that the sequel will be shortly delayed. I'm so sorry! But hopefully you'll have the patiens to wait a while, as I will try to re-upload all these as fast as I can. And write something along the way.**

**Reviews are always welcome and I'd like to know if there's something I could improve on!**

My name is Gamzee Makara and holy shit that was a weird dream. I open my eyes and sleepily look around.

I'm sitting on the couch, where I fell asleep after my friend. The TV is turned off and Tavros isn't anywhere to be seen. I frown a little, getting up and walking to the kitchen. A glance at the clock tells me Tavros would have already left and a note on the refrigerator door confirms this.

Another boring day to come, since I don't have work today. I sigh and make breakfast to take to my room, where I plop down on the chair before my computer, which I turn on and start eating while I wait for it to actually do what I told it to.

After a few minutes I get to log into Pesterchum. Nobody of interest there, really, so I just start surfing the internet, maybe to see if I could find some cool new ideas for raps or something.

I quickly finish my breakfast and leave the plate where it is, continuing with my mindless browsing. After a bit, though, I am interrupted by one of my friends. Or should I in this case say furrends? I don't know, but decide to see what she might be pestering me about.

arsenicCatnip [AC] began pestering terminallyCapricious [TC]

AC: :33 * AC stalks her furrend from the shadows and tacklehugs him furrom behind! *

TC: hEy NePeTa

TC: hOnK :o)

AC: :33 * AC curls up in her furrends lap and looks up at said furrend. *

AC: :33 Had any luck yet? * she asks *

TC: wItH wHaT nOw?

AC: :33 With our beloved furrend Tavros of course! * she exclaims tail twitching in excitement *

TC: wHaT dO I MeAn?

AC: :33 * AC looks at her clown furrend in disbelief * Have I forgotten about our last chat already? * she asks *

TC: wAnT tO hElP mE rEmEmBeR?

AC: :33 Oh, furrget the roleplaying furr a second.

AC: :33 Our last chat. About you and Tavros!

TC: oH. yEaH.

TC: nOw I rEmEmBeR.

TC: nOtHiNg To RePoRt On.

AC: :33 You haven't said anything to him, have you?

TC: nO, aNd Im SuRe He DoEsNt FeEl ThE sAmE.

AC: :33 Are you pawsitive?

TC: vErY pAwSiTiVe.

AC: :33 Oh but I would be purrfect for each other! I just know it!

TC: i StIlL dOnT tHiNk I sHoUlD dO iT yEt...

AC: :33 Oh fine. Have it My way Mr. Grumpypants! I sound like Karkitty!

AC: :33 Shoot! My teacher just came. Talk to you later!

arsenicCatnip [AC] ceased pestering terminallyCapricious [TC]

I look at the screen for a while before closing the log.

Yes, I had a crush on my roommate and best bro. Had had it for what, two years now? Probably something along the lines. I never told anyone, though. Only Karkat and Nepeta. Well, Nepeta figured it out, actually. Besides, she loves pairing people up. It always amazes me how accurately she can pair people and their relationships.

But for now I push the conversation out of my head and scroll quickly through the rest of the people on. Pretty much everyone is at school or work. I've always wondered why I had Mondays off. Probably my boss was just messing with me.

I see Sollux is on. For a fact, I know he works at the library and another fact, he has work today. Those are the best two reasons for pestering him.

terminallyCapricious [TC] began pestering twinArmageddons [TA]

TC: yOu On OnE oF tHe CoMpUtErS oR yOuR pHoNe ThIs TiMe?

TA: the computer2 two rii2ky.

TC: hOnK :o)

TA: 2hut up.

TA: what do you want anyway2?

TC: nOtHiNg ReAlLy.

TC: bOrEd OuT oF my mInD wHeN AlL tHe MoThErFuCkErS aRe At ScHoOl.

TA: why don't you ju2t come here iin2tead of pe2teriing me.

TA: ii'll get iin trouble iif ii'm caught.

TC: sUrE tHiNg BrOtHeR :o)

TC: hOnK hOnK

TA: I do know I creep me out 2ometiime2?

TC: tHaTs JuSt MeAn :o(

TA: …

TA: ju2t get your lazy clown a22 here already.

TC: hOnK ;o)

terminallyCapricious [TC] began pestering twinArmageddons [TA]

I log out of Pesterchum and close my computer. I grab my phone from somewhere on the desk and retrieve my money from the kitchen. After that I quickly pull on my Converse and a dark violet hoodie before heading to the library.

After entering the library I look around for my lisping bro. He's not at the counter, so I might as well wait there for a while. I jump onto the counter, even though I know they don't like it, and cross my feet, waiting for Sollux to show up.

The woman at the counter looks at I briefly before getting up and going to look for Sollux. I visit often on Mondays, they know it. Why don't they just stick Sollux at the counter for Mondays?

"Gamth, pleathe get off the counter", I hear Sollux's voice before seeing him.

"Why? It's motherfucking comfy here", I say smiling and turn around to see my friend.

"It'th rude", he says blankly and I hop off the counter. "Come on, I have work to do."

I follow Sollux into the library as he puts away books and organizes them. I talk about pretty much anything coming to my mind, while Sollux simply listens.

"Gamth, you're talking about Tav again", he points out and I'm happy to have my make-up on to hide my blush.

"Got a problem with it?" I ask smiling lazily.

"Yeth, actually. I have one quethtion for you", he says turning to face me. He's shorter than me, the top of his head barely reaching my eyes. "Do you like him or thomething?"

I freeze. I stare into Sollux's strange glasses without knowing what to say. I open my mouth just to close it again with nothing to say. He just keeps staring at me, which makes me a bit uncomfortable. Slightly uncertainly I nod my head, before looking away.

"I knew it. I jutht knew it", he says and I look back to see him grinning. "I know, I think Nepeta ith right in thith one. Have you theen her notebook? It mutht be half full of you and him! I jutht wouldn't have thought it'th true. But who am I to doubt her? But theriouthly, I think you might have competition."

I tuned him out at some point, falling into my own world. The last sentence brings me back to this world so suddenly that I almost trip on my own feet, stumbling a little and feel Sollux catching me before I fall. Or more like supporting me.

"I have what?" I ask surprised.

"I jutht thaid you might want to do thomething, thince thomeone elthe theemth to have hith eyeth on your cruth", he says looking at me a bit worried.

"What? Who?" I ask collecting myself and looking at him unusually sharply.

"Well, have you ever theen Dave with Tav?" he asks and I shake my head. "He'th been flirting with Tav for thome time now."

I know without seeing that my expression is telling everything.

"Strider? Strider has his eyes on my Tav?" I sputter out and Sollux nods.

"Thorry Gamth, I gotta go. Later", he says and walks off, leaving me to stand alone in the middle of the library.


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay, so here's the third chapter. Took me too long to edit :I**

**Oh well.**

**Oh, and before I forget. This story will be full of all sorts of pairings I like. That means that there might be even the weirder ships in there. The GamTav part will come eventually, don't worry.**

My name is Tavros and-

Not this again. I don't want this. Let's try this again.

I play with my food as I sit with my friends in the cafeteria. Rose is sitting next to me and talking quickly to Nepeta. They probably were arguing about something. That's what they always did.

I snap back to reality when I feel a hand go through my hair and watch as Dave sits in front of me.

"What were you thinking 'bout?" he asks looking at me with the slightest bit of curiosity visible.

"Uhh, nothing really", I say smiling a bit and take a bite of my food. I'm really not that hungry at the moment.

"You're gonna starve if you don't ever eat anything", he points out taking a big bite out of his food.

"Don't worry. I, uhh, eat at home. Gamzee, uhh, makes good food", I say and notice him tense a bit before relaxing again.

"Almost forgot you live with that juggalo", he says as cool as ever. I frown a bit and this doesn't go unnoticed for him. "What?"

"Nothing", I say quietly and continue picking at my food. He starts a chat with Nepeta and I feel a little left out.

"So, I'm having this party on Saturday for my friend John. He and his family are moving here soon and I thought they need a good welcome to the neighborhood", he says poking me on the forehead to get my attention.

"You're all invited", he says. "You'll come, right?"

"Uhh, sure", I say nodding slightly and he smirks.

"Great! See you all later", he says, ruffling my Mohawk once more before leaving with his tray.

I look after him for a while before leaving myself and heading for my next period. I silently wonder if Gamzee was invited too. Might as well ask Dave when I see him next.

The day passes quickly, but I see no sign of Dave. I just barely notice him after the last bell rings.

"Dave!" I catch up with him and he turns to look at me one brow cocked up.

"What now?" he asks leaning against the wall.

"Oh, I, uhh, was going to ask if you, uhh, will send a more accurate invitation. Or something", I stammer looking at the ground.

"Sure, sounds good", he replies and I look up, smiling a bit. He smirks a bit and ruffles My Mohawk again. "See ya later."

I watch him leave and quickly wheel out of the building. I need to catch the bus or it would be a long trip back to my apartment.

I take the elevator to the third floor. I'd prefer our apartment to be a bit lower, maybe on the first floor even, but at least there is an elevator. I don't really know how it would work out without one. Or if it broke for that matter.

After tossing the keys on the kitchen table I head to my room to start on my homework. Gamzee doesn't seem to be here. He's probably somewhere, maybe at the library with Sollux or somewhere watching all his miracles. I take a little over an hour doing my homework and notice how hungry I really am.

Wheeling to the kitchen I grab a sandwich and go to the living room to eat. Cooking isn't really my thing. I flip the TV on and start surfing the channels, looking for something interesting to watch.

I watch TV for the better part of an hour before I hear the door open and close.

"Is that you, Gamzee?" I ask turning to look at the door, which I could see from the living room.

"Sure thing, motherfucker", he greets me, smiling his usual dopy grin. "Eaten anything yet?"

"A sandwich", I answer and he briefly visits the living room to take my plate away.

"I'm gonna fix us a dinner. You'll starve if you don't start eatin' well", he says sarcastically and I hear as he starts to take out ingredients. I'm oddly reminded of Dave. He said the same thing today.

"Dave told me that already", I say and regret it instantly. I can't see into the kitchen but I just know Gamzee froze. I can't hear anything, at least.

"Oh motherfuck!" he yells and I hear glass shattering.

"Gamzee! Are I all right?" I ask worriedly, a little shocked. It would take far too long to get into my wheelchair and I probably would just be in the way in the kitchen, so I just turn around to see the doorway.

"Nah, I'm fine. Don't worry your head about it. Just up and dropped a plate is all", I hear him answer and he continues making food. I wonder what could have made him drop the plate. He usually wasn't that careless.

Still pondering this I don't actually notice him before he sits down next to me on the couch and hands I a plate of noodles.

"Thanks", I say absent-mindedly and he looks at me with a weird expression.

"Something bothering you?" he asks but before I have a chance to say no both our phones beep a message and I dig my phone out of my pocket.

"Dave's throwing a party to welcome John", Gamzee says, confirming my suspicions. I had also received the invitation.

"I'd like to go. Do you, uhh, think you could also come?" I ask smiling a bit.

"Of course! Wanna welcome a new motherfucker to town", he says grinning a bit and I smile. At least something is working, if not my brain. Gamzee's acting normal again.

We eat our food talking about the day and watching the TV, occasionally commenting about the stupid shows that made no sense. I'm laughing and smiling more than usual and I like it. It's nice to be around Gamzee. He leaves for a while to go talk to Karkat on the phone. I hear him talking, but don't want to be rude by listening, so I turn the TV up a bit.

I almost fall off the couch in surprise when I hear Gamzee yelling.

"What do you mean with that? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN? No, you can't be serious!"

Then he continues with a lower tone, and I can't hear him clearly anymore. My heart is racing and I try to calm myself down. Why would I be this afraid? What of?

"FUCK YOU! MOTHER OF FUCK! SHUT UP!"

This time I actually fall off the couch and yelp in surprise. I hear as something collides with the wall, apparently Gamzee's phone. I sit there for a second, not sure what to do and rub my arm, which I had hit on the table while falling.

Soon enough Gamzee comes to the living room and looks at me puzzled.

"What are you all up and doing on the floor?" he asks. He doesn't seem to understand.

"Oh, umm, you sort of, scared me. With the yelling", I say shyly blushing a bit.

"Oh shit, sorry bro", he says instantly helping me back on the couch. "Didn't mean to all up and scare you like that."

"No, it's okay", I say smiling a bit. "What got you so mad?"

Gamzee visibly tenses at my question before looking to the ground.

"Karkat just said something. I don't really feel like talking about it", he answers, uncharastically quietly. I just nod my head in response and look back to the TV.

My attention is quickly drawn back to Gamzee as he settles his head on my lap, feet hanging off the armrest of the couch. He closes his eyes and falls asleep quickly, which gives me no possible way of escaping.

A glance at the clock and I know I have time before I actually need to go to sleep. It's only nine p.m. I just decide to keep watching TV and spend the rest of the evening doing that with Gamzee asleep on my lap. At eleven I carefully lift his head off my lap and get into my wheelchair. I don't really know how I managed it without waking him up, but I'll take it. I head off to our room and go to sleep in my bed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Fourth chapter right here! Probably gonna get two more up today, if I'm lucky. And then there will be a week with no updates. Oh no!**

**I hate all the delays as much as you do, trust me. And I hope all the old readers don't hate me for that ;_;**

The ringtone on my phone goes off and I fall off the couch, hitting my head on the floor.

Groaning quietly I sit up and grab my phone, turning the alarm off. Well, at least I'm awake. Wait. What am I doing in the living room? After a bit of thinking I remember my little talk with Karkat and falling asleep on Tavros's lap. I facepalm and make a mental note to never do something like that again.

I get up and go to the kitchen, grabbing a sandwich and a bottle of Faygo. I had around an hour or so to get to work today. I really hated these early mornings.

Quietly I sneak into my room and grab some clean clothes. I quickly strip out of yesterday's clothes and pull on my baggy gray pants. Next I get a little too big T-shirt on and head out of the bedroom without waking Tavros, who I notice is in his own bed. Lucky him, getting to sleep long. But didn't I go to sleep early yesterday? Yeah, that's probably why I wasn't feeling too tired right now.

I grab my keys stuffing them into the pockets of my pants and make sure I have my phone with me. Quickly finishing my sandwich I pull my Converse on and take my Faygo with me as I start walking towards Karkat's apartment.

It's not a long walk and I'm soon at his door. Digging out my keys I search for the one to his house and enter, closing the door behind me. I walk to his room and find him sitting there on his bed. He looked like he hadn't slept the whole night.

"What kept a motherfucker up the whole night?" I ask sitting down on the side of his bed.

He stays quiet and I wait if he's gonna respond. Just when I'm about to ask if he's okay he looks at me and I close my mouth. For a second we stare at each other and then he crawls up to me, burying his face into my chest. I just hold him for a second while he shakes.

"Sorry Gamzee", he says in a hoarse voice.

"For what exactly?" I ask smiling a bit as he looks up at me with his brown, almost red, eyes.

"For getting I to yell, I dumbfuck", he says frowning a bit and I smile.

"No problem. You up and ready to get to the coffee shop?" I ask standing up. "'Cause I need to get there soon."

"Sure", he mumbles and goes to get what he needs, which I suppose are his school stuff since he has school today, as does Tavros.

I walk with Karkat to the shop I work at, like I usually do. This isn't anything new to him. He sits down in his favorite spot as I go and make his coffee, getting one for myself too. There isn't really anyone else there yet, not counting in the owner, Kanaya, so I might as well drink the awful coffee to get myself properly started. Usually I wouldn't drink this stuff. Faygo is much better. But this wakes me up somewhat.

I put Karkat's drink down and sit across from him. The silence falls between us while we drink our coffees. I simply fall into my own little world, thinking about Tavros. Would Dave really try to hit on him? Would Tavros understand? Would he really go out with Dave?

After emptying my cup I wait for Karkat to drink his. I take the two cups back behind the counter, say good bye to my best friend and take the order from another customer.

The days go by relatively quickly and soon it's Friday evening. I have figured that Karkat, Feferi, Eridan, Sollux, Rose, Kanaya, Vriska and many of my friends had got Dave's invitation. The party seemed to be more than just a welcoming party for John and Jade. I try not to think about it too much, since it always gets my mood down a bit.

Tavros has become pretty excited about the party, and even Karkat has shown slight interest in seeing the new kids. I like the idea of new friends, but Strider's party isn't really too inviting. I'm mainly going to keep my eyes on Tavros. And I sort of feel like a creep for that. Like Tavros even belonged to me, which he of course didn't.

Wait... What am I even thinking? I blink a few times to get back to reality. I've been sitting on the couch for God knows how long. And I definitely don't want to waste the whole day here.

I get up and stretch a bit, walking to the bathroom. I wash my face with cold water and look at my reflection. First thing I notice is the scars. I really don't like remembering about them. I got them in a fight in front of some club. Someone had attacked me and Tavros on a walk. He had come at me with something very sharp and quickly had three cuts across my face, from above my left eye to under my right one. I remember hitting him hard against a wall and I actually almost killed him with that one hit. Nothing was charged at me, since it was put as self-defense, but the incident was awful to remember.

I applied a fresh layer of make-up on the older one. A clown make-up I had grown to like, not just because it hid my scars, but I really liked it somehow. Only bad thing about it was that people kept calling me a juggalo, which wasn't too nice, since I was definitely not one of them.

Oh for Heaven's sake, I'm drifting off again. I get out of the bathroom and go to my room. I turn my computer on and sit back in my chair while waiting for it to power up. I'm logged into Pesterchum at top speed and after checking the list of people I choose to pester Karkat.

terminallyCapricious [TC] began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]

TC: hOw YoU dOiNg MoThErFuCkInG bEsT fRiEnD?

CG: FUCKING *MIRACULOUS*.

TC: hOnK :o)

CG: UGH, WHAT DO YOU WANT?

TC: jUsT cHeCkInG oN mY bEsT bRo.

TC: sOmEtHiNg WrOnG wItH tHaT?

CG: …

CG: NO

TC: hOnK :o)

CG: QUIT IT WITH THE HONKING ALRIGHT?

TC: wHy?

CG: IT'S GETTING ANNOYING RIGHT ABOUT NOW.

TC: hOnK ;o)

CG: I HATE YOU.

TC: sUrE tHiNg.

TC: yOu GoInG tO dAvEs PaRtY tOmOrRoW?

CG: SOLLUX SAID HED DRAG ME THERE IF I DIDNT SHOW UP SO I GUESS IM COMING.

CG: I FUCKING HATE TO ASK BUT WOULD YOU MIND DRIVING ME THERE?

TC: aLwAyS rEaDy To HeLp A bRoThEr OuT.

TC: hOnK hOnK :o)

TC: sO yOuLl Be CoMiNg WiTh Me AnD tAv?

CG: YEAH, WHATEVER...

TC: gReAt!

TC: cOmE hErE tOmOrRoW aRoUnD fIvE oKaY?

CG: FINE...

TC: mOtHeRfUcKiNg MiraclEs!

TC: sEe YoU tOmOrRoW!

TC: hOnK hOnK hOnK :oD

terminallyCapricious [TC] ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]


	5. Chapter 5

**I'll have a few chapters scattered around with different peoples POV's just to keep the story a bit more exciting and fill in some possible blanks here and there. And this here is the first of them.**

**Enjoy!**

My name is Karkat Vantas.

I am currently situated in the living room of Dave Strider's house. This sounds like Kanaya speaking, maybe I should change that.

I look around and see lots of useless shit. That's more like it. There is a TV in one end of the room, a table some ways before it and a couch in front of the table. Then there are two armchairs in one corner and a drawer of some kind against one wall and there are fucking smuppets in every corner of this shitty room. Though there still is space. I have to give Strider and his fucking huge house some credit for getting every shitty sword and gear to fit inside.

What else do I see? I see people. Lots and lots of people. There's Gamzee, my best friend, with Tavros, his roommate and crush for like forever. With them is also Sollux, who I suppose is kind of good with computers. He is a total nerd, and probably way too skinny to even be alive. Must spend most of his time on the computer or at work, never actually eating.

Then there are Rose and Kanaya. Both some sort of therapists if I would be asked. They of course have a few years of age between them but that doesn't seem to bother them too much.

Close to them is Nepeta, the youngest of the group. She is really into cats, and I bet she owns at least five herself. With her is of course Equius, who seems to be almost like her bodyguard. Nepeta is talking to Terezi, my ex-girlfriend. She's blind, but that never stopped her from doing anything.

Feferi and Eridan are just entering at the door, where Dave is standing and they exchange a few words before the two of them come in. Feferi is beautiful, I guess, and she has this very rich family. Eridan comes from a similar family, but he's a hopeless hipster. He doesn't have a chance at really anything.

I follow Vriska for a bit with my gaze as she makes her way to Tavros, immediately picking on him. She's a huge bitch, always mean to everyone.

Aradia is the last one to arrive and she looks around for a bit as if deciding who to go to. She soon follows Vriska and is somehow able to send her off, leaving the spider bitch to stalk over to Terezi.

"All right everyone, eyes on the cool kid!" I hear Dave yell and growling something to myself I look at him, not really too eager.

"So, we're all here, right? Good. John and Jade will be here in", he checks the clock. "five minutes."

Everyone start whispering at the same time and I roll my eyes. Like this really is that big of a deal.

"I want you all to act well. No need to drive my best bro away the second he gets here. And about the party, I've got some music, food, drinks and games for us, so we won't get bored. Not like anyone would get bored around me", he says and I hear Terezi giggle a bit.

The last five minutes seem to take for-fucking-ever to go by. I'm about to ask Dave something about the guests, if they'll ever come, but I'm interrupted by the doorbell. Everyone goes quiet and Dave disappears to the door, soon coming back with two people.

First I notice the girl. She is fine looking with long black hair and green eyes. I guess this is Jade, and this is confirmed when Dave introduces her to the others.

Then I notice John. I stare at him for a good minute or so. He is probably the most gorgeous thing I have ever seen. He has startling blue eyes, goofy glasses, a cute little overbite barely noticeable and he wasn't even in a bad shape. I would bet he's taller than me, but well, who isn't. He is quickly introduced to some of the other people and seems to get along quiet well with them.

Then he notices me. I feel myself freeze as he smiles and walks to me, leaving Dave and Terezi fighting over something.

"Hi! I'm John. Nice to meet you!" he says smiling and I snap myself out of my trance shaking his hand.

"Karkat", I say, not able to think of anything else but his lovely eyes.

"So, you know Dave?" he asks grinning at the look on my face.

"Yeah, yeah I know him. From school", I answer trying to think of something else to say. "He hasn't shut up about you coming here. Doesn't give a single shit about anyone interrupting him."

John chuckles slightly and I see Dave coming from behind.

"See you've met Mr. Grumpypants, haven't you", he says stopping right next to John, draping one arm over his shoulders.

John looks at Dave a bit confused and Dave smirks. "You'll understand when you get to know him better."

John just looks at Dave for a second before Dave starts to drag him off to meet some others.

"Nice meeting you Karkat!" he says smiling again and I feel like I could melt then and there.

But of course I don't, that would be stupid and impossible at the same fucking time. So I just stuff my hands into the pockets of my hoody and look at Johns somewhat messy hair.

"You should have seen your motherfucking face bro. Like you'd been slapped with a miracle or some shit", Gamzee chuckles as he comes to stand with me.

"Shut up, asshole", I say frowning a bit.

"Seriously, I've never seen that look on your face before", he says smiling lazily.

"I'm warning you", I try to warn him, but seriously fail at that, never letting my eyes leave the back of John's head.

"Love at first sight?" he asks succeeding to make me blush a deep red and I slide to the floor, burying my face in my knees.

"Fuck off", I say a bit muffled by my own clothes.

"Aww, sorry bro, didn't mean to all up and upset you", I hear Gamzee say as he sits down on the floor next to me.

I raise my face to peek at the room. Dave's gone to put on some music and all the others are having somewhat of a nice time. Maybe I should try too.

Or not.

I watch as Dave comes back and takes the place behind Tavros's wheelchair, lazily leaning against it, head on top of Tavros's.

"Maybe you should go take Strider's hands off your roommate. At this pace you'll miss your fucking chance", I growl, getting up and look at Gamzee who is apparently planning on murdering Dave with just his eyes.

"Thanks for the motherfucking tip", he says in a low voice and gets up, walking to Dave and Tavros. I seriously don't want to see what will happen there, so I turn and jump back upon discovering Terezi a few inches from me.

"What the fuck? Planning on giving me a shitty end with a fucking heart-attack or something?" I yell, glaring at her. She just laughs it off and grins.

"Just wondering if you'd want to play a game of truth or dare with us", Terezi says shrugging a bit.

"No way", I answer and walk past her to sit on the couch.

"What? Is my little Karkles scared?" she asks dragging out the last word.

"What? Why the fuck would I be afraid of a stupid game?" I ask flopping on the couch.

"Karkles is scared to play a game!" Terezi's grin could have split her face in half.

"Nope. Not scared."

"Then prove it. Play with us!" she demands and I stare at her coldly.

"Fine, I'll play your shitty little game", I spit out and she jumps up in excitement dragging me to the middle of the room. She sit's me down with the others and soon we are all in a big circle in the middle.

The game starts out easy with little tasks like jumping around or questions about some stupid secrets. Then it starts to get gruesome. The tasks of 'run around the house three times' change to 'kiss this and this on the cheek'. Questions become more personal and a few have already left the game, including Rose, Kanaya, Nepeta and Equius.

I sigh. This game will not end well.


	6. Chapter 6

**I'm sorry for spamming all you followers with the updates but I want to get this story back up so I can start on the sequel. I'm so sorry :I**

I left the game pretty early. The dares coming from Vriska and Terezi didn't strike me as very fun. Better just leave it while I still can.

I roll next to the couch to follow the game, and am soon joined there by Rose and Kanaya.

"This is a rather childish game", Kanaya says straightening her long red skirt.

"Yes, I must agree", Rose says chuckling a bit. "But it is fun to watch."

I simply watch as the dares grow more awkward and am very glad I already left the game. Nepeta leaves the game soon, followed by Aradia and Equius. Pretty quickly it narrows down to just six players, Karkat, Gamzee, John, Dave, Terezi and Vriska. I have a feeling this won't go too well. Knowing Vriska she'd probably put the hardest dares she could think of to win.

The bottle is once again rolling and I watch it spin for a while. It stops pointing to Dave and he picks dare before Vriska can ask. She thinks for a while and an evil grin spreads on her face.

"I want you to go kiss the boy you love most in this room", she declares and I stare at her for a second. Was she trying to get Dave to leave the game with this? Knowing Dave this wouldn't be hard for him. Then another thought hits me. Someone he loved... Did he love a boy in the room?

I notice Dave only when he sits down on my lap. He gently turns my head to face him and I feel a blush creeping up to my face.

"You mind?" he asks, but I never get the chance to answer.

The kiss was a total surprise, and at first I freeze, not knowing what to do. I can't seem to make sense of anything. Everything is just a big mess in my head.

Then Dave pulls away, smirking a bit.

"I totally won that one!" he declares, but doesn't leave my lap. "But I think I might drop out now."

I stare at him dumbfounded, not able to register what just happened. He turns to look at me and the smile on his face fades a bit.

"Hey, dude, you okay?" he asks waving a hand before my face. I blink a few times before looking at him. I open my mouth to say something, but quickly close it, knowing I wouldn't get anything out.

Dave just laughs it off, taking a better position and starts playing with my hair absent-mindedly, watching the game at the same time.

I look at the game and notice Gamzee isn't playing. I look around for him and notice he's in a corner of the room, staring at Dave. The look on his face makes me flinch and Dave glances at me.

"What now, Tav?" he asks letting my hair go and tilts his head slightly.

"Umm, nothing. Nothing, really", I say looking back to the game.

The last four players finish the game and it turns out John won. Not even Vriska's stupid truths or dares got him out of the game. Dave gets out of my lap to go grab some drinks for everybody and I am left sitting there, feeling very confused.

"That was a bunch of shit. Fucking stupid game", Karkat grumbles sitting down on the sofa next to me.

"Yes, I think I, uhh, agree with that", I say quietly.

"Oh God", Karkat grumbles and I look at him a bit confused. He snaps at me about the staring and I turn my gaze away, blushing slightly.

I quickly find Gamzee in the corner where he was a while back and he smiles at me like he usually does.

"Are you alright?" I ask a bit worried. The murderous look on his face earlier had really scared me, and I wonder how Dave didn't notice it. Or if he did he didn't react in any way.

"What would make you think that?" he asks grinning a bit and ruffles my hair.

"Oh, uhh, I don't know", I say shyly. Maybe I should ask him about the look. Was he mad at Dave for something? Or maybe he was mad at me. That would be awful. But I don't think I did anything wrong. Did I? My thoughts are interrupted, though, by Dave's voice.

"Makara, catch!" he says throwing Gamzee a bottle of Faygo, which he catches without difficulty. Smirking Dave approaches me and hands me a glass of, well, something. I'm not really sure what it is and Dave just chuckles slightly. "Don't worry. It's not poisoned."

I blush a bit and sip the drink. Yeah, it's another type of Faygo. Just the color, yellow, had made me wonder.

Dave leans against the wall so I am now in the middle of them. I look at Gamzee on my right quickly and notice he hasn't even opened his drink. A worried looks comes up to my face, but neither of the two notice.

"Will you guys be staying for long?" Dave asks eyeing the crowd.

"I doubt it", Gamzee answers with a low tone to his voice, which makes me worry even more.

"Huh, what a shame", Dave says sipping his own drink. "You know what? I think I could drive this cutie home if you want to leave and he wants to stay."

I blush a bit the worry drowning from my face in an instant.

"There's no need for that", Gamzee growls and I'm surprised that Dave doesn't seem to notice.

"What if you let Tav make up his own mind?" Dave asked turning to look at Gamzee. The two stared at each other for a few seconds before looking at me. I turn my confused look to the ground.

"Umm, I, uhh, think I might go, with Gamzee", I mutter and Dave frowns a bit.

"What was that? I didn't hear", he says crouching down next to me.

"I, uhh, said I'll go with Gamzee", I say a bit louder and Dave looks at me through his glasses.

"Well take your time, no need to rush", he grins and walks off to Terezi and the others, starting a chat.

"Well, do you wanna leave now or later?" Gamzee asks leaning against the wall, back to normal once again. I look for a clock and after finding it decide I still have time to spend with friends.

"Maybe a bit, uhh, later, if you don't mind", I say and he smiles, agreeing to stay. I join the others while they start a new game. Or I would have joined, but Twister is sort of a hard game for me to be playing, what with my useless legs. I couldn't really do much with them.

I watch the others play, collapsing on each other and start to feel a bit down. It would be lovely to play with them, have fun like I used to have. God, it seemed so long ago that my legs were amputated.

They finish the game fairly quickly and try to pick a new game. Only problem was no-one seemed to get the decision done.

"We could sing some karaoke", Dave suggests and most of us agree. Dave plucks the controllers to the right machines and sets the game up faster than I ever could have. He puts the CD in and hands the second mike to Terezi. They start singing a song I don't recognize, but I like it anyways. I enjoy most music, actually.

A few songs go by with different singers and I notice Dave approaching me.

"Wanna sing?" he asks cocking one blonde eyebrow up.

"Um, sure, why not", I say smiling slightly. Dave just smirks and leans against my wheelchair, waiting for Vriska and Terezi to finish their song.


	7. Chapter 7

**I'm back everybody! So I didn't have time to upload the sixth chapter morning I left. I'm sorry :I**

**But now I have uploaded it and started working on the story yet again! So a whole bunch of updates coming, I hope.**

My teeth clench together and my jaw is starting to hurt from the pressure. My eyes are on Dave as he pushes Tavros up to the karaoke machine, so the two can sing their song. Of course I wanted to be there with Tavbro, but I couldn't really just go push Dave away without a good reason. So I just stand behind the couch, directly behind Karkat, gripping said couches back tightly in my hands.

The song slowly starts and I recognize it immediately. I guess it was Dave's idea to sing the song. It really made me angry, but the moment they started singing I forgot my rage. Tavbro's voice just made my mind go blank.

_You are my everything_

_You taught me how to sing_

_You took a chance on me_

_Opened my heart to see_

Of course Dave would pick this song. Why wouldn't he? Probably just trying to hit on Tavros again.

_You are my light in dark_

_The ever-shining spark_

_You are my other half_

_You always make me laugh_

Even though I envy Dave for being there instead of me, I can't bring myself to even glare at him. It's like my eyes are glued to the back of Tavros's head.

_I'm so in love with you_

_I'm lovestruck_

_And all the things you do_

_I'm lovestruck_

_I know we can break through_

_I'm lovestruck_

_I'm the servant from hell_

_One day, I can't cast my spell_

_I'm so in love with you_

_I'm lovestruck_

_And all the things you do_

_I'm lovestruck_

_I know we can break through_

_I'm lovestruck_

_La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la_

The music takes hold of me and I start humming along, forgetting for a second Dave is there and start humming along.

_I can't see myself without you_

_Now that I've had a taste_

_Every time I close my eyes_

_I feel your lips, I see your face_

I hear only Tav's voice, Dave's completely left out. And I don't really mind.

_I only smile when I'm with you_

_I spend all day missing you_

_I'm lovestruck, in your head_

_Every thought, every breath_

At this point some depressing thoughts crept their way into my head.

_So in love with you, So in love with you_

_I'm falling, I'm falling, I'm falling in love_

Of course. That's why Dave chose the song. How stupid of me.

_Cupid caught me when I let down my guard_

_Who know it was so great? Who know I'd fall this hard?_

_We can run away, and never look back_

_Forget about our past, the future's what we have._

To tell Tavros about his feelings.

The song ended and I watch as Dave bends down and kisses Tavros full on the lips. What hurts me more is to see Tavros smile after a second and kiss back.

Why didn't I listen to Nepeta? I should have just told Tav how I feel, not keep it all inside. But it was late now. And I hated it. I hated Dave. But most of all I hated myself. I might quote Karkat here, but I think I just missed my fucking chance.


	8. Chapter 8

**Next chapter right here! Hope you enjoy!**

The streetlamps go by rather quickly, mostly I suspect because Gamzee was driving faster than he should. He has been awfully quiet the whole car ride home and barely said good bye to Karkat while dropping him off.

I try to think of something to break the silence with, but nothing comes to my mind. I can't even think of anything that would have upset my best friend.

"Uhh, Gamzee?" I ask tentatively. He doesn't react so I raise my voice a bit to get his attention. "Gamzee!"

He jerks out of his thoughts and glances at me, smiling slightly. "Yeah? What's on your mind bro?" he asks turning his eyes back to the street.

"More like what's on yours", I ask unusually sure of myself. Gamzee's smile falters for a bit but comes back wider than the last time.

"Why would you ask that?" he questions turning to the yard of our apartment.

"Just wondering. You've been so quiet", I answer and he freezes. Quickly he continues to make his way out of his car, getting my wheelchair and helping me down. Not once does he say a thing.

"Are you all right?" I ask a bit worried. Gamzee smiles at me as he pushes me into the elevator.

"I'm fine, don't worry your head 'bout it Tavbro", he says grinning and seems to go back to usual, starting a chat about how miraculous grasshoppers were. Where he got that idea was beyond me.

The two of us make our way back to our apartment and he says he'll grab something to eat and go to sleep. I just nod smiling a bit and get something for myself as well.

Instead of going to sleep though, I watch some TV. I'm not really tired and I'm not sure what to think of Dave's feelings. I would probably just think about him the whole night if I tried to sleep right now.

I watch the TV till the clock strikes eleven. When nothing good is on anymore I wheel to my room where I indeed find Gamzee fast asleep. I smile a bit and quietly make my way to my computer, which I grab and go back to the living room.

I turn it on and check who's on Pesterchum. Really I'm not that surprised that no-one is on. That I was expecting. Instead I decide to surf on the net for a while.

I flinch a bit when I hear the beep in my headphones announcing an incoming message. I open the chat and smile slightly.

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering adiosToreador

TG: hello cutie.

TG: watcha think about the party?

AT: uHH,, iT WAS NICE,

TG: come on, it was fucking awesome.

TG: like straight out shit from party heaven.

AT: oH, uHH, yEAH,,

TG: haha, don't worry.

TG: i won't push it.

TG: by the way, why are you on so late?

AT: oHH, i COULDN'T SLEEP,,

TG: why not? Something troubling you?

TG: the juggalo keeping you up?

AT: oHH NO, nOTHING LIKE THAT,

AT: bESIDES gAMZEE IS ASLEEP ALREADY,,

TG: so what is it?

AT: ,,,

TG: the kiss?

AT: hOW DID YOU, uHH, kNOW?

TG: damn it.

TG: note to self, never listen to johns advice ever again.

TG: i fucked up, right?

AT: wHAT?

AT: nO!

AT: iT WAS NICE,,,

TG: what?

TG: you liked it?

AT: yES, iT WAS NICE,

AT: uHH, iN IT'S, uMM, oWN WAY,

TG: oh for fucks sake, why not just ask.

TG: tavros, wanna be my boyfriend?

AT: oHH, wELL, uMM,,,

AT: i-I'LL THINK ABOUT IT,

TG: …

TG: all right.

TG: we could go on a date tomorrow if that would help you decide.

AT: o-OHH, wHAT KIND OF, uHH, dATE?

TG: we could go to the movies, or get something to eat, or just walk around.

TG: anything, basically.

AT: uMM, sURE, wHY NOT,

TG: so where'd you wanna go?

AT: i DON'T REALLY KNOW,

TG: well let me surprise you then.

TG: i'll pick you up tomorrow at let's say 12 o'clock.

AT: oKAY, sOUNDS, uHH, gOOD,

TG: great.

TG: see you tomorrow cutie.

turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering adiosToreador

I stare at the screen for what seems like an eternity.

A date, huh? So Dave was serious about this? Well, might as well try it out, even though I still am not sure about this. Maybe being with him could give me a confidence boost. Or maybe some of his coolness would rub off onto me.

I smile to myself as I close my computer. I bring it back to my room, climb into my bed and quietly rid myself of my clothing.

I wriggle under my sheets and close my eyes, trying to fall asleep.

Sleep just isn't co-operating with me tonight. It's nearly one o'clock and my eyes are wide open. Even though I'm tired I can barely keep my eyes closed. I sit up and look around the room until I stop my gaze on Gamzee.

He seems to be asleep, so it's no wonder his voice scares the hell out of me.

"Why aren't you asleep bro?" he asks groggily, leaning up on one hand.

"Ga-gamzee! You scared me!" I stutter staring at him.

"Oh, sorry bro, didn't mean to", he says scrunching his brows a bit.

"N-no, no, it's fine", I answer trying to get my heart to settle back down.

"So what's keeping you up at this time of the night?" he asks a bit worried.

"I, uhh, don't know. I just can't, umm, fall asleep", I admit shyly.

"Want me to come there with you?" he asks, maybe a bit hopefully, but I don't really notice.

"Oh, you don't need to, really", I try but he's already up and walking to my bed. I make some room for him and smiling he lays down next to me, wrapping you in his arms. I really don't want to, but he's warm and soothing, so I nuzzle my head at the crook of his neck.

"Sweet dreams Tavbro", he whispers pulling the blanket over the two of us and I quickly fall asleep in his arms.


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry I didn't update yesterday. Hopefully you don't mind too much. But here's the next chapter anyways. I'll try getting a few up again today.**

I wake up to the sunlight entering my apartment. I then notice I'm still in Tavros's bed, quiet close to him actually. He's sleeping his back against my chest and I have my arms around his waist, one leg between his legs. I blush slightly and carefully pull my leg away. For once I am quiet glad my bro doesn't feel his legs.

My movements get him to stir and he tenses for a second before remembering last night's events and relaxes. "What time is it?" he asks groggily and I glance at the clock. "Near ten", I answer and he perks up.

"Two more hours", he mumbles and I raise myself on one elbow, looking at him.

"Two hours 'till what?" I ask tilting my head a bit, but given to my current position it doesn't really do much.

"Oh, yeah, I, umm, got a date with Dave", he answers turning around. I freeze, staring at him, not really seeing him. He has a date with Dave? Since when?

"What?" I ask not sure if I heard correctly.

"Well, we chatted for a while yesterday, and he sort of asked me out", Tavros mumbles blushing and looking away from me.

"Oh", I manage. I throw the blanket off of me and get up rather quickly. Quickly enough to get Tavros's attention.

"Is something wrong?" he asks and I feel a bit bad for making him worry.

"Nothing. Figured I'd get some motherfucking breakfast", I answer grinning lazily and Tav smiles at me. I don't bother with my clothes and walk to the kitchen in only my purple boxers, staring into the fridge. It seems very hard to decide on what to eat.

I end up eating a few sandwiches and Tavros soon joins me taking some cereal and tee. I eat in silence and he seems to fall into his thoughts, not focusing on anything.

I keep my gaze on his eyes, but they seem to stare straight through me into nothing. Shrugging it off I rise and grab a glass to get something to drink. I chose orange juice, since Tavros always told me to not drink Faygo the first thing in the morning. Talking about something it did to my teeth, I guess.

So I drink a glass of orange juice, put the glass away and look at the clock. No hurry to anything really. Might as well watch some TV.

I slump to the living room and turn the TV on. It seems this snaps Tav out of his little trance, since he wheels over to the kitchen counter and put away his dishes, disappearing to our room straight after.

It's nearing twelve and I've actually managed to get on some loose pants. Other than that I haven't really done anything. I've played on my computer for a while and checked out some of my cellphone's features, but mostly I've watched some shows on the television, none of them being very good.

Tavros on the other hand has been getting himself ready. He has done something to his Mohawk, I notice, but I'm not sure what it is. Maybe he used some hair gel, I am not entirely sure. He has also been looking for the right clothes, deciding that if the date would be at some cafe he shouldn't dress too greatly.

I look over my shoulder and end up staring at Tav.

He has on a T-shirt with one of his favourite band's logos on it, and since it's sort of chilly outside he's got a plain dark brown (almost black) hoodie on top of it, the zipper pulled up to around his chest. He's also got a pair of capris which end a bit under his stumps, but not too far down to make it look silly. I simply can't tear my eyes off of him, even though I only see his back and some of him from the image in the mirror.

A knock on the door gets both our attentions and Tavros goes to open it.

"It's precisely twelve o'clock, and I'm here to pick I up for our first date", I hear Dave say and immediately return my gaze to the television, gripping the remote tighter than necessary.

"Gamzee, I'm going now. I'll be back before four", Tavros yells to me and the door is closed. I stare blankly at the television and decide I want to see someone. And probably I'd want to take my pills, too. It wouldn't be nice to tear the whole place down in my anger.

I fetch my pills from the bathroom and pop two out of the can. I put them in my mouth and wash them down with some water. After that I go to the kitchen and pour myself a glass of something. It so happens to be Faygo and I smile a bit. God I love Faygo.

After this I begin my search for my cellphone. Honestly I can't remember where I put it. It takes me almost fifteen minutes to find that damned thing before I can start going through my contact list.

Of course I choose Karkat, why wouldn't I?

TC: hEy BeSt FrIeNd, MiNd If I cOmE oVeR?

TC: iT's BoRiNg HeRe AlL aLoNe.

CG: WHERE DID YOU LOSE YOUR BROCRUSH NOW?

TC: he's on a date with DAVE MOTHERFUCKING STRIDER

CG: WHAT THE FUCK?

CG: SO SOON?

CG: I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEY WHERE DATING.

TC: cAn I cOmE oVeR?

CG: WAIT, I'LL ASK JOHN.

TC: oH, iS hE tHeRe? ;o)

CG: FUCK YOU.

CG: GET YOUR LAZY ASS HERE THIS INSTANT.

TC: tHaNkS kArBrO :o)

TC: hOnK

I shove my phone in my pocket, get a shirt and add a fresh layer of make-up on my face.

"All up and ready to go", I say grinning widely. My reflection stares back at me looking a bit strained. I need to get my chill on before getting to Karkat's place.

The walk over to my bro's apartment gives me enough time to calm down and act like nothing ever happened. I knock at his door before opening it, which is rather unusual of me. After closing the door I proceed deeper into the apartment and find John and Karkat playing some wicked game with zombies and monsters.

John glances at me and smiles.

"Hi Gamzee!" he says cheerfully and looks back at the game in time to see his character die. "Shoot!"

"Aha! I win!" Karkat yells and I sit down on the sofa next to John.

"What awesome game is this?" I ask smiling slightly.

"It's Left 4 Dead, and we're supposed to _work together_", John says, not able to really do anything to Karkat, who's sitting on the floor farther away.

"So what?" Karkat asks, while John gets his character back up and goes help Karkat with the monsters.

The day continues like this and I beat Karkat's ass in any game he chose, having close matches with John. I guess this is one way of forgetting Dave, if only just for the moment.


	10. Chapter 10

**Oh, now that I remember, someone asked me about why I took the original version down. Well, simply it's because it's against the site rules to write in second person view (you did this and you did that). Don't ask me why, but it's the rules and I'm gonna obey them from now on.**

I had been dreaming of a fun time with my friends, while I still had my legs. The dream, though, was abruptly interrupted by Gamzee. First thing I noticed was he was moving. He had moved so his hands were around my waist and his leg was somewhat uncomfortably between my legs.

Even as the position was terrible I didn't want to wake him up. He had always been a bit cranky when woken up early. I twisted just enough to see what time it was. Seven in the morning. Just great. I'll just try to get some more sleep.

It takes me a better half of two hours before I finally fall into a restless sleep, getting once again woken by Gamzee moving, this time pulling farther away from me. I tense for a bit, but then remember he's in my bed with my permission, sort of. Relaxing I look at him and smile a bit.

"What time is it?" I ask groggily trying to rub the sleep out of my eyes.

"Near ten", he answers and I instantly perk up.

"Two more hours", I mumble smiling slightly. Then I start getting a bit nervous. This would be my first ever date with anyone.

"Two hours for what?" he asks tilting his head and I resist the urge to giggle at his funny look.

"Oh, yeah, I, umm, got a date with Dave", I answer and his expression goes weird for a second. He looks like he can't really think of anything.

"What?" he asks voice a bit hoarse and I blink a few times.

"Well, we chatted for a while yesterday, and he sort of asked me out", I mumble and look away, feeling the blush creep up my chins.

"Oh", he says a bit strained and gets up, throwing the blanket away and off of me at the same time.

"Is something wrong?" I ask worried. Did I do something? Insult him maybe? Or did I say something wrong?

"Nothing. Figured I'd get some motherfucking breakfast", he answers and leaves to the kitchen. I look after him for a while before getting in my wheelchair and grabbing a big shirt. I wheel into the kitchen to find him making some bread and take some cereal and tee for myself.

I fall into my thoughts while eating and snap out of it only when I hear the TV flip on. Quickly I put away my dishes and disappear into my room. After looking around for half an hour I decide to put on a T-shirt with one of my favourite bands logos, a loose brown hoodie on top of that and pull on some greenish, whatever that color is capris. I've said something to Gamzee while I was looking for clothes, talking mostly to myself, since he didn't seem to be too into the conversation.

After choosing my clothes I go to the bathroom. I use some gel to get my Mohawk to stay down, but don't really want to use too much. I then brush my teeth and after staring at my reflection for a while I decide this would have to be good enough.

I go back to the living room, or more like the hall from the living room to the other rooms, and look at my reflection. I'm rather happy with it, like I usually wouldn't be. I almost jump out of my wheelchair when I hear the knock on the door and quickly go open it.

"It's precisely twelve o'clock, and I'm here to pick you up for our first date", Dave says smirking and I smile back shyly.

"Yeah, uhh, I'll go get my keys, and we can go", I say and grab my keys from the kitchen, taking my phone with I. "Gamzee, I'm going now. I'll be back before four."

With that said Dave grabs the handles of my wheelchair and despite me resisting rather weakly he pushes me to the elevator and we're on our way.

As I guessed, the date isn't anything special. First Dave takes me to a small cafe, where we get something to drink and talk about, well, nothing in particular. Then he pushes me to a park and buys ice cream for the both of us. I sit in the park for a while, watching kids playing around. I feel kind of depressed watching the kids run around with each other, since I can't really do that.

"What's wrong?" Dave asks, interrupting my thoughts.

"Oh, umm, it's nothing", I try to shake it off, but Dave doesn't stop there.

"Oh yeah? I can see something's botherin' you, so spit it out", he says blankly.

"I just, was thinking of running, when I still could..." I travel off and my gaze drops to the ground. I'm caught off guard when Dave picks me up out of my wheelchair and sets me down on the bench next to him, hugging me closer. He doesn't really say anything, just holds me, but it helps a bit.

After sitting there for a while and getting a strange look from some older woman Dave asks if I'm better yet. I nod and smile slightly and he grins a bit.

"Knew some cuddles would cheer you up", he says and I stick my tongue out at him.

The rest of the date is rather enjoyable and soon we're saying our good byes in front of my apartment. He walks down the stairs and I enter the small apartment just to find it empty. So Gamzee's gone somewhere, probably out of boredom.

I don't really worry too much and start making some food, even though I'm pretty bad at it. I just feel too happy right now to really care. Maybe I'll ask Gamzee where he is after eating.

I put the dishes into the dishwasher and take a plate of food for myself. It's not as bad as my cooking usually. It actually is edible. I'm delighted and I grab my phone sending a message to Gamzee asking whether he would come to eat with me now or would I put the food in the fridge for him. The answer is a yes for the first and not too long after that I hear him come in.

"Hi Tavbro!" I hear him say from the hall and I smile.

"Hi Gamzee", I answer. "I made some food for us."

"You made food?" he asks coming into the kitchen. He takes some onto his plate and sits down in front of me. "Smells nice."

My smile widens at the look on his face. He probably didn't think it would be edible, and I don't blame him for that.

"Bro, dude, this is motherfucking miracles!" he says grinning and takes more of the food, devouring the whole dish quickly.

I laugh at his silly choice of words and think I couldn't feel happier.


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks for the reviews guys! I really appreciate it! Maybe you could even tell me what I could do better some time c:**

Whatever I did, I'd never want to hurt Tavros. But right now, even though it would hurt him, I'm hoping his date went horribly, that Dave wasn't serious. I don't really believe in this, since he did cook food and he's been cheerful the whole time I've been eating.

"Sooo, how'd the date go?" I ask just to be polite.

"Oh, it was awesome!"

My heart drops and shatters to pieces at this statement. I blink away the tears and smile.

"Great!" I say mentally beating myself. I only wanted his best. Right?

"We had so much fun. First we went to the cafe and talked a whole lot about stuff. Then we went to the park."

I tune out of his monologue. He's really happy. Dave makes him happy. He's not even stuttering now, just talking on and on about what they did. He had always stuttered before, no matter what I did, or anyone did for that matter.

But Dave made him happy.

I nod every now and then, smiling and doing my best to act normal. I listen to his talking even as it tears me apart from the inside.

I should have done something while I still could. While I still had my fucking chance.

After he's done I get up, smile and say I'm going to go for a walk. He waves to me and starts putting the dishes away.

I get out of the apartment as fast as I can, taking only my phone with me. I barely notice the change in weather as I storm out of the building, rushing past houses and small shops, never stopping until I've walked around for some time. I take a destination and head once again for Karkat's place.

Wait, I've already been there. Don't want to bother him too often. Where to then?

Sollux's place. He was usually alone, he would listen to me talk, and he already knew about my feelings. Perfect.

After deciding on my destination I made my way to it, bursting into Sollux's house.

"What the fuck? Gam, haven't you heard of knocking?" he yells at me and his hetero-chromatic eyes make me flinch a bit. I try to not let them get to me this time as I close the door and walk to his bed, falling down there. Sollux follows me and sits down in his chair in front of his computer.

"Tho, what'th up?" he asks tilting his head slightly.

"Dave took Tav out on a date", I answer rubbing my temples lightly. Why did I have this fucking headache?

"Oh, now I get it", he says and stares at I. "Need a feelingth jam or thomething?" he asks and I sigh.

"Yeah, sure, whatever", I answer.

"Wait a thec, I'll get thomething to drink. Want thome Faygo?"

I nod and soon he's back with two bottles of Faygo, one for me and one for himself. I thank him, sit up and open the bottle, sipping some of the drink.

Then I proceed to telling him everything, how I hate Dave for taking Tav, how I couldn't really blame him and how I hate myself, because in the end it's all my fault. Sollux doesn't say anything, just watches me and drinks his Redpop Faygo.

I end my rant on everything and fall into silence, leaning against the wall next to his bed and drink the rest of my Faygo. I put the bottle down on the floor, since I can't reach a table and put my chin down on my knees, which I hug against my chest. I missed my chance. I missed my fucking chance. Karkat was right. He was always right. I should have done something instead of letting him go.

"Fuck, you really need help", Sollux says and I look up at him confused. "Oh for fuck'th thake, you're crying. You never cry!"

I hadn't realized the tears before, but now that I notice them I can't seem to get them to stop.

"I'll call KK, you need thome theriouth help, and I jutht can't let you go home all alone. Who knowth where you'd end up!" he says a tad worried. He goes to another room to call Karkat, making it impossible for me to make out any words.

He then comes back and crouches down on the bed in front of me.

"Lithten, you need to get yourthelf together. I don't care if you tell Tav about your feelingth or not. Go ruin hith relationthip, thee if I care! I jutht hate thith thide of you. I hate it when you get deprethed. Thoon you'll go crazy and thart hurting people. You know thith, Gamzee! Get a grip, man, and continue forward. Thop acting like you can't breath without him", he growls, and I stare at him taken back by what he just said.

"Shit, man, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to all up and get you upset", I say blinking a few times, trying to think of something.

"Tho you back yet?" he asks getting up and I nod slightly, not really sure.

"Good. KK thould be here any moment to take you back to your place. Do whatever you want there, but try not to break anything, okay?"

I just nod again and follow him to the door, where Karkat just arrived. He and Sollux exchange a few words before he grabs my hand and drags me to his car.

"I think I got this solved", I inform him on the ride back home.

"Got what solved, fuckass?" he asks grumpily.

"I'll try to make Tav the happiest person on the planet! Even if he doesn't want me", I add the smile on my face faltering for a bit.

"Good for you", he answers sarcasm practically dripping from his voice and I chuckle slightly. "Nice to see you're back."

"It's nice to motherfucking be back", I answer and he punches my shoulder, stopping the car.

"Now get the fuck out of my car, I have stuff to do", he says.

"Stuff to do with who?" I ask and he yells at me in a way that gets me out of his car and into the safety of my apartment in a second. I watch him leave and wave lazily before he disappears, though I think he didn't see it. I then make my way up to our apartment. It could have been a better day, but at least I don't have to end it all gloomy and shit.


	12. Chapter 12

**Pushing in this random Dave POV. And also thinking of starting to write the sequel already for those old readers who've already read the story. Got some ideas for that too.**

"He seemed really down yesterday, like he wasn't really there. But he still beat me and Karkat many times! Maybe he used his anger to play better or something along the lines." John was going on and on about yesterday and how Gamzee 'hadn't seemed to be there'.

"So watcha think got the clown so down?" I ask expressionless.

"Dave! You should at least pretend to care for me!" John exclaimed and I shrug.

"I don't give a flying fuck about that shithead. Probably planning on how to ruin Tav's fun right about now, thinking of breaking us apart", I answer rolling my eyes behind my shades.

"But he's our friend! Wait, what?" John stops abruptly, mouth slightly open. "You and Tavros are together?"

"Yeah, so?" I ask not really seeing the point. Maybe I missed something.

"So!? Since when? You didn't tell me!" he shouts clearly upset and I sigh. So that's what I forgot.

"Sorry man, meant to tell you at some point. I guess I couldn't because you were rambling on and on about our clown friends little problems in life!" I shoot back and John glares at me.

"At least I care for my friends."

"He's not my friend", I answer coldly. Okay, so maybe I was being too rough with John. He didn't deserve this. But the thought that Gamzee would probably squish me to death any chance he got just for me making a move when he didn't.. It wasn't a pleasant one. "He's a bit off. I think he takes some sort of pills."

"Oh, I didn't know that. How do you know?" John asks and I sigh once more.

"I've visited their house. The clown has his stuff pretty much everywhere", I say not really wanting to speak about this particular subject.

"Oh wait, you said something about him ruining your relationship. Why would he do that?" John asks shooting away at some zombies. He really seems to like Left 4 Dead, even though I think it's a shitty game.

"He's had his eye on Tav for God knows how long", I answer bluntly and John turn his head towards me. How he manages to still stay alive is something I don't understand, but he does so and after staring at me for a second continues with his game.

"Well... That's a bummer", he says slowly, searching for words.

"A bummer for him, but I don't know if Tav knows. Anyways, he's with me now, end of story."

"This is just one gay village. Is everyone into guys here?" he asks and I grin.

"Maybe", is my only answer. I wouldn't say it to John, but most of my friends were.

We play L4D for a while before shutting down the console and I insist on playing some Amnesia. Even though John played L4D, he still screamed like a little girl at the jump scares in my dark room, gripping my hand painfully tight.

"Ow, John, that hurts", I say pulling away without any result. "Really, let my hand go. Dude, it's just a game."

"Oh, sorry Dave", he says blushing and quickly straightens up, looking at the game.

After only like five minutes it happens again and I get tired of it.

"Let's do something else. You're too much of a pussy to play anything with a little more than zombies and guns", I mock him and he sticks his tongue out at me. For a second he reminds me of Tavros in the park yesterday, but I quickly push that thought out of my mind. "Want something to eat?"

"That sounds great!" John says and I order two pizzas, too lazy to make anything myself. We then proceed to have a puppet fight with my bro's smuppets, which ends with the two of us panting and laughing in a big pile of those god-awful things.

The doorbell rings and I go open it, paying for the pizzas and returning to the pile. We eat most of them in the pile and put the rest away in the fridge. After a little lying around in the stupid pile of ugly dolls we decide it's time to do something.

A walk around the neighborhood sounds nice and I decide to show John some important places so he wouldn't look so lost.

"There's Sollux's place, and Karkat's is a little ways over there. Then there's that little shop and a bar a few blocks that way. Tav lives with the juggalo dude a bit farther, closer to the schools and stuff. It's somewhere there."

I show John around the places near my house and wonder off farther till we come to the park where I took Tav.

"This looks nice", he says eyeing the people there. "Is there a beach in this town perhaps?"

"Yeah. Wait, not exactly in town, a little drive out of town, but it's fairly close", I ponder this for a moment. Why would John want to know about beaches? Thinking of swimming at this time of the year?

"We just have to go there for a swim sometime soon!" he says cheerfully and I almost break my stoic expression.

"Are you fucking mad? You've finally gone mad, haven't you? It's fucking freezing there!" I say in disbelief.

"That's exactly why we should go!" John says excited, like a little child with a new toy.

"Yeah, you've finally snapped", I say and he punches me on the shoulder playfully. I continue the tour until we get bored and go over to John's new house to check it out. It's bigger than my and bro's. It's two stories tall and has many rooms in it, a large kitchen being one of them.

"This is fucking huge", I point out . "Why'd you buy a house so big for three?"

"Dad just thought it'd be a good idea to have some room. You know Bec likes to run around and so on", John says and I glance at him.

"Oh yeah, almost forgot about that little devil", I say and John chuckles.

"He's not bad, you're just afraid of him, is all!" he says happy to finally have found a weakness in me. I hate dogs. All of them. Even the smallest. But big dogs? I was frightened by them. Becquerel just so happened to be fucking huge. John says he's a mix between a few breeds, including Irish Wolfhound, German Shepherd and a wolf, too. I wonder how he could love that crazy thing.

I enter the house and put my jacket away, taking off my shoes as John insist. I then leave the lobby-like room and am instantly caught off guard and pummeled to the ground by a huge black and brown furry beast also known as Jade's dog, Becquerel.

"Get the fuck off me!" I yell and push the dog away from my face, sitting up. John's giggling beside me, not doing anything to help. "Don't just stand there laughing your ass off, get this thing off me!"

After getting his laugh John finally grabs Bec's collar and somehow manages to pull him off of me. He looks like he's having trouble getting the dog to stay in place and I briefly wonder how Jade has no trouble with him, but as long as he's not on top of me I'm fine with John struggling a bit.

"Let's go see what Jade's doing, okay?" John suggests and I'm glad to be able to get away from the dog, even though it doesn't have trouble following us up the stairs.

The day goes by rather quickly as we play games, chat, climb on top of the house, run away from Bec and do other stuff like that. I think the time went by too fast as I say good bye and leave for my house. Maybe bro would be there cleaning the pile of smuppets. That would be fun to explain. Maybe we could even have a strife or something.

I get back to find the house empty. Apparently bro has to work late tonight. Well, better make some food and hit the bed. And bring the computer along for the ride.


	13. Chapter 13

**This chapter's a bit longer than usual, and I think the story jumps a lot forward at this point, but forgive me for being too lazy to write the goings of one month :I**

**Anyways, hope you enjoy it!**

A month flew by quicker than I would have liked. Well, it was nice to know winter was coming, but I felt like I'd missed something. Something important having to do with my feels for Tav. I still hadn't told him a thing. Not a single fucking thing. And he was still together with Dave.

To be honest I had tried a total of two times to break them up. The attempts ended up both being massive failures and not really worth my time. Not like I even put much effort into them, because I didn't want to hurt Tav in any way.

The first time was a bit after they had started dating, Dave and Tavros. I had slipped some salt into Dave's drink, getting him to spit it all over Tav. It was really hilarious, but it didn't do anything to the relationship.

The second attempt had had a little more attempt to it. A lot more, actually. I had set up a little trap which almost sent Dave tumbling down the apartment buildings stairs. If it weren't for his ninja skills and that stupid backflip which landed him standing on a stair a little ways down I'm sure it would have worked. The stupid shit just got Tav worried for Dave and amazed at his ability to pull off such a stunt with no preparation.

So the two attempts failed and I hadn't tried anything after that, just slipped into the background and let them enjoy it. Watching a happy Tav was nice, but knowing Strider was the one behind it got me a bit down every time.

It was the morning of a Monday, yet again. Tav had already left for school and I was just waking up from an incredible dream. I kept my eyes closed and tried to fall back asleep. What had the dream been about?

Oh yeah. Tavros.

In my dream the two of us had been chilling at my old apartment and somehow ended up in bed. I could recall all the sweet little voices he would make, and... And-

God damnit! The thinking led me to realize I was painfully hard and I hoped Tav hadn't noticed anything. I then head for the shower to take care of business and probably clean myself while I'm at it.

I emerge from the shower drying my black hair, which apart from the times right after showering was always very tangled and sort of bushy too. I wrap a towel around my waist, too lazy to put on anything else just yet and get to the kitchen to make some food.

I notice a note on the fridge and take it off, reading it rather unenthusiastically.

I'm going to go to the cafe with Dave after school. I'll come around four to eat.

Hope to see you then!

-Tavros

I feel myself getting very angry and shred the note into little pieces which I throw into the trash. Dave, Dave, Dave. It was always something with Dave. He always had to ruin everything. He took away my miracles. He took away my yet-to-be boyfriend. He just ruined everything, didn't he?

The sound of shattering glass brings me back to reality and I notice I've broken the cup I was holding against the wall. What the fuck got to me? Oh yeah, Dave.

Quickly I clean up the mess I've made and proceed to make breakfast, taking a mental note to grab my pills. I get some sandwiches like usual, but instead of coffee or juice I decide to do what Tav always does. I decide to try out how tee tastes.

Last time I'd had tee it wasn't really good. It had been some sort of lemon, or something like that and it had tasted just absolutely horrible. I just hope this will be better.

After watching Tav do it so many times I think I know what to do. I heat up some water, pour it into a mug with some tee powder and put a few cubes of sugar in before mixing it. The tee should taste something along the lines of apple. Better than lemons, I suppose.

So after waiting for the tee to cool down a bit I take a careful sip and almost burn my tongue. Oh god, how did Tav get to all up and drinking this if it wouldn't cool down? So I wait a little more and go get some clothes in the meantime.

I return and take a careful sip of the tee. This time it's cooled down to something I could drink. So I gulp down some tee, trying to figure if I like it or not. I guess it's not too bad, but I will definitely stick to coffee. Not that I like that much either. This stuff seems to be an awful lot of work to go through every morning. How come Tav gets it to look so easy?

I continue drinking my tee and try to figure out what to do with the rest of my day. I actually end up in the library again, talking to Sollux once and burying myself in a book for the rest of the time. Karkat messages me a few times and Sollux comes by to tell me to shut my phone. There were younger kids here and the mothers wouldn't appreciate my choice of alarm.

I quickly get back to the book, which is really rare. The book itself isn't that good to be honest. I just need something else to think about than Dave and the book has lots of mystical creatures and shit like that. They sort of remind me of Tav, how he loves these sorts of things.

Sollux comes to me at around half five, dragging me to the backroom to eat. I've actually read the book I'm holding three times already, too lazy to get a new book and am very glad to get a reason to leave it there.

"Tho, why aren't you home? I bet Tav ith already there", he lisps and I chuckle lightly.

"Just wanna all up and hang with my coolest bro", I answer and he stares at me for a bit before taking another bite of his food.

"You know, John hath come up with an idea to go thwimming in the lake", he says to change the subject which narrowly missed Tavros and Dave.

"At this time of the year?" I ask confused. Who'd ever want that?

"Yeah, he thayth he liked to thwim in a frozen lake at hith old cottage in Finland. He thayth it won't be cold now compared to then", Sollux explains, sounding like he doesn't believe his own words.

"Well that sounds like motherfucking miracles to me", I say smiling and my bro gives I a look of horror.

"What, you mean you'd be willing to go thwim in winter and freeze your ath off?" he asks and I nod slowly.

"Sure, if there would be others", I answer. This is starting to sound like fun.

"I will never underthand you", Sollux says shaking his head lightly and chuckling I finish my food.

I go back to my apartment at around half six. The sound I hear from inside, though, gets me to stop at the door.

"Out", I hear Tavros yell and then there's another voice.

"Fine, I'll go. Don't come crawling back like the cripple you are!"

The owner of the angry voice then bursts out of the door. Dave stops to glare at me for a moment before he continues down the stairs three or four at a time. I stare after him for a second before I enter the apartment to find that Tav isn't anywhere to be seen.

"Tavbro? You all right?" I ask a tad worried and close the door quietly, creeping into the flat.

"Oh god, d-did you h-hear that?" I hear his timid voice from the bedroom and follow it. What I see isn't what I was expecting, even though I don't really know what I was expecting in the first place. Tav is sitting on his bed, sheets all wrinkled, eyes red and shirt tossed somewhere, hugging his chest tightly.

"What did he do?" I ask hands clenching into fists, every muscle tense.

"W-wait, Gamzee, d-don't go do anything s-stupid", he says quickly, eyeing me a bit terrified. "And I'd r-rather not talk, about it, right now."

I relax a bit and carefully sit down next to him, pulling him closer to me and rub his back. At this point he tears up and starts crying, burying his face in my chest, getting my shirt wet. Really I don't care about it. I've got a lot more to worry about, like comforting Tavros.

"W-we b-broke up", he says shakily between sobs and suddenly I understand. Dave must have gone too far. He must have got Tavros all uncomfortable and Tav didn't like it. So that's what was going on.

"It's all right. Everything will turn out all right", I say soothingly and after some time I find that Tav has fallen asleep in my arms.

I lay him back in his bed and pull the covers over his head. For a second the thought of taking his pants off crosses my mind but I immediately dismiss it. That would just freak him out, and probably wake him up too.

So I just get up and go to the kitchen to make him some food for when he wakes up. Something small and light.

And maybe some tee.


	14. Chapter 14

**Have a nother chapter guys! For one reason or another I was really distracted the whole time I was correcting this and it took longer than it should, but I got it done anyways!**

I wake up stiff and still awfully tired. I'm aching all over and I definitely don't feel like getting up. So I simply stay in bed and try to fall asleep.

Only I can't. The images of earlier come back to my mind. Dave. That's why I was crying, wasn't it? I groan and open my eyes ever so slightly. What time was it anyways?

A quarter to six. So I've been asleep for around an hour for what I know. I slowly rub my eyes and sit up, not feeling like getting into my wheelchair. If I wasn't in a wheelchair, if I still had my legs, or even prosthetics I could have avoided that all. I could have ran away when he didn't stop.

Great. Blame it on myself now. With a sigh I look around for my wheelchair. It's so far away I would never reach it from the bed. I don't want to call Gamzee either since he has already done enough by just being there for me.

Another sigh and I slowly get out of the bed and crawl to the wheelchair. It's not actually far from the bed, just barely out of my reach, so it isn't really a big thing to crawl over. I pull myself up with a bit of struggle and smile sadly. I could get into my wheelchair without help, at least.

Maybe I should check how much I've saved and buy a pair of legs? It would be terribly expensive, but they might be handy.

Slowly I decide what to do. I roll my wheelchair over to the computer and start it up, chewing gently on my lower lip at the same time.

When the laptop turns on I decide not to log into Pesterchum. I'll let that wait for a while. Instead I go to YouTube and put on some rap to listen to. I then go surf around on the internet for something to get my mind off of Dave.

I almost jump in surprise when I feel Gamzee's hand gently lower on my shoulder.

"Hey, sorry there bro", he says smiling slightly and puts a tray on my table. I blink at him blankly for a second before looking at the tray. There was some food, a sandwich and tea.

"You, um, made tee?" I ask a bit surprised by his action.

"And food. You might as well munch on that while you're at that miraculous laptop of yours", he says grinning lazily and I smile at him for a second before turning to the computer again.

"Uhh, thanks, Gamzee", I say turning the music a bit louder.

He leaves me at it for the rest of the night and I feel a bit bad that I made him sleep on the couch while listening to music the whole evening. Oh my, it's already one in the morning? And I have school tomorrow, too. Probably should head off to bed.

The next day isn't too good, but it could have been worse. I avoid Dave in school the best I can, actually managing to smile at him when I see him in the cafeteria. John wants to know what happened, but I just tell him the two of us broke up. Nothing special. No one really cares about me now that I'm not dating the cool kid of the school. Maybe I like it better that way. No big bundles of people all around me and Dave the whole time. I get some room this way.

I successfully make it through school and go back to my apartment. Gamzee isn't home yet, and won't be until after five, so I'll either have to order food or make some myself. I don't feel up to the task of cooking so I just order some Chinese food. I really like Chinese food.

The food arrives some time later, I'm not really sure. I pay for it and start eating in the living room while flipping through the channels. The food is spicy and soon I go to the kitchen to get something to drink.

I'm about to take some juice, but reconsider this after spotting the unopened bottle of Redpop Faygo just sitting there. 'Minding its own business' as Gamzee would say. Instead of the juice I go for the Faygo and drink half of it while eating. Hopefully Gamzee won't mind.

Gamzee arrives a little past five. Apparently he has once again driven faster than necessary, but I don't really mind. He greets me and collects my dishes, washing them and making something for himself. After eating he sits down next to me and I watch as his gaze stops on the almost empty bottle of Faygo.

"You all up and drank a bottle of Faygo", he says sounding a bit surprised and smiles a bit. I just nod quietly, grabbing the bottle and gulping down some more. It's not really as awesome as Gamzee always says it is, but I like it nonetheless. "That's motherfucking miracles."

I stare at the TV not really seeing it, just thinking about my break up. It was my first, to be truthful. I had never dated anyone before, not even Vriska who almost forced me into it. Almost being the key word.

Suddenly I feel very weak, just wanting to crawl into bed and fall asleep, as to not think of anything right now. Seeing there is no bed in the living room and I don't really feel like going into my wheelchair I decide I might as well cuddle with Gamzee. He won't mind some brocuddles, would he?

I'm feeling too tired to really care and without asking I crawl into his lap and bury my face in the crook of his neck. He makes a surprised sort of sound, but I don't care. Instead I nuzzle my face deeper and soon feel his arms around me.

I start feeling sleepy after a while, the words coming from the TV never making any sense. I inhale deeply the smell of coffee still lingering on Gamzee after his job and smile a bit. It might just turn out okay. My life, I mean. Gamzee would always be there for me.

Then I start thinking about it. What if Gamzee left? What if he decided to move somewhere? Or what if something happened to him?

A shudder racks through my body and I feel Gamzee's head tilt a bit. I shift a bit so I could see his face and smile a bit. He returns the smile and stays quiet. I don't know what gets Gamzee to do this, as it is against his nature in every way, but I don't care. It's nice and I'm enjoying it. I like to have him there for me and that's just fine.

I actually manage to doze off for a second and am woken by Gamzee carefully moving me out of his lap. I open my eyes and watch as he walks into the kitchen, not noticing me waking up. A small smile spread across my face and I grab a pillow to cuddle. I bury my face in it and smile widely, not really knowing what could make me this happy all of a sudden.

"Gamzee?" I call after a second.

"Yeah, Tavbro?" he asks and comes back with a cup of coffee.

"Oh, I don't think you should, um, drink that this late. It'll just, uhh, keep you up, in the night", I say My smile fading a bit and he smiles.

"Yeah, I think you're probably right", he says, sipping the drink anyways. I just chuckle lightly and remember why I called him.

"Oh yeah, I was wondering, if we could play a board game, or something", I say and he grins widely.

"Anything you want Tav", he says and I can't help but smile. I really have the best of friends.


	15. Chapter 15

**This is the chapter tha originally read "I walk to the room of my door" and yet again it got me to laugh as I read it. I really should have had a beta reader or at least checked these the last time I uploaded them.**

We play a few rounds of chess and I keep on losing. Tav has tried many times to get me to concentrate, but I can't seem to get my mind off of him. I have a second chance. I have a motherfucking second chance!

And this time I won't fail. I'll tell Tav soon. I have to before anyone else does, but it can't be too soon. He's clearly upset about Dave braking up with him.

I jerk out of my thoughts and fall on my back when I notice Tav's face only inches from mine.

"Gamzee, you're not paying attention. I could have thrown the board out of, uhh, the window and you wouldn't have noticed a thing", Tav says and I blink a few times. He must be serious since he's stuttering less than usual.

"Sorry Tavbro, got lost all up in my miraculous thoughts", I say smiling apologetically.

"Oh, what were you thinking about then? If that's not too private, I mean", he says backing up and giving me room to sit up once again.

"Nothin' much, just about... This one person", I say, almost repeating my thoughts aloud.

"Do you, um, have a special someone?" Tavros asks. Why's he being so straight forward now?

"Yeah, I happen to have", I answer grinning widely. I just can't help myself. He looks at me for a second as if pondering whether or not to ask who, but seems to decide against it.

"Want to try some game, um, more to your liking?" he asks and I nod. So this time I'm choosing the game. Probably something easier than this one.

After an hour of playing we both get something to eat before bed. We then go to our shared bedroom and I flop onto my bed on my stomach as Tav gets his laptop onto his bed with him.

I let my mind wonder and start thinking about all the little miracles of life. Well, it's not too miraculous to see Tav like he is right now, closed around himself in his little bed, headphones on and listening to music all upset, but at least I got him to smile a few times today.

Maybe I should tell him right now. How'd I do that? Just break it to him? Or is this too soon after his break-up with Dave? Yes it is. But it would serve Dave right to see Tav in another relationship, one that won't end just like that because even though I have fantasized about it for long now I would go at Tav's pace. If I can keep myself under control that is.

Oh, all the things I'd love to do to him. I'd kiss him, caress him, make him feel good…

Fuck. Motherfuck. Maybe thinking about that right now with Tav on the other side of the room isn't one of my brightest ideas. I don't know what I should really do now. If I get up Tav will most definitely see. But if I don't I'll probably start feeling pretty bad pretty soon. Lucky for me I'm laying on my belly and not on my back.

I only barely notice Tav leave the room, flinching slightly as he says he's going for a drink. After he's gone I sneak up to door of the room and hurry to the bathroom. Why did this keep happening to me? Twice this day!

So I quickly finish what I came to do, wash my hands, flush the toilet and head back to my room.

Tav's already there, all curled up in his bed, probably trying to sleep. I resist the urge to go over there and cuddle him. After standing at the doorway for a few seconds I make my way to my bed. It's probably best I don't do that just yet.

I fall asleep quickly and am woken up by the irritating sound of my alarm. I hate that sound. It's awful, it wakes me up in the middle of miraculous dreams that I want to continue.

But I need to get to work today. Great, just what I need. I lay on the bed for another five minutes before moving, sitting up and glancing at Tav's bed. Apparently he's already up. I quietly wonder if he got any sleep at all last night, but dismiss those thoughts as I grab a pair of pants and head to the kitchen.

Soon enough I find myself eating a sandwich while searching for my phone, which I'm sure I left in my room last night, but apparently didn't. Angry with myself for losing it I ask Tav if he'd borrow his phone so I can call my own and find the phone under my bed.

"Thanks, bro", I say returning Tav's phone.

"No problem", he says rather quietly.

"You all right?" I ask as I shove my phone into my pockets and finish my sandwich.

"Yes, I'm fine", he says barely giving me a smile. Probably worrying about seeing Dave again today. Yes, that's what he's thinking. He's thinking about Dave.

"That's great, but you're not really all up and happy looking. Wanna skip school today?" I ask as I rummage around the hall to find my keys.

"Oh no! That would be, uhh, wrong!" he says this like I suggested for him to go jump on a trampoline without his legs.

"Sorry, just and idea", I say chuckling a bit and shove my keys with my phone. I then find a long-sleeved purple shirt and add some make-up to my face.

I remember Kanaya once told me not to put my make-up on since it scared away all the younger customers. After giving a quick thought to this I take the clown mask off and stare at my naked face.

I'll definitely keep my make-up on anytime I can, this feels so stupid.

I message Karkat to see if he's up already, say good bye to Tavros and leave to fetch Karkat. I think this day will turn out all right.

After a short walk I open Karkat's door and walk in like I owned the place. I find Karkat in the kitchen this time with a cup of coffee in his hand and laugh.

"What's so funny dumbass?" Karkat asks not even looking at me, rubbing at his eyes.

"You're drinking that miraculous shit even as we're going to a shop where you'd get some for free from me", I say rolling my eyes and he looks at me.

"Where the hell did you leave your make-up?" he asks his expression going weird for a second or two.

"At home. Thought I'd do as Kanaya asked me to", I say shrugging it off, but he won't stop staring at my face. "What, isn't it good? You're the one always nagging about it and shit, bro."

"What? No, it's fine", he says blushing slightly and I grin.

"No need to get all embarrassed for staring. I do it all the time", I say and grab his arm, pulling him up. "Now let's go or I'll be late."


	16. Chapter 16

**I'm really sorry for them acting so out of character, I really am. But hey, I tried.**

The bus ride to school seems to last only a few seconds and before I know it John is running to me with Karkat on his heels.

"Tavros! How are you?" John asks smiling like every day. He, though, isn't panting like Karkat is.

"Uhh, nice, I guess", I answer. John doesn't really seem to care for what I answered, and secretly I'm glad for no more questions. Instead he starts rambling on and on about a game he saw yesterday. I'm pretty sure he mentioned something about it being a rerun from last year.

I follow the two to the school. John walks with me to my class and continues to his own class from there. Karkat comes a bit later after being held back by Terezi. He sits down on the floor next to me and we wait for the teacher.

"So, have you gotten over that fucker already?" he asks suddenly and it takes me a few seconds to realize what he's talking about. Then I notice Dave farther in the hall.

"Oh, u-um, I, don't know", I stutter and turn my gaze down.

"Would a new relationship help with it?" Karkat asks turning his gaze to my slightly blushed face.

"What?" I ask staring at him. "W-what do you, uh, mean with that?"

"Just thinking. It helps sometimes. And I know-" he cuts himself short there like he was going to tell me something but decided against it.

"You know what?" I ask, now curious. What could Karkat know, that he didn't want to tell me?

"Shut the fuck up! I'm not supposed to say it. Not to you at least", he snaps and I stare at him.

"Karkat, that's, uh, kind of rude", I say quietly and look down.

"Fuck. I didn't mean it like that. It's a secret, okay? My friends. Not supposed to fucking be talking about it. Like I am now. Fuck fuck fucking god damnit!" he starts rambling and I sort of tune out. A secret of his friends I'm not supposed to hear? It just makes me more curious.

"Oh, there's the teacher, thank god", he says and gets up filing into the classroom with the other students.

School goes by quickly and I'm glad for that. I haven't really seen Dave, only in the one class we share. But I haven't really seen anyone that much. It's sort of lonely, but I don't mind. They would probably feel sorry for me and ask how I'm getting on or something. I get enough pity as it is, and I don't really like it. It never did anything good to my self-esteem either.

I go to get some food from the cafeteria and find John there with Karkat, Dave, Nepeta, Rose and a few others. I take my place next to them, at the edge of the table.

"Hi Tav!" John says cheerily and I smile at him.

"Hi John", I say and a few greetings are exchanged. I glance at Dave and lock eyes with him for a second before he looks to John, who's talking to him.

"So, I heard you're dating some girl now", John says leaning closer to Dave. "Is this true?"

"Yeah, caught her staring and she's not that bad looking either", Dave answers blankly.

"You're such a player Dave! This is just like when we lived in the same neighborhood in Washington!" John scolds him and Rose says something, too.

"Shut up. I can do what I want", Dave snaps and I look up.

"Like force me into doing something I don't want to?" I ask and everyone goes quiet. They just stare at me, John open-mouthed and Dave actually looking taken aback. I pick up my tray, not feeling like eating anymore and leave the cafeteria having had around two bites of my food. This would come back at me later, but I can get food at my place.

"Tav! Hey Tav, wait!" I hear and slow down, not really wanting to stop. I look back and see John arrive next to me grabbing my chair and stopping me. I turn around and look up at him.

"What?" I ask, crossing my arms. I don't feel like talking.

"Just wanted to say, if you want to talk about what Dave did, you can talk to me about it. I know he's… Quiet straight forward and all that", John says kneeling down in front of me. "You can talk to any of your closest friends. They'll understand and it'll make you feel better."

"Yeah, I'll talk when I'm ready", I answer almost as a whisper and John nods.

"Try to make it through school, maybe we could hang out afterwards", he says smiling and returns to his friends. I continue to my next class. Oh how I wish I could already be home. At least Gamzee's there. He's probably the best friend I've ever had. He would understand, wouldn't he?

After a rather tiring afternoon I make my way to the bus to get home. I take out my cell and hesitate a bit before texting Gamzee.

adiosToreador began pestering terminallyCapricious [TC]

AT: wHEN WILL YOU GET HOME?

TC: iN hAlF aN hOuR.

TC: wHy?

AT: cOULD YOU, uHH, pICK UP SOME FOOD ON THE WAY HOME, pOSSIBLY?

TC: sUrE tHiNg TaVbRo.

TC: wHaT wOuLd YoU lIkE?

AT: aNYTHING, rEALLY, aS LONG AS IT'S, uHH, eDIBLE,

TC: sOmE mOtHeRfUcKiNg EdIbLe FoOd CoMiNg Up In HaLf An HoUr ;o)

AT: tHANKS,,,

adiosToreador ceased pestering terminallyCapricious [TC]

I get off the bus and go to the elevator. The nice old lady from my floor is there too and greets me with a smile.

"Hello little Tavros! How was school today?" she asks.

"It, uhh, was all right", I answer, resisting the urge to add 'I guess' to the end. It would make her worry and she doesn't need that.

"How nice! How about I bake cookies today and drop some off at your apartment? You could give some to your... Friend too", she says with a sweet smile and I can't see why to say no.

"That would be very, um, nice of you", I say and the elevator stops. I let her get out first and follow behind, saying good bye and unlocking my apartment's door. I close it behind me and wheel to the living room. I put my bag down next to wall and pull myself onto the couch, laying there and reach for the remote. I barely reach it but manage to grab it and turn on the TV, flipping through the channels till Gamzee comes.

"You here, Tavbro?" he asks and I listen to him walking around the kitchen with his food supplies.

"Yeah", I answer after a silent moment and the moving stops.

"Barely heard that. You need to speak louder next time", he says and I hear a playful honk from one of his weird horns. I usually bring them to his bed when he leaves them around. Why hadn't I noticed that one?

Oh well. I don't really mind them that much and there's such a delicious smell coming from the kitchen. I decide it's best to get myself off the couch and into the kitchen. It will definitely be easier to eat there.


	17. Chapter 17

**Here, have some John's POV for a change :)**

After the small incident in the cafeteria I pull Dave away from the others and look at him hard.

"What have you done to him?" I ask all serious business like.

"Nothin'. I wanted to have some fun, he kicked me out, we broke up", Dave answers cool as ever.

"No, did you try to force him into something?" I ask sternly.

"No, why would I?" he asks shrugging.

"I am not buying this, Dave. I know you did something!" I say now angry.

"Come on, John, what are you? His babysitter? Big brother? That's right, you barely know him. He doesn't want people to act like you do", Dave says coldly and I stare at him.

"What do you mean he doesn't want people to help?" I ask dumbfounded.

"He doesn't want your pity, that's what I mean", Dave says, turns around and walks off to some of his other friends.

"What happened?" I hear Karkat behind me and turn around to him, smiling.

"Dave got mad at me. Nothing special", I answer chuckling and Karkat stares at me like I'm walking on water or something. "What?"

"Dave got mad at you? Dave fucking Strider got mad at you and you got through it with only a few harsh words? What are you, a god?" he asks and I chuckle again.

"Come on, he's not that bad", I say and Karkat shakes his head.

"He's just that bad", he answers and I punch his arm lightly. "What was that for?"

"Don't shout Karkitty", I tease and I notice the blush creeping from under his turtleneck sweater.

"Never. Call me. Karkitty. Again", he breathes out, sounding very angry and embarrassed.

"How about Karkles, then?" I ask and he snaps at me to shut up. I keep on teasing him until I'm let into the classroom where we are forced to sit on different sides of the room.

After school Karkat comes over to my place. I catch Bec before he can tackle Karkat. Karkat, like Dave, seems frightened by the dog.

"What the ever-loving fuck is that?" he squeaks.

"It's Jade's dog, Becquerel", I answer and pull the dog away. "Jade! Come get Bec! He's after Karkitty!" I yell and Karkat growls something from behind me. Jade yells something about no time now so I sigh and hold onto the dog while Karkat slips up the stairs and go there after him, Bec on my heels.

"So what breed is it?" he asks sitting on a chair with Bec's head on his lap.

"Oh, it's mixed. It has something from a German Shepherd and an Irish Wolfhound. Then I think it has a bit of Golden Retriever, too, or some retriever at least. It loves to fetch. Oh yeah, of course. It's mother is a wolf", I say and I see Karkat tense up. He quickly pushes Bec's head off his lap and yanks his legs onto the chair, pulling them against his chest.

"Come on! He's really nice!" I laugh and Karkat stares at me. "Here Bec!"

"Tell me again how you've managed to stay alive", he retorts and I laugh, scratching Bec behind the ear.

"Bec wouldn't hurt a human", I say smiling widely.

"Can he like, do tricks, or something?" Karkat asks not letting go of his feet.

"Jade taught him something. Um, I think I might have some treats for him here, if he hasn't found them already", I say rummaging through my room, finding a hidden bag of dog treats. Bec's already jumping up against me and I have to push him down to be able to do anything.

"Bec, sit", I say and the dog obediently sits down.

"Down", I say and Bec lay's down on the floor.

I go through the tricks Bec knows, making him roll over, beg, give me his paw and the one I love the most.

"Hand's up", I say, pointing my fingers at the dog like pistols. He puts his front paws into the air and I grin. "Bam!" and Bec falls down on his back, not moving.

"Good dog!" I praise and he gets up to get his treat. "Now where's Jade? Go find Jade!"

Bec excitedly runs from the room and I close the door, smiling.

"That's... Cool... I guess. The last one was nice. How the fuck do you get a dog to do that?" Karkat asks.

"You really should ask Jade that. She gets him to do all sorts of weird things like count and fetch items", I say. Karkat's expression was definitely worth seeing and I burst out laughing at it, which makes Karkat get up and slap me behind the head.

"Ow! That hurt! Karkaaat~" I whine and he growls, sitting down next to me. I smile widely.

"Watcha wanna do?" I ask and he shrugs.

"Something we can do in here without the fucking demon dog from hell", Karkat answers and my smile widens.

"Is Karkitty afraid?" I retort and he punches me rather hard on the arm. "Fine, fine, I'll stop."

"You better do, or you'll lose your arm", he snaps. I chuckle and look at him.

"You know, I've been rather curious. You have this nice little group of friends. What's there now, around 14 not counting the two of us? So I wanna know who are with who", I suggest and he glances at me.

"Well, I don't really know. I think Kanaya and Rose have something, but I'm not sure. Eridan and Feferi are together, that I'm sure of. Not like Eridan would let anyone else even try. I think Nepeta likes me. Her cousin Equius likes Aradia. They'll probably end up together. Terezi seems to like Dave. We used to be dating, Terezi and I. Then there's... Um... Sollux has liked many of us, but right now I don't know of him. And Dave and Tavros just broke up. That must have been a first time for Tavros. And Gamzee likes Tavros. Wait, fuck. I shouldn't have said that", Karkat curses under his breath and starts bitching at himself.

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone", I promise and he looks at me like he doesn't really know if to trust me or not.

"Promise?" he asks.

"Promise", I say smiling. "So Gamzee likes our little Tavros. That's sort of cool. I think Gamzee has some chances. He's pretty good looking, though I wouldn't date him", I say. Karkat looks at me like he's asking why not. And so he does.

"Why not?" he asks.

"Because I'm not a homosexual", I answer and he looks like he's going to choke. He turns his head coughing and I quickly run some water from downstairs.

"Are you all right?" I worry, standing there in front of him.

"Yes, I'm fan-fucking-tastic. Just about choked there", he answers sarcastically and I chuckle.

"I think Dave was right. You can be so grumpy when you want to."


	18. Chapter 18

**Last one for today, hoping to get some up tomorrow too.**

I suddenly wake up to something, I'm not really sure what. I search for my clock, but can't find it. I rub my eyes with the back of my hand and pick up my phone from the table. I look at the bright numbers. It's 1.30 in the morning.

So what could have woken me up?

I fall back into my bed and close my eyes, wrapping myself into my blankets. Maybe I just had a weird dream. I must have imagined it.

I'm about to fall asleep again, but something gets my attention. It's small, barely noticeable, but it's definitely there.

I turn around to look at Gamzee. He's on his stomach, head turned towards me and limbs sprawled out in weird angles.

"Taav", he whines in a barely audible voice. Is he talking in his sleep?

"Don't, Tav. Don't tease", he mumbles and I can't make out the next sentence. Then I hear him whine softly.

Oh wait. No. No way. Nonono NO! He isn't just having a dream about me, is he?

I listen for a few seconds without hearing anything. Then he turns onto his side facing me, one hand in front of his head, the other near his waist.

"Ungh, Tavros", he moans. I stare at him, not able to think straight. Then he turns around and goes quiet.

I stare at his back for a minute before turning around. Looking at his bushy black hair won't help me fall asleep again. No chance with that. But his image is stuck in my head. His expression while saying my name. Wait, I think I know what he dreamt of.

It takes me a while to fall asleep again. I can't get Gamzee out of my head.

Eventually, though, I fall asleep and have the weirdest dream of my life. I wake up to my alarm and momentarily forget the dream, what ever it was about. I pull my wheelchair over and pick up my alarm clock from the floor. I then pull some clothes to change into and roll out of my room.

In the kitchen I see Gamzee slowly drinking some orange juice and freeze. My dream comes rushing back to me. It hits me so hard I can't move for a few seconds.

"Tav, are you all right?" he asks this like he did something wrong.

"Oh, what? N-no, I-I just remembered, uhh, my dream from last night. It was weird", I answer and roll to the counters getting the ingredients for my tee. "Did you have any dreams last night?"

Glancing at him from the corner of my eye I notice him tense. Yes, I had guessed right. I'm curious though, if he'll admit anything. Which I guess he probably won't.

"Umm, a pretty weird dream", he says slowly.

"Oh. What was it about?" I ask casually and continue making my tee. While waiting for the water to heat up I grab something to make a sandwich out of.

"I can't really remember", he answers sitting down at the table with his drink still half full in his hand. "What about you?"

"Um, it was very weird. I was in a forest, and then, uhh, you came there. And we ran through the forest to a mountain, and uhh, if I remember right, we flew up to the top and played with some bears and animals living there", I explain. Yes, that's excactly my dream.

What? Did you maybe expect something more? All I have said is I had a weird dream.

So I continue making breakfast and eat it rather quickly, excusing myself to go pack my bag for school.

"Do you ever miss school?" I ask Gamzee as he watches me come back.

"Nah, never liked that place. Full of all those miracle destroying adults an' stuff", he says grinning a bit and I smile.

"Well, they can't help it. It's, uhh, their job", I explain, even though explaining things to Gamzee isn't usually all that helpful. He never understands it anyways.

"Guess you're right", he says and gets up from the sofa. "I'll be going now. Gotta grab Karbro on the way", he says smiling. "See ya later Tavbro."

I watch him leave and sighing go to the TV. There are our consoles. There's a Wii and an X-Box 360. I play the X-Box a lot more, since most of the Wii games include moving a lot. Like Just Dance, or something like that. Though I do enjoy watching Gamzee dance. He's pretty good at it.

After waiting around for most of my free time thinking about Gamzee I leave for the bus stop. It would be awful to be late for the bus.

I go down the elevator, not seeing anyone on my way. It's like everyone is still sleepingor something. They're not out, at least I know that.

At the bus stop I see someone I didn't want to see. Vriska is standing there, even though her stop is later on.

"Hello Taaaaaaaavros!" she yells, waving her arm at me. I hesitate, but approach her and she leans down on me, putting her hands next to my head.

"Long time no see. Watcha doin' all alone? Don't have friends to come with you?" she asks grinning like a maniac.

"Um, I have friends. T-they just live a bit farther, or closer, to the, uhh, school", I say quietly.

"Oh, I see. So you're like what, forever alone or something?" she says and grins again. "I heard Dave left you."

What? Did Dave tell the others he left me? Oh no, this is going too far.

"I left Dave", I say and Vriska blinks.

"Excuse me? I thought I heard you say you left Dave", she says sneering and straightens up.

"Um, y-yes. I broke up with, him", I say backing up a bit, not able to look at Vriska.

"You're such a dork, did you know?" she asks and doesn't say anything to me after that. God am I glad for that.


	19. Chapter 19

**I love writing in Gamzee's POV you don't even know. I wish I could write this whole story like this, but no, I think it's better off like this. And I enjoy writing in everyone elses POV too, though I don't know how I do with most of them.**

**Anyway, enjoy!**

Tav usually doesn't ask about my dreams. Sure, he likes talking about his own dreams, and usually they have me in them, one way or another, but he doesn't really ask about my dreams. Maybe he thinks I dream of something awful? That wouldn't be nice.

God do I wish I wasn't speaking in my dreams. It's not something I want Tav to hear.

"Fuckass, wake up", I hear someone growl next to me. Oh yeah, I'm with Karkat in the cafe before anyone is there yet.

"Sorry, bro. Got distracted for a bit", I answer with my trademark grin.

"You're always distracted", he huffs and crosses his arms to get more warmth.

"Bro, it's not that chilly in here", I say stifling a laugh.

"Yes it is. It's fucking freezing. I'm freezing like a rat on the north pole", he says and I chuckle.

"I'll get you a cup of that wicked coffee to warm you all up", I say and he rolls his eyes, tugging the zipper of his hoodie as far up as it goes before curling into himself again.

I go to the kitchen and start working on the coffee. I then notice Kanaya is there.

"Hello sis", I greet with a smile and she returns it.

"Nice to see you too", she says all formal and shit, like always.

"How's it going with your dad?" I ask. Her dad is the true owner of the shop. Kanaya is only a year older than me. Most of the people don't really notice that with how grown up she always acts.

"Not too well. We had an argument yesterday. He was saying something about firing me", she says the smile fading a bit.

"Aw, shit. That's not fun", I say frowning. "Gotta turn that frown of yours upside down!"

Kanaya smiles at me and thanks me before going to serve the first customer of the day. I finish my free coffee, which I bring to Karkat, since I, like already mentioned, am not a big fan of coffee. Sure it gets me all warm and bright at times, but it doesn't taste all that miraculous.

I sit down across from him and watch as he sips his coffee, one hand still around his body.

"Wow, Karbro, you must really be cold", I say chuckling and he glares at me.

"It's not like everyone is a freak like you who doesn't feel a fucking thing", he snaps back and I lean back like I'm hurt by his words.

"That hurt", I say and he growls, which makes me chuckle again.

"One more laugh and I'll rip your fucking mouth off. Let's see how you laugh then", he says and I smile, shaking my head.

"I think that would all up and scare the customers away. And that would be the opposite of a miracle", I say.

"Your make-up scares already half of them away", he points out.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Kanaya is always blabbing about it. Says I should all up and leave it out of work", I say thoughtfully.

"You better", he says and finishes his coffee. "I need to go. I don't want to be late one more fucking time because of this."

"Of course my fine ass brother", I say and he stares at me for a second. I chuckle and he flips me off. "Oh, mind doing me one favor?"

"What is it now, fucktard?" he sighs getting up.

"Keep an eye on Tav", I say walking to the counter.

"You say that like I never do", he notes before leaving.

I'm left to serve customers with Kanaya for the whole day, which efficiently gets my mind off of Tavros probably hearing me talking in my sleep. The day is soon over, though, and I return home in my old pickup van. I didn't really get much from my father even if he did have money. Still has.

I come home and make some food for me and Tav. Tav is talking again, like he finally got over Dave. Which happened really quickly thinking it was only a few days ago they broke up. I thought it would take longer. And I'm not sure Tav is over it yet.

"Hey Tav, mind if I ask you a question?" I ask carefully and he looks at me quizzically.

"Go ahead", he gives me permission and I hesitate.

"It's about you and Dave", I start and he tenses a bit before relaxing.

"Yeah?"

"Well, have you got over it yet?" I ask still not sure I'm supposed to ask.

"Uhm, well, mostly, yeah", he answers playing with his food slightly.

"Oh, that was fast", I say a bit surprised. Well my first time didn't take that long either, but it took it's time..

"Well, I can't say I've liked Dave, uh, before we started dating. Not really like that, at least", he admits.

"So why'd you start dating then?" I ask pondering when I'll cross the line.

"Ohh, um, it might or might not have, uh, something to do with getting to know Dave. Like on our first date. It went well, and he was nice, and uhh, I don't know. I guess, I just felt like it", he says stuttering a bit.

"What did he do to get you so upset?" Shit. Now I crossed the line.

"I'd rather not talk about that", he says quietly looking down. The silence stretches for a few minutes until we both are finished with our food.

"Hey, I've got an idea", he says suddenly as I'm putting the dishes away.

"Throw it at me bro", I say after getting the table clean.

"Could we play Just Dance 3 today?" he asks and I turn around rather quicker than usual. Tav doesn't really like watching me play too often. I know he doesn't mind watching me dance, but it also gets him a bit depressed since he can't do it.

"If you want to", I answer with a smile and his wide smile is enough of an answer to me. Of course I'll play if I'll see that smile more often.


	20. Chapter 20

**Two updates today. Not too bad. We're nearing half way here!**

I watch as Gamzee dances to the songs I tell him to, including Party Rock Anthem, Barbra Streisand and other songs. Usually he passes them with five stars, getting hi-scores on some of them. I watch him as he dances and think about last night. I then think about what Karkat said.

Maybe a new relationship with someone would help me? And maybe, just maybe Karkat was going to tell who would have been interested. Was someone interested in me?

Wait a second. Something clicked in my head. Karkat was going to tell me about someone interested in me, one of my friends. Which friend's secret would Karkat care for that much? I link this with what I heard last night and facepalm.

Gamzee glances at me, missing a few moves, finishes the song and turns to me.

"What now bro? Something wrong?" he asks worriedly.

"N-no! Nothing! Nothing at all!" I say rather quickly and he tilts his head, not buying it.

"Really Tav, what is it?" he asks taking a step towards me.

"J-just realized I have some homework to be done", I cover up with the first thing that comes to my mind.

"Huh, really?" Gamzee asks sitting down next to me. "Well, I don't feel like playing anymore."

"I'm not, uhh, forcing you", I say and he smiles, taking the game out of the Wii and putting it away.

"What now?" he asks and I ponder things for a second. What could we do?

"I think I, uhh, might want to do the homework to, um, get it out of the way", I say and he nods, flipping on the TV.

I escape to our room and pull out the homework I was originally going to do on Sunday. Maybe I should really do them.

I start on the homework I have been assigned to do, but can't think straight. All I can think of is Gamzee might like me as more than a best friend and I don't know if it's true. Now that I think about it, he does act a bit too friendly around me. Always a bit... Clingy, perhaps?

Oh god, how stupid could I have been? It doesn't take an idiot to notice how protective Gamzee is around me, or how much he does for me. He knows I have the strength to wheel myself around but he pushes me instead. He helps me get in and out of my wheelchair when I'm perfectly capable of doing it myself.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. That's what I must be. But do I have feelings for him? That I'll have to think of some more. But now, the homework. I can't just return them empty, and if I do them now I won't have to later.

I finish my homework, but it takes me almost an hour. I sigh in relief and pull out some paper from my desk, sketching something on it. It looks painfully close to two people holding hands on a hill.

I continue the sketch and it starts to have a sunset as the background. I stare at it, deciding whether or not to draw myself and Gamzee on it. Well, why not go for it? See what I think of it.

I start the other as myself. Drawing my Mohawk from behind is terribly hard, but not impossible. I don't think of myself as a good artist, but it's not half bad to speak the truth. I quickly finish the sketch of myself and look at the one next to. I can already see the Gamzee's bushy hair there.

"Who's the other gonna be?" Gamzee asks and I turn around so quickly I almost fall off my wheelchair.

"Woah! Easy there! Just me", Gamzee says grabbing my hand and keeping me up.

"D-don't scare me like that!" I squeak not getting anything else out. How could I tell him I was thinking of drawing him? Oh, now I know how Gamzee must feel all the time.

"Sorry, sorry. So who were ya gonna draw. You drew yourself pretty good", he says peering over me at the picture.

"I haven't really decided yet", I say. Well, it's half true anyway. "Any suggestions?"

I watch his face closely and it looks like he has an idea of who, but doesn't say it. Instead he starts thinking about it some more.

"Nah, not really. Do as your heart tells you, Tavbro", he says smiling. "Want some juice?"

"Would you, possibly, get some for me?" I ask turning around and starting to sketch the clothes.

"Of course I would", Gamzee answers and I hear him leave the room.

I quickly sketch the clothes and move on to the hair. It doesn't take too long from the angle of the picture, since nothing much usually is on the backs of two people. So I finish rather quickly and start inking the lines. After erasing every useless thing, leaving the uncolored picture there I smile. I look around the room to see Gamzee on his bed with one cup in his hand, half empty, and the other is on his bedside table.

"Want the drink now?" he asks smiling and I nod. He grabs it and brings it to me, peaking at my drawing.

"Woah, dude, is that me?" he asks, looking stunned.

"Uh, yeah. I hope, it's not too bad", I say timidly, smiling a bit.

"No shit, bro, that's awesome!" Gamzee says grinning.

"You think so?" I ask looking up at him. He's looking at my picture like it's something that will save him from the cruelties of the world.

"Motherfucking yes", he smiles and empties his own glass. "I'm gonna go put this back."

He leaves me to color the picture and I get this feeling he just fist pumped the air and jumped at the same time. Well, maybe I guessed right. Now to just tell Gamzee I might even feel the same way.

I already have the gratest of ideas for it. All I need is some time, paper and colors.

I drink the juice Gamzee brought me and start sketching a new picture. If I'm right, and he has feelings for me, then he most definitely will like this picture, even if I can't really draw too well.


	21. Chapter 21

**I will be starting the sequel probably right after this one, so hopefully no break at this point.**

**And about the changes, no, I don't change anything major, but I do hange some little things and add a bit. I don't think there will be anything major if you don't feel like re-reading this.**

My name is Gamzee and wow it's a long time I thought about it that way.

I just fist pumped the air, so happy. Tav drew a picture of me and him. Holding hands. There might be chances for me after all.

The evening goes by rather quickly as I enjoy myself, almost dancing around the apartment. I feel like I just got my second chance. Of course I already got my second chance, but now I have hope.

I try to calm down by thinking of what I want to do tomorrow. I have work, so that's what I'll start with. I can't get Karkat, since it's Saturday and he'll probably sleep late. Maybe I could go to the library afterwards to check if Sollux is there. And then I would most definitely come home to spend time with Tav. If he is home, that is.

My thoughts start wondering and I almost fall asleep on the sofa. I snap back to reality after hearing Tav's voice next to me.

"Uhh, are you going to, like, sleep on the sofa again?" he asks and I turn my head to see him better.

"Nah, I think I prefer the bed", I answer lazily, getting up and walking to my room. I pull off my shirt and pants and slip under the covers, even though it's not too late. I just can't stand being awake with these thoughts in my head.

So I fall asleep after a bit of trying and wake up early in the morning, not really sure what time it is. Besides, I'm feeling weird. And it's an oddly familiar feeling.

I quietly get out of bed and walk to the bathroom, examining my face. I look like I haven't slept in ages, or eaten for that matter. Holy shit, what has happened?

I stare at myself for a while, but when I blink the image is gone and I'm back to normal. I try to get my thoughts back in track. I'm just tired, that's it. I'm tired and imagining things.

I search the closet for my pills and take a few out. I swallow them dry and stare at my reflection until I'm sure it's not going to jump at me if I turn around. Then I leave the room and go to the kitchen. The clock there tells I it's 1 a.m. I groan quietly and sit down by the table, crossing my arms and resting my head on them. I definitely need more sleep.

I don't notice myself falling asleep by the table and are woken up by my nightmare, sweating and panting. It was awful, I can't believe I dreamt about something like that. Oh god, no. Please no. That dream was horrible.

I check the time and it's about three a.m. I watch the time tick away, unable to fall asleep again. The image of Tavros's decapitated head keeps popping up in my mind. I shiver at the thought of killing my lovely little bro.

Quietly I go back to my room and walk over to Tavros's bed. He's sleeping there, beautiful as ever and I smile. I sit down in his chair and rest my head on my hands once again, staring at him. There I fall asleep and see no bad dreams, but instead I'm woken by Tavros slightly nudging my shoulder.

"Hey Gamzee, how'd you, uhh, get there?" he asks from his wheelchair. He's shorter than me when he is in his wheelchair, even if I'm not even sitting straight. That makes me kind of sad.

"I sat down here and fell asleep", I say a bit groggily. Tav looks at me eyes wide and for a second the image of his bloody head replaces his real one. I jerk back and fall of the chair, hitting my head on the edge of the table on my way.

"Ow, god damnit!" I shout rubbing my head and sitting up.

"G-gamzee! A-are you all right? W-what happened?" I hear Tav stuttering and look up at him. He's taller than me for once.

"Urgh, I don't know. I just got scared by... Something. I don't know", I say closing my eyes as I rub my head. There will probably be a bump there soon. God that hurt.

"R-really?" he asks worry clear in his eyes and it pains me to see him looking at me like that. So caring and loving. Wait what? He's not looking at me lovingly. What am I thinking?

"I'm fine, just need something", I say heaving myself up from the floor with the help of my attacker, the table.

"I'll make you some tea", Tavros offers and wheels himself out of the room. Yes, tea to calm my nerves. Sounds fantastic.

I fetch some medicine for the aching in my head and grab a few pills for my anger problems while I'm at it. I seriously am starting to think those images and dreams have something to do with my issues. Why else would I have such a violent dream? So I down the medicines with some water and stagger slightly as I walk to the kitchen.

"I don't think you look too well", Tavros says as he puts my tea on the table. I sip it lightly to taste how hot it is. Too hot to drink yet.

"It hurts a bit, but other than that I'm fine", I say, smiling a bit, which doesn't turn out too well.

"Maybe you should, uhh, leave the make-up off today, and, uhh, restrain from too much work", he suggests. He must have noticed I would definitely not skip work today.

"Hmm, probably a good motherfucking idea", I reply and sip the tea again. It's still hot and burns my throat as I swallow, but I can't stand it just being there like it doesn't give a shit about the world.

I follow Tav with my eyes as he goes around the kitchen rather expertly, getting things for me to eat like cereal and bread. He must be trying to fill me to the point of bursting or something, since usually I wouldn't eat this much.

On the other hand, my head is still hurting and I don't feel like resisting, so I go with it. I eat what Tav makes me and it's actually pretty good. He even gets me some fresh clothes to wear.

"You know I could have motherfucking got up and got those myself", I say a bit flustered that Tav is doing so much for me now.

"Oh, uhh, yes, I know. I just wanted to help", he says smiling and I smile back. I take the clothes and pull them on. After that I find my keys and phone and ruffle Tav's Mohawk as a good bye.

"See you after work!" I say grinning and he waves me off.

He's been so sweet today. I can't help but wonder what he's up to. Maybe something really nice that we'll both like.


	22. Chapter 22

**Another update! I think we're making progress guys!**

I continue the drawing after Gamzee leaves. I'm sort of worried for him, but I let that be for a while and continue to draw in hopes the finished work will improve his mood. I'm hoping I'll finish it today, but I wouldn't mind it taking a bit longer. Tomorrow would be a good day too.

I waste almost three hours just for drawing the picture. It's hard, and I have to look up many pictures on the net to get it to look close to right. I haven't really drawn anything like this, neither done much of it, but I hope it doesn't look terrible.

I let the drawing be for a while to eat and think. I make something small and easy for myself and stare at the unfinished picture while thinking. So, Gamzee must have some feelings for me. And I know I could definitely have some for him. Maybe it would help me get over Dave better if I were dating Gamzee? I seriously don't know.

It's not like Gamzee isn't good looking. I know he was pretty popular for his looks in school, and I admit I thought he was kind of hot the first time I met him. We just sort of became friends and I never thought about dating him after that. Neither did I think it possible for him to like me as more than a friend.

I pick up my phone and open my Pesterchum on it. I check if Karkat's online and start a chat with him.

adiosToreador began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]

AT: uHH, hEY KARKAT,

CG: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT?

AT: i WAS WONDERING, uM, iF GAMZEE HAD ANY FEELINGS FOR ME?

AT: lIKE MORE THAN IN, uHH, A FRIENDS WAY,

CG: HOW THE FUCK WOULD I KNOW?

AT: yOU'RE HIS BEST FRIEND, SO I, uM, tHOUGHT HE MIGHT, uHH, tELL YOU, oR SOMETHING,

CG: YES HE WOULD.

AT: sO DOES HE? yOU SORT OF LET IT, uHH, sLIP, aT SCHOOL,

CG: FUCK ME.

CG: FUCK MY LIFE PLEASE.

CG: GOD DAMNIT.

AT: oHH, sO HE HAS?

CG: CONGRATU-FUCKING-LATIONS ON FIGURING IT OUT.

CG: TOOK YOU FUCKING LONG ENOUGH.

AT: gOOD,

CG: GOOD WHAT?

CG: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU PLANNING?

AT: i WAS WONDERING, uMM, iF I SHOULD LIKE, aSK HIM OUT,

CG: …

CG: ARE YOU BEING SERIOUS?

CG: ARE YOU REALLY FUCKING GOING TO ASK?

AT: wELL, uMM, i THINK i AM,

CG: OH JOY.

CG: JUST DON'T BREAK HIS HEART OR I'LL HAVE TO HELP A SAD JUGGALO OUT OF HIS MISERY.

AT: nO NEED TO, uH, wORRY }:)

CG: GOD I HATE THAT SMILEY.

CG: THE TWO OF YOU ARE LIKE PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER OR SOMETHING.

CG: BOTH AS ANNOYING.

CG: GOD!

carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased pestering adiosToreador

I smile at the text. I was right. Gamzee liked me, Karkat just confirmed it and it's probably not that bad of an idea to give the picture to Gamzee. Karkat approved of the idea of you guys dating, so he must think it's ok. Great!

I use the new energy I found and continue drawing. The picture itself isn't too detailed, but it works for me. Next up to ink the lines and then color it.

Almost two hours later I smile at the finished picture. God did it take long to draw! I'm still happy with it, so I wheel to my room and hide it in my desk. When I'll give it to Gamzee is still a mystery, but I might have some sort of idea.

After a while Gamzee comes home. I have been thinking of what I've done today and end up in it being me drawing for most of the time. What could I tell Gamzee if he asked? I couldn't spoil this one for him. Not now.

"Sup, Tavbro?" he asks with a half-empty bottle of Faygo in hand.

"Um, nothing much. Just, uh, chilling", I say grinning a bit and he chuckles.

"So watcha want for dinner?" he asks downing most of his Faygo.

"I don't know. Something good", I say and smile. "Surprise me!"

Gamzee chuckles again and I smile. It's so easy to get him to laugh. He has an adorable laugh, now that I think of it. It's deep, but still so friendly.

"All right, I'll come up with something", he says and retreats to the kitchen.

When Gamzee's ready he calls me to the kitchen. It seems like he has made some sort of soup.

"Chicken soup. Don't know if you'll like it, but I definitely do!" he says grinning and I smile. I wheel to my place at the table and Gamzee gives me a plate of his soup. I take the spoon and blow on the hot soup before tasting it.

"Wow, this is good!" I say and take some more. The taste is new, I can't remember eating chicken soup before, but it's definitely not bad. I could eat this more often.

We chit chat about lots of random stuff during dinner and I sort of want to turn the conversation towards feelings, but don't know how. Then it hits me. I'll let Gamzee know I trust him.

He gets up and puts away my dishes. We both fall into a silence, not saying anything.

"Wanna watch some TV?" Gamzee asks and I nod slightly. The couch works for me.

I could of course have gotten there by myself but Gamzee doesn't even wait for me to do anything. He grabs the handles of my wheelchair and wheels me to the living room, helping me onto the couch.

"I could have, uhh, done that myself", I say blushing slightly and Gamzee chuckles.

"No need to tire your arms, Tavbro", he says and I smile a bit, the smile faltering while I collect courage to say what I'm going to say next.

"Gamzee, could we, um, talk?" I ask, trying my best not to stutter.


	23. Chapter 23

**Okay, I'll probably try to get one more up tonight before bed, but I'm not sure about it. Anyways, have some sad Tav and overdosed Gamzee c:**

I turn my head to look at Tav. He sounded pretty serious, and looks serious too.

"Of course. What do you want to motherfucking talk about?" I ask him, wondering what it could be.

"I, um, wanted to talk about Dave", he says taking a deep breath. Oh, so that's why this is so serious. I turn my full attention on him. I've been curious on what really happened, since I can only tell that he messed up and was thrown out.

"I'm all ears", I say staring at him expectantly.

"Well, he came here, after school. We played a game or two, and uhh, talked about stuff. And then I, um, showed him my pictures. He just sort of lifted me onto my bed, and u-um, kissed me. A-and then he t-took off my shirt. I said I-I didn't want i-it, b-but he wouldn't listen. And then he t-tried to, uhh, take off my pants, s-so I h-hit him in the chest. H-he got r-really mad a-and left. A-and, uhh, t-that's all."

I listen to Tav tell as he starts to stutter more and more. How could Dave do that? Sure, I'd like to do it myself, but force Tav into it? No chance motherfuckers. No one forces my little Tav into anything.

I really can't think of anything to say, so as Tav starts to sob I pull him onto my lap and cuddle him, whispering little nothings into his ear. He sobs against my chest for a while and even though he's so sad I can't help but smile. I've got Tav so close and he wants to be there. He trusts me.

"T-thanks for listening", he mumbles as he lifts his head to get into a better position.

"I'll always motherfucking listen to you, Tav", I say with a warm smile and Tav smiles weakly back.

"You're the best friend I could ever have", he says and something pangs in the back of my head. I just hope he doesn't want to be my best friend forever, but would actually want to be more.

"Thanks bro. You're awesome too", I say and he laughs that cute, chiming laugh of his.

"What do you want to do now?" I ask him and he sort of looks through me into nothing. When he doesn't say anything for a while I gently nudge him and he snaps out of it.

"Oh, uh, sorry, I sort of, fell into my own thoughts", he says and I chuckle.

"No problem. I do that all the time", I remind him and he laughs again.

"Could we play some chess again?" he asks and I lift one brow.

"Sure, why not", I say smiling. It would need some concentration, but at least Tav would have something else to think about than that motherfucking Strider. Oh, how I wanted to crush his every bone, make him bleed till he's praying for me to kill him, and then just leave him be. Laugh over him and watch him slowly die away.

"G-gamzee?" I hear Tav squeak and blink my eyes.

"What?" I ask, confused. Why did Tav sound so scared.

"Y-you sort of g-growled, or s-something", he says voice still high.

"Oh fuck", I whisper, put Tav off of my lap, back onto the sofa and rush to the bathroom. I can't keep doing this, forgetting my meds. It's not good for me and it scares the hell out of my crush. Great Gamzee, I'll sure get him now. He'll definitely want a psycho like me.

I lean on the sink for a while and decide to wash off my face paint. I lean my head against the cool mirror and slowly breathe in and out, afraid of looking up to see that I look different.

"Gamzee? Are you all right?" I hear Tav's voice. It's too full of worry. I made Tav worry, again.

"Yeah, I'm fine", I answer him and dry my face, and the mirror from where I leaned against it before going back to Tav.

"So you wanted to play chess?" I ask and he nods. Maybe it will be good for the both of us.

I fetch the game for the two of us and set it up on the floor. Tav gets down before I can even try to help him. I just shrug it off. It's not like he needs me for everything. He did live alone once.

I start the game and am easily over powered on the first round. I really stand no chance in this game. Finally he check mate's my king and I give up, growling a bit in frustration. I notice Tav flinch, but otherwise he doesn't react.

We start a new game and this time it starts out well for me. I stay silent trying to think ahead on what might happen. Tav just seems like he's played a lot more, which he probably has, and the meds I took are starting to fuzz up my brain a bit.

I strain to stay concentrated on the game, but eventually it's just all buzzing in my head and I give up, letting Tav win for the fourth time in a row.

"Gamzee, how many pills did you take?" he asks suddenly and I look up at him.

"I don't know. About three or four", I answer unsure of myself. I pretty much just took a few and swallowed them. Wait. Did I say I might have taken four pills?

"Oh god, Gamzee! You need to go to bed!" Tavros squeaks. Last time I overdosed on my meds I fell asleep in the middle of cooking and that didn't turn out well. But for some reason this doesn't seem to concern me.

"Why should I?" I ask grinning lazily. I blink my eyes rather slowly and Tav looks at me sternly.

"Just do it", he pleads and he looks so motherfucking cute I could just kiss him right now.

"All right, all right, I'll go if you want me to", I drawl out and get up, dragging myself to my bedroom.

I flop onto the bed on my stomach and lay there for a few seconds, not being able to fall asleep. It takes me some time to see the numbers on my clock right, but it's not even late. It's only like half past eight.

Why am I on the bed again? Well no matter, it's comfy as hell here, so I decide to stay there.

Slowly I fall asleep, seeing no dreams. Maybe I should overdose more often.


	24. Chapter 24

**Last update for tonight! I managed to get it done today :)**

I go make sure Gamzee is in his bed and find him already asleep. I have to admit, he looks harmless now, but I know better than that. Once I came home to find the whole apartment was a mess, and Gamzee was sobbing in the corner. He then told me about his problem, his anger issues, and I persuaded him to use the meds he had. He hated the meds. He said they made him see things sometimes.

Quietly I dig out the picture I drew for him and place it next to his alarm clock, which I turn off since he usually forgets to do it himself and I know he doesn't work on Sundays.

I go to my own bed head full of thoughts about tomorrow. I wonder what Gamzee will think of my picture.

I wake up the next morning pretty early, but I don't really mind. I get up and put on some clothes. Then I check on Gamzee. He's still sleeping, now on his back, looking peaceful.

I wheel out of the room and flip on the TV, turning the volume down. I grab some bread to munch on while watching the shows, not sure what I want to stay and watch. I simply flip through all the channels before returning to some weird show and sticking with it. For now at least.

After a while I hear Gamzee stir and get up. He shuffles around the room before a sudden silence comes in place. "Tav?" I hear him ask.

"Yeah?" I reply turning my head slightly.

"Did you draw this?" he asks voice quivering a bit.

"The picture? Yes", I answer carefully. I wonder what he might think about it.

Next I hear him walking. I turn my head and notice he's in the living room. Without a word he walks over to the couch and sits down next to me. For a bit we both stare at each other.

Suddenly Gamzee drapes his arms around me, pulling me closer and burying his face in the crook of my neck.

"G-gamzee! What's wrong?" I ask, hugging him back.

"I never thought it true. I never believed. Not after you and Dave", he mumbles. Then he starts shaking and I hug him closer. "Is it true?"

"Is what true?" I ask back and he pulls back, showing me the picture.

"This?" he asks. I stare at the picture for a few seconds before answering with a small smile.

"We can make it true", I whisper pulling him in for a soft little kiss.

I can tell he wasn't expecting that. He hesitates and I pull away smiling at him. He stares at me dumbfounded before shuddering again and I pull him in for another hug.

"I know it's too early but I motherfucking love you Tav", he says almost crushing me with a hug.

I don't know how to reply to this, so I hug him back. "Could you then, possibly, not crush me?" I ask and he immediately releases me smiling apologetically.

"I'll make you some breakfast", I say, get into my wheelchair and leave him on the couch with his picture. I quickly make him a nice breakfast and put two pills next to it before calling him to eat it. I then abscond to my room and open the computer to check who is online. Should I tell anyone yet? No, no I shouldn't.

It's Sunday and around ten o'clock, so I don't really expect anyone to be on. Well, of course I'm proven wrong and Karkat is on, but he's almost always on. And so is Sollux. I just hope no-one else comes, since someone like Vriska would want to talk to me, and I didn't feel like talking right now.

Now that I think of it I start to wonder why I still have Vriska in my chumroll. She's always mean to me and insulting me every chance she gets. Maybe I should block her. But then she would start to tease me about being a coward, like she did the last time I tried blocking her. Oh god she can be annoying.

I watch the names of my friends for a while before deciding to do something useful. I open YouTube, plug in my headphones and search for some music to listen to. Some rap would be nice. Not that it will help out that much. Not about any emotional things.

I let the music take over my world as I doodle something random on a piece of paper. It ends up being close to a hastily drawn picture of Gamzee with a guitar. I don't think Gamzee even plays the guitar, or any instrument for that matter. He mostly raps, nothing too musical or artistic.

As I change the song I hear the beep of someone pestering me. It seems Sollux has something to say to me.

twinArmageddons [TA] began pestering adiosToreador

TA: hey, KK told me you fiigured GZ out.

TA: ii2 iit true?

AT: uMM, sORT OF, i GUESS,

TA: ehehe, took you long enough.

TA: he'2 had thii2 thiing for you for liike forever a2 ii know of iit.

AT: oH,,,

TA: anyway2, ii wa2 wonderiing when you'll make your move?

TA: KK told me you were planniing 2omethiing

AT: aCTUALLY, i ALREADY DID,

TA: wait what?

TA: what diid you do?

AT: oH, wELL, i DREW A PICTURE,

TA: that'2 iit?

TA: you drew a fuckiing piicture?

TA: TV, ii know you can draw, but ii2n't that a biit, ii don't know..

TA: lame?

AT: hE LIKED IT,

TA: wait a 2econd

TA: what wa2 the piicture about, when diid you giive iit and what happened?

TA: ju2t tell me everythiing

AT: wELL, i DREW US, uM, kISSING,

TA: god, what ii2 goiing through your miind?

AT: i, uHH, pUT IT NEXT TO HIS ALARM CLOCK,

AT: hE WAS ALREADY ASLEEP,

TA: 2o you left iit for hiim to fiind?

AT: sORT OF, yEAH,

TA: ii 2eriiou2ly have no iidea how you thiink

AT: wELL IT WORKED,

AT: hE, uHH, fOUND IT, aND CAME TO ASK IF i DREW IT,

AT: aND, uM, wE KISSED,

TA: are you 2hiitiing me?

TA: ii know he'2 de2perate but you two already kii22ed?

TA: hell, ii don't under2tand the two of you anymore

AT: iT WAS MORE LIIKE, uMM, pROOF FOR HIM, tHAT THIS WAS REAL,

AT: aND IT WAS SHORT,

TA: 2tiill

TA: ii gotta tell thii2 to KK riight now

AT: oH, pLEASE DON'T TELL EVERYONE!

TA: …

TA: fiine, ju2t KK then,

twinArmageddons [TA] ceased pestering adiosToreador

I sigh. Apparently I had to tell someone then. Lucky it wasn't Vriska. And god do I hope Sollux and Karkat keep it to them selves until it becomes official, or something. I don't even know anymore.


	25. Chapter 25

**Have another update! And this is also the half-way point for the story! Yay!**

I study the words on the screen carefully. So Tav and Gam must be together now, and Tav doesn't want to tell yet. Hmm.

I close the chat and open a new one with Karkat.

twinArmageddons [TA] began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]

CG: WHAT NOW FUCKASS?

TA: rude.

TA: ii couldn't even 2ay anythiing.

CG: SO?

TA: fiine.

TA: ii won't tell you.

CG: WHY IN HELL WOULD YOU START A CHAT WITH ME AND NOT TELL ANYTHING?

TA: maybe iit ha2 2omethiing to do wiith your attiitude.

CG: FUKC YOU.

TA: that won't help anythiing.

CG: ARGH! I HATE YOU!

CG: …

CG: FINE. I'M SORRY.

CG: WHAT DID YOU WANT?

TA: well, ii ju2t wanted to tell that TV and GZ are apparently together now.

CG: …

CG: SAY THAT AGAIN?

TA: TV had thii2 plan that apparently worked and got hiim a kii22.

CG: WHAT THE HELL?

TA: that'2 what he told me today.

TA: but he doe2n't want iit to 2pread, 2o don't tell anyone.

CG: …

CG: …...

CG: FINE.

CG: I'LL KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT.

TA: better keep iit that way or ii'll never tell you anythiing anymore.

CG: LIKE YOU WOULD HAVE ANYTHING TO TELL ANYWAYS.

TA: apparently you don't know me a2 well a2 you would want to.

CG: ARE YOU IMPLYING SOMETHING?

TA: ye2, ye2 ii am.

CG: THEN WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING?

TA: that ii do have my 2ecret2

CG: OH, SO THIS IS ANOTHER THING YOU WON'T TELL ME?

TA: exactly.

CG: FUCK YOU ASSHAT

TA: ehehe, you 2ure know how to cheer up my day.

twinArmageddons [TA] ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]

I rub my heterochromatic eyes with the back of my hand and stare at the screen for a second more before I close Pesterchum and continue with the code I've been doing for the whole night. I need to get it ready for today, or I'll be in trouble.

A knock on my front door breaks my train of thought and makes me growl in annoyance. I decide to not care about the person at the door. They'll go away soon enough. I go back to the code I'm working with and get a few lines done before the next interruption.

"You didn't open", is said right next to my ear. Someone probably wants to scare me, but I'm not that easy.

"I know", I say and continue the code. I just know I made Dave frown.

"How the fuck do you not jump out of your god damn skin?" he asks. "Did you hear me come or some shit?"

"Nope", I answer quickly and continue the code hoping Dave would leave.

"I can't understand you", he says and sits down on my desk next to me. "You're supposed to react in some way."

"Who gave you permithion to come in?" I snap at him, angry with my lisp at the moment, making me sound a lot less serious.

"I did, since you didn't come open", he shrugs. I snap my head towards him and I promise he jerked back an inch or two seeing my eyes. Come to think of it I don't know many who have seen them before.

"Dude, what's up with your eyes?" he asks staring at me blankly now.

"How rude", I point out, staring at him angrily. "My eyeth are ath they are. Better leave it at that. And now back to the quiethtion in hand. Why are you here and who in the world gave you permithion to enter my houthe."

"Let's do those backwards, shall we? I have no-one's permission. You're the only one home right now and I sort of wanted to see if you've eaten in the last few days. And I'm still curious about your eyes", he says and I sigh, leaning back.

"I wath born with them fuckath", I answer, not replying to anything else. "Now leave."

"So you haven't eaten?" he asks curiously, not really showing it.

"Dave, you're not my cuthtodian. I'm four yearth older than you", I point out returning to the code. "And yeth, I actually have eaten", I add as an afterthought.

"Fine. I'll find someone else to annoy. Someone like Tavros", he says and I growl, turning to look at him.

"TV got over you, you idiot", I note, not saying anything else.

"He has? Wow, that was fast. I wonder if you're telling the truth now", he says, but I don't answer. He pokes me a few times but I don't care and he huffs slightly. He gets up and walks behind me. I catch it from his reflection on the screen that he just flipped me off. I laugh a bit and he glances at me before flash-stepping away.

I grin slightly and get back to my code, which I actually finish pretty quickly. I work with a few problems on the coding before getting to mail the code. It works now, I have no doubt about that. I add the payment to the code. He'll pay, he'll have to. If he doesn't the code will transpire and send viruses to his computer. I'll do nothing about that if he doesn't pay.

I lean back and stare at the wall before getting up and walking to the kitchen. Last time I ate, it was yesterday around four.

I stare into my empty fridge for a while. I sigh and find my phone from somewhere in my room before sending a message.

2orry to iinterrupt and all, but ii ran out of food. Miind feediing me today?

I send the text and get a reply almost instantly. Of course Gamzee invites me over. I feel a bit bad going there now, but I'll have to worry about it later.

Now I just need to get there. I'll probably take the bus.


	26. Chapter 26

**We're getting there guys. We're getting there. Sorry for the story moving so slowly, btw.**

The instant I told Tav about my message he agreed. I knew he would. He was always so nice to every motherfucker in town, even those who used to tease him or be jerks to him in some other way. He was stronger than people gave him credit for.

So now I was making dinner for the three of us. Sollux was sitting on the kitchen table and Tav was pretty close in his wheelchair. The kitchen was pretty crowded, but I somehow manage to move around.

"So, what were you all up and doing to forget food again?" I ask Sollux and he shrugs.

"I wath coding", he answers. It flashes through my mind that Tav must feel pretty awkward with us both being at least two years older than him and that he doesn't really know Sollux too well. Only through me and Karkat.

"Making those motherfucking miracles?" I ask grinning and turn around to look at him while I let the food slowly cook.

"Yeah, you could thay it that way", he says smirking a bit in a way that reminds me vaguely of Dave.

"It's not, uh, a good idea to stop eating", Tavros stutters and Sollux turns his head to look at Tav.

"I know. I jutht forget. Many timeth", he says and looks back at me through his multicolored shades. "And I like hith cookingth."

Tavros smiles and we all continue a chat while I finish cooking the beefs and other stuff I had planned out for this. Oh how I would have loved to grill this, but I don't happen to own a grill.

"Thorry if I'm rude, but what'th the thituation between you two?" Sollux asks pointing at the both of us with his fork. I glance at Tav and he sort of smiles to me apologetically. So he told Sollux.

"Not sure", I answer really not wanting things to get awkward right now.

"Not thure, eh? Maybe you thould go on a date. Thee how much fun it ith and then get together", he suggests. I glance at him warningly. Sollux had always been like this, saying what he thought straight away, not caring how the others felt, as long as it didn't hurt them too much. I wouldn't have minded but now, though, Tav was getting uncomfortable.

"Maybe", I say and finish my food. "Would you like that, Tav?"

"Umm, sure, sounds, uhh, nice", he says smiling shyly. Yeah, he was uncomfortable all right.

"Good! Now I have thomething to report to KK about", he grins at me. Oh yes, Karkat would love to hear about this, wouldn't he?

"Just don't tell everyone", Tav asks and I roll my eyes smiling. I put the dishes in the dishwasher and the three of us go to enjoy some video games in the living room. I'm starting to wonder if Sollux will ever leave. Yeah, it's nice to see him somewhere other than at work or on the computer, but I would really like some time with Tav to, well, talk things out.

After losing a billion times to Captor I manage to get him to leave. Or more like he says he'll leave the two of us alone. We say our good bye's and then I'm alone with my bro.

"What would you like to motherfucking do?" I ask smiling a bit at Tav, who's sitting on the sofa.

"I don't really know. Do you, uh, really want to go on a date?" he asks a bit shyly.

"Hell yeah", I answer grinning and sit down next to him.

"Oh, um, all right. Where?" he asks and I stare at him.

"You mean you want to go on a date? With me?" I ask unbelieving.

"Uh, yes, I think that's what I said", he says blushing and I briefly think it's cute.

"Well that's motherfucking awesome. It's a pure miracle!" I say grinning from ear to ear.

"Um, sure. Miracles", he says smiling a bit. "So where would you want to go?" he asks again.

"The movies sound like fun. Haven't been there for a while", I say thoughtfully. "That would be motherfucking bitch tits."

"Then let's, uh, go to the movies tomorrow!" Tav says a tad excited. I feel like I could just burst open. I've been wanting this for so long and Tav looks so happy right now. I think I could just die from how happy I am.

"Awesome! This is a miracle worth celebrating for", I say with a wide grin and fetch a bottle of my miraculous Faygo. I open it and offer some to Tavros, but he doesn't want it. I simply shrug it off and sip the awesome drink.

"What will we go see?" Tavros asks and I shrug.

"Let's choose there", I suggest and he nods, changing the channel on the TV. We spend most of the evening watching useless programs on the TV. I quickly check the weather forecast and Tavros insist on trying to teach me a new card game. I fail at learning it miserably, but Tav doesn't mind. Instead he laughs it off, puts the cards back in their box and cuddles on my lap on the floor. I hug him gently close to me, careful this time not to choke him or anything. Don't want to lose this miracle just when I got him.

I jerk a bit as I hear my phone signal a new message and gently move Tav into his wheelchair. He follows me to the kitchen and I check the message.

"Karbro wants me on the computer", I read the text to him and he nods.

"I think you, uh, should go then", he says and I ruffle his Mohawk.

"You're the best", I say before leaving to my room. I hear Tav moving around for a while until he finds a place he likes. I sit down on my chair and swivel around while I wait for the computer to power up. I really should ask Sollux to fix it up some time. It's been behaving very suspiciously lately. Like it would shut down any second.

I barely get to log into Pesterchum when Karkat already pesters me.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] began pestering terminallyCapricious [TC]

CG: ARE YOU FUCKING TOGETHER NOW OR SOME SHIT LIKE THAT?

TC: wElL i ThInK wE'rE tOgEtHeR bUt I dOn'T tHiNk We'Re FuCkInG aNyTiMe SoOn.

TC: tHoUgH tHaT sOuNdS gOoD ;o)

CG: OH GOD, YOU'RE SUCH A PERVERT.

CG: HOW CAN HE POSSIBLY FALL FOR YOU?

TC: dOn'T qUeStIoN tHe MiraclEs.

TC: tO bE hOnEsT i DoN't KnOw MySeLf.

TC: iT's NoT lOnG aGo I lAsT sCaReD hIm.

CG: WHO DID WHAT?

CG: HOW COULD YOU SCARE HIM?

TC: fOrGoT mY mEdS.

CG: GOD I CAN'T UNDERSTAND YOU SOMETIMES.

CG: OR HIM FOR THE MATTER.

CG: HOW CAN HE LIVE WITH YOU IF YOU KEEP GOING CRAZY?

TC: dOn'T kNoW.

TC: mAyBe I'm JuSt ToO gOoD lOoKiNg.

TC: hOnK ;o)

CG: S-SHUT THE FUCK UP ASSHOLE!

TC: jUsT mEsSiNg WiTh YoU.

CG: YOU BETTER BE.

CG: YOU ALREADY GOT YOURSELF A BOYFRIEND.

CG: ONCE AGAIN.

TC: aWw, ThAt'S nOt NiCe :o(

TC: bEsIdEs, I tHiNk YoU aLrEaDy GoT yOuR eYeS oN sOmEoNe.

CG: I CAN'T SAND YOU SOMETIMES.

TC: nIgHt :o)

CG: GOOD FUCKING NIGHT TO YOU TOO.

CG: AND DON'T TAKE THAT TOO LITERALLY.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased pestering terminallyCapricious [TC]


	27. Chapter 27

**Okay, here's another chapter. Don't have much time today either :/**

I sit in the passenger's seat of Gamzee's car with my wheelchair folded in the back. He's driving us to the movie theater, and neither of us still knows what they are even showing. I hope we don't end up watching something too scary. Though I think Gamzee would probably do that on purpose to get to hold me.

The thought makes me smile a bit as I watch the streetlamps fly by. Gamzee mostly keeps his eyes on the road, but I actually catch him glancing my way a few times.

We arrive at the theater and Gamzee helps me back onto my wheelchair before wheeling me inside. We choose a romance movie, since I wanted to and somehow we manage to get to the seats assigned to us.

The movie is really nice, though it is a bit saddish to my liking. Well, the kiss Gamzee gives me cheers me up a bit. It's not too short either, and lasts for quite a bit.

The two of us notice Karkat and John exit the same movie as us and Gamzee insist on catching up to them.

"Enjoy the movie?" he asks and Karkat spins around like he'd just been scared out of his skin.

"I could see you enjoyed it as well", Karkat growled and stared at Gamzee for a bit before looking at me. "Are you two on a date or some shit?"

"Uhh, yeah, yes we are", I stutter a bit and notice John smiling widely.

"That is so awesome!" he says grinning widely. I think he'll cut his face if he smiles any wider. "You two make the perfect couple!"

I blush a bit and Gamzee smiles, leaning down against my wheelchair. I notice his face is right next to mine and I slightly turn to look. When I do this he gives me another quick kiss and I feel my face grow a brighter shade of red.

I hear John snicker a bit and Gamzee smiles down at me, now standing up again. Karkat is staring at him with a mixed expression of anger and amusement.

"You might just want to think those ahead, Gamzee. Just letting you fucking know", Karkat said glaring back at the people who stared and they efficiently turned their heads away. "Not all people fancy gays."

I notice Karkat glance at John while he's starting to talk about the movie, how it would have been better with Nic Cage in it and how the ending could have been a bit happier. I listen to him as Karkat starts an argument on how stupid Nic Cage really is and it continues from there. Gamzee and I say good bye and leave them to argue about the actor.

Next up Gamzee takes me to the cafe he works at. I briefly wonder if I'll ever be the one to take us to places with my wheelchair limiting my access. This thought, though, is quickly pushed away as Gamzee orders us something and starts explaining about some new band coming up. I never really knew about new bands if Gamzee didn't tell me. Usually he did, I just never listened.

"So I was thinking that maybe we could go watch the concert", he ends his talk and I snap out of my thoughts.

"Um, yeah, sounds nice", I say, only catching the end. A concert, huh. "When is it?"

"It's cute when you space out. I already told you", he says grinning and I blush a bit.

"Sorry", I mumble and grab the cup of tea which is brought up to me.

"No problems, Tavbro. I do it all the motherfucking time", he says still grinning and grabs his drink, which I actually think is Faygo in a cup.

"So when was it?" I ask still a bit guilty for not listening.

"It's in a few weeks time, at the end of this month", he explains, sounding very thrilled about it. I think it's cute how much he loves music, and I think he's good at playing even though he never had an instrument. At least I haven't seen it anywhere.

"Um, yeah, we can go", I say. I'll have to ask the exact date later, but I don't really need it now.

"That's motherfucking great!" he says grinning and I smile. The time is quickly spent with Gamzee telling all sorts of stories and jokes to me. He drives the two of us back home and pushes me to the elevator. The old woman looks at the two of us, while Gamzee totally ignores her and plays with my Mohawk.

She leaves the elevator and I quietly think she must have forgotten the cookies she said she'd bake. Gamzee doesn't seem to care about anyone else than me, though. He is still playing with my Mohawk and talking about the date.

We make it to our apartment and Gamzee makes us some popcorn while I decide on which game we'll play. Maybe I'll try something a bit scarier. Yeah, Gamzee will play something and I'll watch. A gaming night with my best bro! Oh, wait, I guess I can call him my boyfriend now. I have been on an official date and all.

I hear the popcorn popping followed by a string of curses. Curiously and a tad worried I turn my head towards the kitchen, pondering if I should check on what just happened. What did just happen?

"Are you, um, all right?" I ask in a small voice, trying not to sound too worried this time.

"Yeah, I'm motherfucking fine. Burnt my hand and spilled some popcorn, that's all", Gamzee replies in his laid back manner.

I let him be with his problem, since my wheelchair would only be in the way and instead try to come up with which game I'd like to see him play. I'm no good at video games, even though I play a lot. Gamzee always beats me. I never stand a chance.

In card and board games I always win, though. He is not really good at those. I wonder why, since all the action games he spends his time on seem to need a lot of concentration, but the board games we play are pretty simple, not including chess or other games like that. Chess is always fun, even though I know I'll win.

I choose a game for him to play and soon he comes with the popcorn, starting up the game. I watch him play for around ten minutes before I get an idea.

"Hey Gamzee, I was wondering if we could get a puppy", I suggest all of a sudden.

"A dog?" he asks, not really sounding thrilled. He never stops playing and even manages to keep his character alive without looking at the screen all the time.

"Yeah, like from a shelter. A, um, rescued dog", I say smiling a bit. Well I've never really thought about it too much, but I've always wanted a dog, ever since I was a little boy with working legs.

"Well we could motherfucking think about that", he says slowly. Somehow I can tell he isn't too thrilled about the whole idea. I know he doesn't love animals, but I don't think he has anything against them. Maybe the part that they are so much care and he doesn't always remember, but otherwise there is simply not a bad thing about dogs!

"It would be lovely", I say excitedly and he glances at me.

"It's a shitload of responsibility, that's what it is. But we can think about it. If this building even accepts pets", he points out. Oh yeah, that I didn't think about.

"Well, I think we could figure that out", I say hopefully and the topic is dropped. Still I can't stop thinking about it. I really do want a small puppy.


	28. Chapter 28

**And second for today. I really hope we can get this over soon so I can start the sequel and I hope the fast pace isn't too much for you guys.**

I lay awake in my bed. For some reason, even though it usually is easy for me, I don't seem to be able to fall asleep.

Slowly I turn onto my side and stare over the dark room towards Tavros's bed. I can barely make out his form in the dark. He looks like he's on either of his sides, but I can't really tell if he's facing me or not.

He has his blankets pulled up all the way to his face and after staring at him for a bit I decide he is indeed facing me. For a while nothing happens. It is quiet, no cars are heard, no animals, nothing. I shudder as the wind suddenly picks up and blows hard against the building.

I glance at the window before looking back at Tav and jump up. I blink a few times, but there's nothing weird anywhere. God, I could have sworn Tav had just been staring at me with blank white eyes.

I stay there for a while, sitting on my bed, leaning against the wall. I don't really feel like going to sleep. I'm afraid I'll see nightmares again. And I don't want to. I continue to stare at Tavros for god knows how long.

Finally I feel my eyes droop and slowly slip back under the covers. I really should get some shut eye, even if I don't have work tomorrow.

After trying again I manage to fall asleep. The dream starts out in the carnival my mother took me to when I was young. I walk into a colorful tent, but inside it isn't fun at all. It's exactly the opposite.

The tent from inside is dark. It has huge shadows everywhere and there are exactly zero people there. The tent itself is huge and I barely can make out the other end of it. I walk to the center where there is a tiny circle of light. I stand there dark long strands of hair hanging on my face and I notice a mirror.

Slowly I approach the mirror and look at myself. I have my polka-dotted pants, a loose gray T-shirt and my hair is a total mess. I look at my face a bit closer and my purplish eyes stare back at me.

I hear a sound from behind. Footsteps. Slowly I raise my gaze upwards and a figure is standing behind me. A ringmaster with clown make-up on. He is smiling crookedly at me and I stare back, afraid to move. The ringmaster slowly pulls out three knifes. He leans over me and scratches the mirror across my reflections face. I wince as I feel the pain of the sharp metal break my skin, but for some reason I still can't move.

Then the ringmaster is gone and I stagger back, falling on the ground clutching my face and a booming voice shouts through the empty tent.

"Welcome to the Dark Carnival, brother."

I bolt up as I feel someone shake me and try to calm down my uneven breathing. With wide eyes I look around and see Tav in his wheelchair next to my bed, looking frightened.

"G-gamzee, a-are you all right?" he asks voice shaking. "Y-you were screaming."

"Damn. Sorry, bro, just a bad dream", I say brushing some cold sweat from my forehead. I'm still trying to calm my breathing but I still manage to smile anyways.

Tavros on the other hand doesn't seem convinced.

"I'm serious. You were screaming like you were in pain", he said sternly, clearly worried out of his mind.

"Really, it was just a bad motherfucking dream", I repeat, not wanting to go into details.

"Fine..." Tavros says after a few seconds of unsure silence. He pulls my face to his own and kisses me quickly, catching me off guard once again.

"Night", he says and goes back to his bed. I lie back down and watch as he gets into his own bed, into a comfortable position and looks at me smiling tiredly. I feel bad for waking him up, but at the same time I'm happy he's there for me.

Slowly I fall into a sleep and this time it isn't filled with creepy ass tents or carnivals. I am, though woken up by the doorbell.

"Gamzee, could you get that?" Tavros asks groggily and it seems only reasonable for me to do it. For him it would take too long. I groan and pull myself out of bed. I am way too sleepy to put on any clothes other than the boxers I'm already wearing and walk to the door.

I open the door and lean against the doorframe looking at the old granny standing there. She eyes me suspiciously for a second before looking up at my face.

"Have you ever heard about clothes?" she asks sounding a tad angry.

"Well I'm not naked, so yes. You ever thought about how early you come knocking on doors?" I retort and she frowns.

"The other boy is a lot nicer. I brought him some cookies, I remembered them yesterday", she says handing me the basket.

"Yeah, I'll give 'em to him", I say grinning again.

"Thank you. Good bye", she says and I swear I heard her muttering something about teens today.

I bring the cookies into my room and put them down on the desk. Next I slip into Tav's bed and hug him from behind.

"Who was it?" he asks still a bit groggy.

"The old lady from next door", I answer nuzzling my face into his soft hair.

"Oh. And you opened the, uhh, door in your boxers?" he asks.

"Yeah, is there a motherfucking problem?" I ask pulling my head back as he turns around. The serious expression on his face makes me frown a bit.

"Yes. Only I can see those abs of yours", he says and kisses me.

The kiss catches I off-guard yet again and it takes me a second, but finally I return the kiss. I let my hand slip down to his waist but he stops me there, ending the kiss.

"Mm?" I hum, opening my eyes. Wait, when did I close them?

"Not now", he says smiling a bit, but sounding serious. "Not, uh, yet, at least."

I just nuzzle my face into the crook of his neck and nod a bit, making him chuckle.

"No hurry", I say, still feeling a bit empty about the rejection, but perfectly okay with taking my time. "You're the best."

"You are too", he says and I can just about hear the smile on his face.


	29. Chapter 29

**Only one chapter today. Sorry guys.**

I wake up an hour later to find myself sleeping with Gamzee. This time, though, he doesn't have his leg in my crotch. I move his hands away from around my waist and he groans a bit in his sleep, turning around.

I quietly get up and somehow manage to get over him and into my wheelchair. Wheeling out of the room I go fetch something to eat. I eat a regular breakfast and then go to wake Gamzee up. He has work and I have school. How early did that lady even come?

After waking up Gamzee I dress and pack my bag for school. I have time to kill and Gamzee has to leave soon. How I wish I wouldn't have to be alone so much. I decide to spend the spare time watching more TV.

I get to school all fine, not seeing any bullies around. I hang with my friends through the first few periods, but the trouble starts at lunch.

"Yo, Tav", I hear from behind and turn my head to see no-one else but Dave Strider walking to me with his lunch. He sits down next to me and looks at me.

"Heard you got over me", he starts. Oh god, I know this won't end well. "Who helped you?"

"W-what do you, uh, mean?" I ask a bit scared.

"How'd you do it? Are you with someone else now?" he asks and my gaze drops immediately down to my plate.

"Ha. I knew it. Is it Vriska? Or maybe some other boy", he starts to come up with the people I hate the most.

"Wait, I know. It's the juggalo freak, isn't it?" he asks and I tense, which actually gets him to smirk. "Knew it, you're with the juggalo."

"Shut up", I whisper, still staring at my plate.

"What was that? Couldn't hear you", he says, still smirking.

"Shut up", I repeat, but he acts like it was nothing.

"Oh, you want me to shut up? Standing up for your juggalo boyfriend? Oh wait, yes, you can't stand up", he smirks again and I feel the anger spark in me.

"I said shut up!" I yell and the whole cafeteria goes silent. "Don't you say another bad thing about Gamzee!"

"Hey there, no need to get upset. We all know he's a jug-"

I punch him square in the face and he falls back, dropping to the ground. I stare at him and he stares back shocked. Without another word I turn around and leave the cafeteria's silence, hoping I will just be left alone.

The next period no one approaches me and I'm very glad for it. Only on the last break does John come up to me.

"You gave Dave quiet the punch", he says smiling a bit. "Bet he didn't expect that."

I stay quiet, unsure if I should thank him or ask him to leave.

"You don't have to talk. We'll just keep quiet if you want us to", he says with a warm smile on his face. I can't believe he has been Dave's friend for so long, but is still so different.

"I don't k-know what got into me", I manage to say. "I-I didn't mean to h-hit him."

"Aww, Tav, don't cry. Please don't cry. I didn't mean it like that!" John says quickly and I feel tears starting to fall down.

"I-is he hurt?" I ask sniffing and dry my eyes, or at least try to.

"Nah, nothing bad. Just got scared out of his pants", John says grinning.

Wait, did he just say I scared Dave?

"What do you, uh, mean?" I ask frowning a bit.

"Well, he won't admit it, but the punch caught him off guard. Of course he didn't expect you to have that sort of power.

"B-but I didn't even, um, try to hit him hard", I admit and John gives me this weird, sort of shocked face.

"You didn't hit him with all you got?" he asks and I hesitantly nod. "Wow, that chair must give your arms an awesome work out. Well, anyways, Dave isn't hurt. Just like I said, he'll never admit it, but for a second it was there. He was pretty shocked."

I stay silent. I caught Dave off guard. Oh god. He must want revenge after that.

"Anyways, I have to go now. Last class is starting soon. Try to get home all right! Gamzee will be there for you", he says winking and I manage a small smile. With a wave of his hand he's gone in the sea of students and I'm left alone next to my next class. I really miss the time I could just run around school, not sit there like the worthless thing I am.

I'm just thinking the lesson won't ever end when the beautiful sound of the bells ringing announces I may leave. I pack my bag and hurry out of there before anyone can stop me and decide I don't want to take the bus. I'll wheel myself home.

My apartment isn't too far away, but it's still a long way for someone who's stuck in a wheelchair. Someone like me. I take a break after an unusually steep hill and look around. No one seems to be anywhere. It's like the whole neighborhood is dead. Well I don't mind.

I get home tired and just wanting to go to bed. I fumble with my keys for a bit, since the door is still locked. That must mean Gamzee's not home yet. I get inside, eat a small sandwich and get to the sofa, where I curl up into a ball and start sobbing.

It takes an hour before I hear the door open again, and by this point I'm not crying too much anymore. Some silent tears keep falling down my face, though.

"Sorry I'm late, Kan kept me overtime and then I dropped by the store to get some ingridients for food", I hear Gamzee from the hall and a sob racks through my body.

He goes to the kitchen and puts the food away before actually asking anything.

"Tav, are you here?" he asks a tad worried and I feel more tears stream down my face. Great. Get him worried too.

"Tavros?" he asks as he comes to the living room. He immediately notices me and approaches me, sitting down on the sofa. He pulls me into his arms and I start to cry again. He just holds me, whispering stuff in my ear I half understand.

"What's wrong?" he asks after I've calmed down enough to talk.

"I-I hit D-dave in school today", I answer and an angry expression crosses Gamzee's face.

"What did that motherfucker do to you this time?" he asks voice dangerously low.

"N-nothing to me. He, uh, c-called you a juggalo", I say and feel Gamzee's arms relax around me.

"Called me a juggalo, did he? And you went and hit him just for that?" he asks, actually sounding a bit amused.

"Y-yeah", I answer.

"So why are you all up and crying?" he asks rubbing circles on the back of my hand with his thumb.

"Because I hurt him", I say and Gamzee snorts.

"That's right for him", he says and the two of us fall into a silence. Gamzee grabs the remote, flipping the TV on and we continue the day by watching some TV.


	30. Chapter 30

**I think we have like 20 chapters to go at thsi point. We're so close.**

I follow Tav after school, not sure why exactly I'm doing this. He doesn't take the bus, though. He decides to wheel himself home. I keep a stoic face as I silently follow him, keeping far enough for him not to notice anything.

Well at least now I know where he got the strength to knock me to the ground. I growl at myself and barely have time to hide as he gets to the top of the hill and looks around. I follow him up to his house and stand in front of the door for about five minutes.

Finally I get bored and start walking, unsure of where I should go next. I decide to let my feet carry me where ever they want to.

"You home, Captor?" I ask after opening his door.

"What the fuck? Don't you ever learn any mannerth?" I hear him shout from his room and follow the sound of his voice.

"I did knock, but no-one answered", I say shrugging and plop down on his bed.

"What are you doing here?" he asks clearly annoyed.

"Just thought I'd drop by", I say shrugging again and stare at him in his chair.

"What are you doing here?" he repeats the question and I stare at him.

"I followed Tav to his apartment building and decided to walk somewhere else."

"You followed Tav", he says it again and I start to wonder why I did it. "Why would you ever follow Tav home?"

"I have no fucking idea", I admit leaning back against the wall. "But at least I know where he got his fucking strength."

"What do you mean?" he asks mildly interested.

"He hit me today", I say, showing no emotion.

"Oh wow, and you didn't loothe your jaw?" he asks, clearly mocking me.

"Yeah right, like he could do that", I huff.

"Bet you he'd win anyone in an arm wrethtling contetht" Sollux says and I stare at him through my shades.

"What ever. I don't care", I end the conversation and he turns back to his computer, putting his earphones back in place. I stare at the back of his head for a while, not bothering to say anything before I go to his kitchen.

I open the fridge to find it almost empty, containing only some drinks and something to put onto bread.

"Dude, how do you keep alive?" I yell to him, not sure if he'll hear with the headphones on. Then again I'm not sure if he's listening to anything at the moment.

"Don't even thtart, Thrider", he answers tiredly.

I chuckle and make a mental note to buy him some real food soon. I also decide not to waste any of his food, if he ever would happen to eat it. Instead I throw my bag into the hall and get back to his room.

"I'm serious. How do you not die of starvation?" I ask sitting on the edge of his table.

"I thaid don't thart", he says grumpily.

"Fine, whatever, just curious", I say lifting my hands in the air giving up.

I wonder around his house for a while before deciding he's really boring. All he has is a crap ton of electronics, many books on electronics and more electronics. Oh, and his stupid beehive in the yard.

I wonder where he keeps all the honey. I know he collects it, since often in the summers he has to stop conversations to do so.

"Where's your 'secret honey chamber'?" I ask him leaning on his doorframe.

"I don't have one", he answers not even looking at me.

"Come on, you must have one. You're always collecting the honey from your precious bees", I say smirking.

"You're thtarting to get on my nerveth", he says and I stare at him for a bit.

"Fine, I'll leave", I say surrendering. No use getting him mad at me too.

He doesn't say anything, just motions towards the door and continues his stupid coding.

I frown a bit and leave, grabbing my bag on the way out.

I walk home and flop onto the couch. Once again there's no bro to be seen anywhere. Just the fucking puppets. I throw my bag angrily across the room and it lands at the foot of my room's closed door.

Growling I get up and go to my room, dropping down at my computer. Fuck this, I'm bored with nothing to do. Of course I know who will definitely be there.

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering twinArmageddons [TA]

TG: sup?

TA: you were liiterally at my hou2e liike fiive miinute2 ago.

TG: i know.

TA: why are you a2kiing then?

TG: didn't ask when i was there.

TA: fiine ii gue22.

TG: what's wrong?

TA: why would anythiing be wrong?

TG: just sounded like it from your answer.

TA: you are bothering me.

TG: why wouldn't i?

TA: cau2e ii have a fuckiing deadliine to fiight agaiin2t.

TG: take a break, dude.

TG: you seriously need a break from that computer shit.

TA: no, not gonna happen.

TG: i'll come and make you if you don't do it willingly.

TA: no need for that.

TA: ii'll ju2t fiinii2h thii2 code and get 2ome 2leep.

TG: good. i'll drop by tomorrow to bring some food by the way.

TA: what?

TA: no.

TA: 2eriiou2ly, dave, what'2 gone iinto you?

TA: you're iin no way re2pon2iible for me.

TG: but i want to, so shut up.

TA: fiine, but ii'm payiing you two do iit then.

TG: whatever.

TG: dude, i don't care about your money.

TA: ju2t 2hut up and let me work.

twinArmageddons [TA] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG]


	31. Chapter 31

**I'm sory if the chapters are too short for you guys. I'll try to make them longer in the sequel.**

I spent the whole evening with Tav, making sure he was alright, and I sort of wish he would stand up for himself like he stands up for me. He hit Dave just because he called me a juggalo. Like I wasn't already used to that.

I carried him to bed later and he barely resisted, which got me even more worried. He'd not let me carry himself around. It's not like him. He immediately fell asleep and left me wondering if he was okay.

The morning came and I woke up to his alarm, which doesn't usually happen. I look up groggily and notice he didn't wake up. Alarmed I get out of bed and shut the alarm, gently shaking him.

"Tav, wake up", I say and he glances at me, groaning slightly.

"What?" he asks tiredly.

"You didn't wake up to your alarm, bro", I say siting down on the edge of his bed. I try his forehead and scrunch my eyebrows. "I think you all up and got yourself sick."

"What? I can't be sick! We have a test at school!" he squeaks pulling himself into a sitting position.

"We'll have to see", I say and go to the bathroom to fetch the thermometer and grab two pills for myself at the same time. I swallow them dry and hurry back to Tav.

"I'll go make something to eat", I say and he nods, taking the thermometer from me. I leave him on his bed and go make a decent breakfast for once. I pour some cereal for myself, not sure if he really wants to eat, if he is indeed sick. I then decide to make some tea, that he will definitely want.

After getting everything set for him I go back to the room and grab the thermometer from him.

"Bro, you got a high motherfucking fever", I say frowning a bit. "Not going to school today. No chance."

He frowns, but is clearly too tired to say anything against me and lets me help him into his wheelchair. I push him into the kitchen and give him his tea, taking my own breakfast for myself.

After eating I help Tav to the couch, get him a blanket and a pillow and leave his wheelchair and cellphone nearby.

"I'll try to get someone here to keep you company. It'll get motherfucking lonely for you", I say and he smiles weakly before turning his gaze to the TV. Somehow I think he might fall asleep any second.

After making sure he's got everything he might need for the second time I finally leave to go to Karkat's place. Might as well get him like every other morning. I don't see why not.

After the short walk to Karkat's place I knock at his door and he opens almost immediately.

"Why are you knocking now? Went to some fucking school, have you?" he asks and I grin lazily.

"I don't motherfucking know", I admit and push inside past him. He closes the door behind me and follows me to his living room where I'm spread out on his couch.

"Well there go the fucking manners", he grunts and drags himself towards the kitchen.

"Tav's sick", I say and hear him huff in annoyance.

"What do I fucking care?" he asks and I chuckle.

"I didn't think you would, just wanted to let you know", I say shrugging and close my eyes.

"Aren't you going to work today?" he asks after a moment and I open my eyes to see him standing at the door to the kitchen with a steaming hot cup of coffee in hand.

"You coming with me?" I ask sitting up and watching him as he slowly nods his head, sipping more of his drink. "Then you might not want to drink too much of that motherfucking shit."

He growls at me and goes into the kitchen to finish his drink. He then hurries to get his bag ready and the two of us are off, heading to the cafe.

At the cafe I start out by cleaning the tables and bringing Karkat his second coffee for the day. Oh wait, I don't really know if it's the second. He might have as well stayed up all night and drank a few more than two cups while at it.

The first customers arrive just as Karkat leaves. "Have a nice day", I say to him and greet the customers with a lazy wave.

"What miracles may I get you?" I ask smiling and the woman stares at me before ordering whatever wicked drink she wanted. I get her the drink and continue on like this until there starts to be a bit of a crowd. I serve them all until I get my break and go to the back.

There I get my phone from the pocket of my jacket and open my Pesterchum app. Oh, I guessed it.

terminallyCapricious [TC] began pestering twinArmageddons [TA]

TC: WhEn ArE yOu GeTtInG oUt Of ThE lIbRaRy?

TA: whenever ii want two.

TA: they won't keep me here, ii've done 2o much overtiime.

TC: GrEaT!

TC: MiNd KeEpInG cOmPaNy To TaV? He'S sIcK aNd AlL aLoNe.

TA: and you couldn't fiind anyone el2e?

TC: WhAt DiD yOu eXpEcT? Me CaLlInG fEfErI tO dO iT?

TA: fiine. ii'll get there when ii get out.

TC: YoU sAiD yOu CaN aLl Up aNd LeAvE aNyTiMe YoU mOtHeRfUcKiNg WaNt.

TA: ii diidn't 2ay ii wa2 leaviing right thii2 iin2tant.

TC: BuT yOu'Ll LeAvE sOmEtImE wOn'T yOu?

TA: yeah, whatever.

TA: now let me get back to work and ii'll get two leave 2ooner.

TC: AlL rIgHt.

TC: ByE! :o)

terminallyCapricious [TC] ceased pestering twinArmageddons [TA]

Well, at least Tav wouldn't have to be alone for the whole day now. Or I hope Sollux will go there to cheer him up. Maybe he could help Tav a bit. But he can't cook. Well he'll be company and they might get to be better friends that way.

I don't really care, as long as Sollux goes there and is nice.


	32. Chapter 32

**Okay, I might update some more in the evening but for now I'm taking a break and maybe studying for a bit.**

Most of the morning after Gamzee left I simply watched TV, too tired to get up and do something. I even managed to fall asleep.

Now there's a knocking at the door which wakes me up.

"It's open", I say, not sure if it's wise to say so but too tired to care, eyes fluttering back shut again.

"Hey Tav. Brought you thome company", I hear the lisping of Sollux from the hall and then some really fast and light foot steps. I open my eyes just in time to see a small puppy run into the room and jump onto two legs against the sofa.

"Who's this?" I ask scratching the puppy behind its ears.

"It'th FF'th dog. Thhe brought it to me for a while. It'th thuch a pain in the ath", he groans picking up the puppy and lifting it up to sit next to me. It immediately starts licking my face and I giggle a bit.

"What's the, um, name?" I ask pushing the puppy a bit farther to see Sollux better. He's sitting on the armchair and rubbing his eyes behind his weird glasses.

"I think thhe called it Cuttle or thomething, but I prefer to call it a monthter", he said and I giggle again.

"It's cute", I say scratching the puppy as it rolls around and almost falls off the couch a few times.

"Might be. You thould thee what it doeth to my cordth", he mutters crossing his arms and staring at Cuttle and I.

"I can't imagine it doing anything bad", I admit as the puppy rolls onto its back wagging its tail lazily.

"That'th it. You get it to calm down immediately", he says scrunching his eyebrows a bit. "How do you keep it thtill?"

I chuckle lightly and rub the puppy's belly. "I don't know."

He groans again in frustration and gets up.

"Do you have anything to eat? Maybe thomething GZ made? I'm thtarving", he says.

"Umm, there might be some, leftovers from yesterday, I guess", I say. "Look in the fridge."

Sollux nods and disappears into the kitchen. Cuttle gets up and looks in the general direction, but decides to stay next to me. I smile and scratch his head.

"Tav, you want anything?" I hear Sollux ask from the kitchen and think for a bit.

"Maybe a sandwich or, uh, something", I answer and hear Sollux search for the bread. At this Cuttle jumps down and races to the kitchen paws slipping on the floor.

"Hey, calm down! I have food for you too!" I hear Sollux shout from the kitchen and then there's Cuttle's whining.

"Oh god, just thhut up for a second, I'll get food thoon", he says and I chuckle taking this time to change the channel on the TV to something I like a bit more.

After a while of rummaging in the kitchen Sollux comes back with my sandwich, his leftovers and something to drink for the both of us. The puppy runs in circles around his feet, almost tripping him a few times.

"Fine, fine, I'll get you your food!" Sollux growls annoyed and puts down his own food to go get something he brought with him.

Finally all three of us are eating, me slowly munching on the bread and Sollux enjoying some of yesterday's food. Cuttle is in the kitchen where Sollux put his cup of food.

"What would you like to do?" he asks after finishing his food.

"Um, I don't know. Can you, uh, play games?" I ask, even though I know the answer.

"Are you kidding me? I beet GZ tho many timeth latht time and you're thtill athking?" Sollux asks smirking and I chuckle.

"Let's play something", I say and let him choose a game. It's something fairly simple, Mario Party 9, and since it's mostly based on luck I get close to beeting him in it.

"Won again", he says and I put the remote down.

"Change the game", I say and he does as is told. "Take Left 4 Dead!"

He glances at me before taking said game and putting it into the consol.

"You play it often?" he asks and I nod.

"I usually watch Gamzee play, but, uh, I can play too", I stutter and he gives me a smile.

"Then thow me how well you play", he demands, giving me the other controller and the two of us are off.

After playing games for a while Sollux leaves me alone to take Cuttle outside. The whining was getting on his nerves.

Now I'm left alone for a while and look around. I work my way into my wheelchair and wheel to my room, fetching a pencil and a notebook.

I return to the living room, get back on the couch and start sketching. It's a quick sketch of Sollux walking outside my apartment with Cuttle running ahead on a leash, even though I don't even know what the leash looks like on the dog.

A smile pulls at my lips as I draw sketching some birds for Cuttle to chase. I make some more details to the background, drawing shadows into the windows and a wind to ruffle through the leaves of the bushes.

"I had no idea you were an artitht", Sollux's lispy voice scares me and makes me jump. I drop the pencil I was holding and Cuttle picks it up, jumping on the couch and giving it to me.

"Thorry, didn't mean to thcare you", he says smirking and sits down next to me. I drop my gaze down embarrassed but he doesn't care. Instead he grabs my notebook and looks at the picture for a while.

"Oh wow, thethe are amazing", he says flipping through the pages filled with sketches. They barely contain a single good picture.

"Uh, thanks, I guess", I say looking up at him.

"No, really, you rock at drawing", he says smiling and I smile back. I could really consider making friends with him.


	33. Chapter 33

**Probably the only update for today. Sorry I'm so lazy.**

I drop by at the store quickly to fetch some Fanta for Tav before going home.

I open the door and am immediately attacked by a tiny puppy. Oh no. After making sure the puppy doesn't get outside I close the door and take off my jacket. With the puppy at my heels I go put the soda into the fridge and go into the living room. The puppy follows me and sprints to the couch, jumping against it and Tav lifts it up.

"How've you two been?" I ask looking from Sollux to Tavros.

"Pretty, uh, good!" Tavros says, still looking weak and tired, but a lot happier. The puppy turns on its back and Tav starts rubbing it's belly.

"Fine", Sollux says flipping the channel on the TV.

"Who's this?" I ask walking to the couch and pick up the brown little dog.

"It'th Cuttle, FF'th dog", Sollux answers. "I have to look after it for a few dayth while thhe ith out of town."

I nod looking the puppy in the eyes and it growls a bit. I hold it a bit farther away and put it back on Tav's lap where it instantly curls up into a ball and stares at me.

"Couldn't we get a puppy?" Tav pleads and I shake my head.

"No", I say and sit down next to him on the couch.

"Why not?" Tav asks and I grin.

"Me and animals is a motherfucking bad combination", I huff and stare at the dog, which is staring back.

"What do you mean?" Sollux asks frowning and I chuckle.

"They don't like me, that's all", I answer and turn my gaze to Sollux.

"How come? I don't think all animalth can hate you, can they?" he asks and I nod. I then feel Cuttle lick my hand and I look at it before gently rubbing it under the chin.

"Thee? It liketh you", Sollux says and I grimace.

"It would all up and like to chew my finger off", I say as the dog bites down on my finger, the sharp teeth painfully ripping at my skin.

"Cuttle!" Sollux yelps and I stare at the dog, which doesn't react at all. It doesn't let go until Tav grabs its jaws and gently pries it off.

I examine my finger which is bleeding and frown.

"Told you they don't like me", I say as Sollux comes over and grabs Cuttle.

"Thorry for that", he says after lifting the dog and I shake my head.

"Just a scratch", I say and get up to go find a band-aid.

"I'll go now. Need to get thith dog under control", Sollux says but I stop him before he can leave.

"Don't punish it at home. It won't understand if you punish it for something it did earlier", I say and he nods.

After Sollux left I sat back down next to Tav.

"Wow, that must have, uh, hurt", he says staring at My finger.

"Not much", I chuckle. "I've been through worse."

"Still. You could have told me, uh, earlier, about this", he says and I arch one brow.

"What do you all up and mean with that?" I ask and he smiles.

"Your problem with animals", he says.

"They seem to love you", I point out and he laughs.

"Well yes. It would be weird having a dog here who hates you and loves me", he says and I chuckle again.

"Or a dog at all", I say and his smile fades a bit.

"Do all animals hate you?" he asks and I nod.

"We had two cats when I lived with my parents, but they always scratched the hell out of me, no matter what I did. We had to get rid of them. Then we got a dog, but it would always try to bite me. So that was no good either. Even the lambs in the petting zoo either ran away from me or attacked me", I explain and Tav frowns.

"They're afraid of you?" he asks looking really confused.

"I think so. They motherfucking hate me or something. I don't even know what I all up and did to them", I say leaning back and watching the TV for a bit.

"What if we went to visit the shelter sometime?" he asks breaking the silence. "Not all of them can hate you!"

"You sound like you're trying to talk me into buying a dog", I say and chuckle. I notice from the corner of my eye that he looks down and laugh. "We can motherfucking think about it, but can it wait? I'd like to rest a bit after a day at work."

I play some games for Tav for around an hour and make a late dinner for myself at half past six.

"You want anything?" I ask Tav as I finish my own food and start emptying my plate.

"No thanks", he says but then gets an idea. "Or wait, could I get me some Fanta?" he asks and I nod, putting down my plate and utensils before heading to the kitchen.

I take the bottle of orange drink from the fridge and close it, looking down. The floor stares blankly back up at me and I shake my head. I pour the Fanta into the glass, put the bottle back and head to the living room.

"Thanks", Tav says as he takes the drink and sips it greedily like it's his first drink in days. I smile at the thought and continue my own food, standing by the kitchen door.

After eating I put the dishes away and return to Tav, sitting down on the couch and dragging him into my lap. He resists a bit but I won't have that and keep him there until he admits defeat and smiling leans against me, closing his eyes.

"Get well soon", I whisper into his ear and gently kiss his forehead.


	34. Chapter 34

**I'm so sorry I haven't updated in like forever! I've been busy drawing this thing and spending time with my friend and I just didn't get the chance to edit this. I'm so sorry!**

It's Saturday and I'm finally feeling better. I skipped school for the rest of the week partly because I was sick and partly because on Friday Gamzee wanted me to stay home and rest.

I'm really happy Gamzee doesn't work on Saturday's. I think he has a weird schedule, but it works, so I don't really care.

"Watcha wanna do today?" Gamzee asks after we both have finished eating our breakfasts.

"Could we please go to the shelter today?" I plead and Gamzee takes a second to think about it.

"Sure, why not", he says finally, not sounding really enthusiastic about the trip.

"Thanks", I say smiling and he smiles back at me.

"It's just a trip to see some four legged beasts", he says shrugging and I chuckle.

"When will we go?" I ask and he scratches his head.

"When does the shelter open?" he asks in return and I shrug.

"I think we should check that on my computer", I say and wheel myself to my room while Gamzee puts away the dishes.

I open my computer and Pesterchum automatically fires up. I start searching for the shelter's site on the net, but am quickly interrupted. Right now the bing of an incoming message is rather annoying.

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering adiosToreador

TG: Yo.

AT: oH, dAVE, hI,

AT: wHAT DO YOU, uHH, wANT?

TG: Just checking on you.

TG: Something wrong about that?

AT: uM, i GUESS NOT,

TG: How are you?

AT: dAVE, tHIS IS VERY UNCOMMON OF, uM, YOU,,

TG: What do you mean? I'm not always mean.

AT: tO ME YOU, uH, uSUALLY ARE,

AT: eSPECIALLY AFTER THE, uM, iNCIDENT,,,

TG: Oh yeah, sorry about that.

AT: w-WHAT?

TG: Sorry about the "me trying to molest you" thing.

AT: aRE YOU APOLIGIZING TO ME?

TG: Shit, I guess that's what I'm doing.

TG: Whatever. Hope you're happy with juggalo freak.

AT: dON'T CALL HIM THAT!

TG: Look at that, you're getting mad again.

AT: yOU'RE INSULTING gAMZEE AGAIN!

TG: Like he needes you to protect him.

AT: shut the fuck up before I crush your MOTHERFUCKING BONES!

adiosToreador ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG]

"G-gamzee! You scared me!" I say shivering a bit, still shocked of Gamzee who suddenly appeared behind me.

"You don't need to motherfucking talk to him", he growls and I flinch back. His expression changes immediately.

"Sorry, Tavbro, didn't mean to all up and motherfucking scare you", he says quietly looking away.

"Oh, it's nothing. Have you taken your, uhh, pills yet?" I ask kind of worried.

"I'll motherfucking get them right away", he says and I smile as he leaves.

I quickly find the site I'm looking for and confirm I remembered right. The shelter opens at eight o'clock, which means it's already open, and closes at nine p.m. I leave my laptop on and get into bed to wait for Gamzee. The chair was getting pretty tiring to sit in.

Gamzee comes back a while later and seems to be swaying a little.

"Oh, did you take a few pills too many?" I ask and Gamzee smiles.

"Nah, only two like the doctor all up and told me to", he answers walking to the bed and lying down next to me.

I smile and curl up next to him. He gently kisses my forehead and my smile widens. He keeps giving small kisses to my forehead. I smile and bend my head back, kissing him and his eyes open wide.

It takes him under a second to react and he's eagerly kissing me, pushing me back on the bed under him. I smile into the kiss and soon feel his tongue in my mouth exploring anything it can.

I do the same to him and let my fingers gently brush down his sides, feeling him shiver under my touch. He kisses me one more time before he leaves a trail of kisses down My jawline to My neck, gently sucking.

"Ugh, Gamzee, no", I say closing my eyes and he stops.

"Shit, bro, sorry", he says clearly worried he did something wrong.

"L-let's just leave it, uh, for later, okay?" I suggest and he nods, maybe a bit disappointed.

He sits up a bit farther away and I really feel sorry for him, but Dave's attempt is still haunting my mind and I don't want it to ruin Gamzee's and my first time, if that happens to come.

"Wanna go to the shelter now?" he breaks the silence and I smile, nodding right after.

"Sounds nice", I reply. He gets up and helps me into my wheelchair, pushing me all the way to his car.

Not too long after I find myself at the shelter, following a nice young lady to the animal cages.

"Here are all the animals available for adoption. At the moment we don't have too many, but I assure you they are all very nice!" she says and motions towards the cages. The dogs in the first three cages growl at Gamzee and all the cats seem to shy away from him or hiss at him, so I ignore them.

It's starting to look hopeless and even the lady helping us is getting confused.

"They don't usually act like this. I can't understand what's got into them!" she says and tries to get a golden retriever to stop growling.

"It's my fault", Gamzee says and walks to the last cage. He crouches down and looks in, but I can't see what he's looking at.

"This one's cute", he says looking at the dog. "It reminds me of you."


	35. Chapter 35

**To make up to the days I didn't update at all I'll just casually post as many chapters today as I can mange. Hope you don't mind.**

I stare into the cage and back at me stares a pair of big brown eyes. The dog seems to be a mix, or at least I can't recognize the breed. It doesn't growl at me, doesn't back away, but still stares at me like it might attack any given moment.

"It's, uh, very cute", Tav says from next to me and I get up from my previous crouching position.

"Would you like to take a closer look?" the woman asks and I want to say no, but Tav's faster.

"Yes please", he says and smiling the women opens the door and takes the excited dog out of there. She gives it to Tavros who has no problems holding it. It tries to lick his face, jumping up against him and gets him to laugh.

"Hey, Gamzee, do you wanna try petting it?" he asks and I hesitate before approaching the dog and holding out my hand towards it. It stops the jumping and stares at my hand, slowly coming to sniff it. It then growls and starts crouching reminding me of how my cats used to hunt mice.

I quickly pull my hand away and the dog relaxes once again wanting Tav to scratch it. This time, though, Tav doesn't and the dog starts whining.

"Oh my! I am so sorry!" the lady says grabbing the dog and putting it back in its cage.

"No problem. All the animals do that", I say smiling lazily and the woman glances at me before looking at Tav. "I'm afraid to say that was our last adoptable animal."

"Oh, it's nothing, we weren't going to, um, buy anything yet anyways", Tav says and the woman smiles kindly.

"Welcome back!" she yells after us and I roll my eyes.

"See? They don't like me, and I have no motherfucking clue as to why", I say as I help him into the car and get into the drivers place.

"Hey, could we go, uh, visit someone, now that we're out", he suggests and I think for a while before agreeing.

"Where to?" I ask him and he thoughtfully scratches his head.

"Do you know how to get to John's place?" Tav asks and I nod.

"It's the huge motherfucking mansion thing, isn't it?" I ask and he smiles.

"Sort of", he says and I grin.

"Then let's all up and get going!" I say and start the car.

After the ride, which was actually longer than I remembered it being, I pull over next to the yard of the rather big house.

"Here we are", I say and help Tav out of my car.

"Wonder what he thinks of us just showing up like this", Tav says sounding worried.

"Nah, he'll let us in", I try to assure him, and hope at the same time that this is really the case.

I go up to the door and knock just to hear the huge barking from inside. I freeze. Not good. Not good at all.

"Bec, stop it!" I hear from inside before the door is opened.

"Tavros! Gamzee! What a pleasant surprise!" John says smiling widely.

"Do you have a dog?" I ask sort of worried and scared.

"Yeah, Becquerel", he answers, frowning a bit. "Why? Are you afraid of them?"

"What breed is it?" I ask and he raises one eyebrow.

"It's a mix with some German Shepherd, Irish Wolfhound, some sort of retriever and part wolf."

I tense and Tav gasps. "W-wolf?"

"Yeah, but he's rally obedient", John says and I peek behind him, seeing the dog staring at me.

"Bro, mind closing the door?" I ask not letting my eyes off Bec, which is crouching behind John, fangs bared.

"What? Why?" he asks confused.

"No reason", I say pushing John in and slamming the door shut just in time before Bec jumps against it barking and growling.

I hear struggling and yelling from inside. It seems like more people came to help get the dog thing away from the door and soon enough John slips back out.

"Oh god! I'm sorry! He doesn't usually do this!" he stutters out an apology.

I wave it off but Tav seems to be really scared.

"God! Oh god, Gamzee, it could have attacked you!" he says voice rather high.

I sigh frustrated and look at John and Tav.

"I think we shouldn't go inside", I say after a while and both of them nod. "So what do we do now?"

"Oh, can I come too?" John asks surprised, but still smiling.

"Yeah, why not?" I say shrugging and he grins.

"We could go eat something", Tav suggests and we all agree to this.

"Let me just fetch my money", John says and returns in a few minutes with money and a jacket.

Once again I get in the wheel of my car and drive the three of us to some random place to eat at. We end up at McDonald's.

We order our food, find a table and start a conversation on latest music and video games. It soon goes to me talking about everything random and finally John looks at the two of us grinning.

"Have you told others yet?" he asks and I shake my head, getting some loose hair on my face.

"No, not yet", I say pushing the hair out of my eyes.

"But how did you find out?" Tav asks.

"Well, Karkat told me Gamzee likes you and I sort of figured it out. Oh, and also, since Dave somehow found out he's been spreading the rumor at school after you got sick", John explains and I frown.

"How could he, uh, do that?" Tav asks.

"Because he's a motherfucking ass hole", I growl.


	36. Chapter 36

**Okay, so this chapter is a bit saddish. But I'm proud of it. It's well written by my own standards. I don't know what you guys think but have it anyways.**

John flinches back at that and I quickly grab Gamzee's hand, gripping it gently. He looks at me and smiles faintly turning his gaze down on the table.

"Sorry bros. Don't know where that came from", he says quietly.

"Oh, no problem!" John says quickly, clearly a bit frightened. "But Dave isn't that bad all the time. When we lived in the same neighborhood he never did anything like this!"

"Well then he's mohterfucking changed. And to the worse", Gamzee says looking out the window onto the streets.

"I think he changed a while after, uh, moving here", I say and both of my companions look at me. "I-i mean I, uh, remember Dave being, um, nicer, earlier. To others. At that time we, uh, weren't really friends yet."

"And you're friends now?" Gamzee growls and I release his hand, pulling my own back.

It takes him a few seconds to realize what he just said. He then shakes his head and buries his face in his hands.

"John, can you drive?" he asks and John nods uncertainly. "Here are the keys to the car."

He puts down the car keys, gets up and walks off, exiting the restaurant. The two of us are left in a silence John finally decides to break.

"What just happened?" he asks and I sigh.

"I think Gamzee needs something more, uh, powerful", I admit. After a second John nods and gets up.

"Let's get you home, okay?" he says and I nod. It takes a bit more struggle getting me and my wheelchair into the car, but we succeed nonetheless and finally get to start the drive home. Oh am I happy John really knows how to drive a car.

"Thanks for bringing the car", I say and John smiles. "But, um, how are you getting home?"

John smiles widely and I look at him confused.

"I'll either walk or take the bus", he says cheerily. "Thanks for taking me with you two!"

I smile slightly as he waves a good bye and starts walking towards his house. I feel bad for not being able to drive him there, but I can't really do anything about it right now.

I go inside and get up to my apartment to wait for Gamzee, though I think he might not be back anytime soon.

wHERE ARE YOU?

I send the text to him as soon as I've closed the door and wheel to my room to wait.

SoMeWhErE i WoN't HuRt YoU. DoN't ExPeCt Me HoMe ToNiGhT.

I sigh as I read his text and put down my phone. I lean back in my wheelchair, feeling tired all ready, but refuse to go to sleep. I want Gamzee back.

I go over to the sofa where I lay down and stare at the black TV screen. Oh god do I wish Gamzee's all right. After laying there for a while I decide to do something. It's not even four o'clock yet.

To get to doing something useful I get back in my wheelchair and go to the kitchen. Maybe I could make some food for myself and Gamzee.

I don't really know what to make so I dig around the cabinets and whip up something simple, but edible. I take a plate of food for myself and put the rest into the fridge for Gamzee, if he's hungry when he comes back home.

I eat my meal and fall into my thoughts. Where would Gamzee go? Probably to one of those nightclubs he tells me about sometimes. But would he get drunk? That wouldn't be good. He could hurt someone. What if he hurt himself? I'm pretty sure I'd blame myself for not stopping him.

Then I start thinking back. Right after I stopped him in bed. He said he took two pills, that's the right amount. How come he was acting so weird then? Where the pills old? Or did he really need something stronger?

I put the dishes on the table, not feeling like putting them away properly. I wheel to my room and start up my computer, digging out some paper and a pencil while waiting for the slow device.

Finally it opens up and I check Pesterchum, which is pretty much empty. I open up the internet and go to YouTube to look for songs. I don't know how, but I end up listening to Perfect Two.

While the song plays I start sketching something. The song ends too quickly, though, and I put it on repeat. Don't say anything; I'm just too lazy to keep switching the song.

I continue the sketch and it ends up being a bit saddish, but still nice. It pretty much has me and Gamzee holding hands once more, but this time it's at the edge of a cliff. Why did I draw this again? I put a few words of the song on the background, into the stars of the sky.

Sighing I put the paper down and put my head down on the table. I don't even realize falling asleep, but I jerk awake in the middle of the night. I bury my face in my hands and try to get the trembling to calm down. It was just a bad dream. Just a bad dream.

I take a deep breath and look around. Still no Gamzee. I grab my phone with trembling hands and write the text to Gamzee.

pLEASE COME HOME, i'M SCARED,,,

I swallow the lump in my throat and get into bed. I take off everything but my boxers and bury down under the covers, pulling them up to my ears. I don't want that terrifying nightmare to come back.

I wake up for the second time that night, but not to a nightmare this time. It's the slightly uneasy breathing next to me that gets me up.

I examine the figure there and find it to be Gamzee, sitting on the floor, head and arms on my bed, apparently asleep.

I tug at his shirt and he jerks awake, looking at me. His makeup is totally ruined and he seems to have been crying.

"Gamzee?" I whisper and he stares back at me, not saying anything.

"Come here", I say and pull him up into my bed. This might not be the best of my ideas, but I hope it will get Gamzee happier.

I gently kiss him and he answers the kiss almost desperate, like this might be a dream and he'd wake up any given moment.

I gently pull at his shirt and the way he rips it off tells me I can't go back anymore. It's now or never.


	37. Chapter 37

**Warning. Warning.**

**If you are uncomfortable with poorly written smut do not read past this point. To skip the scene skip this whole chapter. Don't worry, you won't miss out on too much. *cough cough cannot write smut cough***

**Anyways, here's the rated M scene and it's my first time for this sort of thing so I have no idea how it turned out.**

**Enjoy, I guess :D**

I can't help myself as I push him back and hungrily attack his mouth again.

Fine, I've wanted this for so long, I might possibly be a bit drunk and I definitely should have taken my pills again. But he's so willing. He's the one that started this.

I'm now on top of him, kissing him, caressing his skin, exploring any bit I can reach. My tongue swipes over his lower lip and he grants me entrance. I start exploring his mouth while my other hand goes lower, closer.

I feel him shiver under me and smile into the kiss, pulling away. He's about to say something, but the words are choked down by my hand barely stroking his member through his boxers. I take this opportunity to attack his neck with bites and licks.

While I'm busy teasing him I barely notice his hands, and suddenly my pants are pulled off down as far as he gets them. I grin and get up to take them and my boxers off all the way, ripping off his boxers while I'm at it.

I take a look at Tav's appearance. He's beautiful, face flushed and very hard at this point. Not that I'm not.

I get back on top of him, kissing him and grinding against him, mind too hazy to really care. He moans into my mouth and I swallow the sounds he makes.

All of a sudden he grips my erection and starts slowly pumping me. A sudden gasp followed by a throaty moan escapes my mouth and I have to do all I can to stay up and not crush him under myself. He nips at my lower lip and keeps pumping, though it's unbearably slow.

I jerk my hips forward desperate for more friction and close my eyes, dropping my head down on Tav's shoulder, unable to concentrate.

His hand grabs my side and- Whoa he's strong. We're flipped over, so now Tav's on top of me, never stopping his hand. I moan again and he kisses at my neck, imitating what I was doing earlier.

I arch my back, digging my fingers into the bed sheets. The pace is still too slow, though, and I growl quietly, which makes Tav grin against my neck.

"Faster", I grunt stealing a glance at him and he bites at my neck, sucking at it slightly. Gradually he starts picking up the pace and I groan, closing my eyes again.

He's pumping me, kissing me, caressing my skin with his other hand and the thought that I'm doing nothing to him sneaks into my head. I pull his head up and kiss him again pushing my tongue into his mouth.

He tightens his grip around my erection and I groan again. He pushes his tongue into my mouth and I lose control of the kiss. Not willing to go down this easy I sneak my other hand down and grip his erection in return. And I'm not going to tease.

He groans and once again I'm in control, smiling slightly against the kiss. He can barely keep himself up and I flip both of us over, once again on top of him. I resist the urge to grind down against him and concentrate instead on pumping him, keeping up with the pace he's pumping me at.

I can feel the heat already coiling in my stomach. I'm so close, but I have no idea about Tav. And I don't want to come before him.

I quicken my pace, occasionally swiping my thumb over the top of his cock and he arches his back, pressing against me. All the contact I've been dreaming of is right there, right now, and it's almost enough to drive me over the edge.

"I-I'm gonna-"

I cut him off with a kiss, pumping him faster and he does the same to me. I can feel him tense under I and I'm so close. So close.

I pull back and bite down on the crook of his neck.

"G-gamzee!" he moans as he comes and I'm not far behind, groaning his name.

I collapse on top of him, unable to hold myself up anymore and roll next to him on the bed. Both of us are panting, trying to catch our breaths and for a few seconds all I can hear is the hard breathing and the beating of my heart.

I snake my arms around him and pull him closer to me, not caring about the mess for now. There's time for cleaning in the morning.

"I love you", I whisper in his ear.

"I-I love you too", he answers and I close my eyes, immediately falling into a peaceful sleep.


	38. Chapter 38

**Last chapter for tonight. That would make a total of five chapters today. And hopefully a few more tomorrow so I could get to writing the new story as soon as possible.**

**As always, reviews are welcome and I wouldn't mind if you pointed out things I could do better next time.**

I wake up and the images from last night flood my mind, making me blush and cover my face with my hands. I recall all the amazing feelings and for some reason feel like giggling like a school girl with her first crush.

I decide to check the time. I'm not sure what I'm expecting, but it must not be too early. I'm not even that tired.

It's half past ten. Time to get up.

"Gamzee~", I whisper in his ear, stroking some hair from in front of his eyes. He groans, but doesn't otherwise react to me.

"Come on, it's already past ten", I say a bit louder, poking his back. In response he curls into a ball.

"Oh please", I chuckle and keep poking him until he turns onto his back. I kiss him gently and when it ends he opens his eyes, smiling a bit.

"Morning", he says still a bit groggy.

"Finally", I say and poke him again. He quickly grabs me and pulls me down against his chest, which gets both of us to start laughing. After the laughter dies down I sit up and look around the room. Both of our clothes are somewhere on the floor, rather close to the bed. Before I can really do any attempt to reach my boxers Gamzee gets up and throws them to me. I gladly take them and pull them on.

"I think I'll go take a shower", he says as I get into my wheelchair.

"Sure", I say smiling after him and cover my face with my hands again. I can't believe I've really done it now. Of course I wasn't a virgin, but I've never done anything of that sort with another man before.

I hear the shower start and wheel to the window, staring out onto the roads. It's rather quiet, but I'd only figure as much. It is Sunday after all. I can see a few people out walking, some with each other, some with dogs, and others with children. I sigh. I will probably never be able to do that with anyone.

Then a sudden idea strikes me. I must go out today. And without Gamzee.

I take the shower after Gamzee and try to think of a reason to go out without him. A walk wouldn't work, he'd definitely want to come with me. And he'd drive me if I wanted to go shopping. I sigh, a bit frustrated. Nothing seemed to work.

And suddenly it hit me like a strike of lightning.

"Gamzee, I was thinking", I start off and look at him next to me on the couch, "You could, uh, go see the doctor."

He frowns, turning his eyes to me.

"Why's that?" he asks, sounding a bit out of character.

"Well, I think you, um, might need stronger medicine. You've been acting sort of weird lately", I explain, trying to make it sound believable. Gamzee stares at me for a good while before he sighs, closes his eyes and leans back on the couch.

"I'm sorry, Tav", he says and now it's my turn to frown.

"Sorry for what?" I ask inching closer.

"For everything. I've all up and scared you more than you motherfucking need to be scared. I've scared John, almost wrecked our house and I have no motherfucking clue how you're still here, next to me, not even to mention why we did what we did last night."

I blush at the mention of last night but don't want to say anything, so I just nod slowly and wait for him to continue.

"You're scared of me, aren't you? I need stronger meds, because those don't keep my issues under control. You don't need to worry about it. I'm gonna go see the doctor today if possible. You don't need my problems on top of yours. You're always so nice and friendly to everyone, and I was really taken aback you would do against your nature and hit Strider just 'cause he called me a juggalo. I don't deserve you, I really don't. You deserve someone better. I'll eventually just hurt you."

I grab his face and force him to look at me.

"Stop it", I say sternly and he blinks, staring at me like he's seeing me clearly for the first.

"What?" he asks confused.

"Stop that stupid talk. You have your flaws, but so do I. I help you, you help me. I love you, you love me", I say keeping his face towards Myself.

"But-"

"No! Gamzee, I love you. To me you couldn't be more perfect", I snap. He still looks like he's going to protest, but I don't give him the chance. I quickly, but gently kiss him and he stares at me, finally shutting his mouth. I let his face go and smile, stroking some hair from in front of his face.

"You're right. I shouldn't talk like this. I'll just grab a few pills and go straight to the doctor", Gamzee says grinning. He ruffles my hair and gets up. After he disappears into the bathroom I climb into my wheelchair and wheel to my room to grab my phone and some money.

"You going somewhere?" Gamzee asks from behind me as he grabs his hoodie from a chair.

"Yeah. I was, um, thinking of going out. Maybe grab something to, uh, eat while I'm at it", I say smiling and Gamzee nods.

"Just don't do like I do and stay out all night", he says grinning and I chuckle slightly.

"Of course not. Bye", I say and he waves to me before closing the door. I take out my cell and open a new text message.

i,uH, nEED A FAVOUR,, cAN I COME OVER?

I send the message to Equius and get a response pretty quickly. I was not really sure if I expected for him to say yes, but that's what he said and I'm fine with it.

I get out of my apartment, lock the door and wheel to the elevator. I have the lady from the floor below as my company.

"Morning Tavros!" she says smiling sweetly at me. I greet her and let her talk until I get to the bottom floor. I say good bye to her and wheel out, heading for the bus stop. There's no way I'm going over to Equius's place by myself.


	39. Chapter 39

**Got some time now to edit these, but I'm not sure about today. Maybe again in the evening, I don't know.**

**But hopefully you enjoy!**

I have to carry Tavros and his wheelchair down to my basement, but of course it doesn't pose any sort of problem to me.

"Thanks again, Equius, for helping me", he says when I put him back in his wheelchair and I wave it off.

"Now what did you want exactly?" I ask walking over to my workbench.

"Um, I'd like some prosthetic legs", he says quietly and I scrunch my eyebrows.

"Those will either be hard to get or take a while to make. And they won't be cheap", I say picking up a screwdriver for no specific reason.

"I know. I've, um, saved money", he says and I spin the screwdriver in my hand as if examining it.

"Well, I can start working on them, if you wish. And possibly give some discount. But I'm warning you, it might take very long", I say and he nods.

"I'm ready to wait", he says, sounding very determined.

"Good. I'll start working on them tomorrow. Roughly estimated it will take around three months to get them ready. We can talk about the price after I finish them", I say swiping some sweat from my forehead. I really should get that stupid fan down here. It was steaming hot.

"Thanks. I don't know what I'd, uh, do without you!" Tavros says clearly relieved. Yes, it would be a pain in the ass to have to look for prosthetics in this town.

"It's no problem. A challenge like that can't be resisted", I say and he smiles. I help him up and offer some tea like Nepeta always does. I wonder where she is. She better not be in bed at this time anymore. It would be most uncommon for her.

"Where's Nepeta?" Tavros asks as he grabs his cup of tea and blows on the hot liquid.

"I think she is upstairs, but I'm not a hundred percent sure", I say glancing towards the stairs.

"It would be, uh, nice to see her", Tavros says smiling. My rather childlike cousin doesn't usually ignore visitors, especially when they are close friends.

"I think I will go up and see what she is up to. Do you mind?" I ask and Tavros quickly shakes his head, though I think he would let me go even if he was here to tell me he was going to die from cancer. He's always so kind to everyone.

I put my tea down and get up, walking over to the stairs. I ascend and decide to head to her room first. I gently knock on the door and open it, peeking in.

"Nepeta, why are you here all alone?" I ask her. I walk across the room to where she is sitting at the computer.

"Hmm? Oh hi Equius", she says smiling and swivels around in her chair to face me.

"Tavros is here. I was wondering if you wanted to come down and greet him", I say and she glances at the clock.

"Goodness, what time it is already! I'm so sorry, I didn't realize the time fly by", she says frowning a bit. "Of course I'll come. Just give me a second."

"I will go keep Tavros company. It would be rude of me to have him sit there all alone", I say, smile at her and go back down.

"So she, uh, was there?" he asks and I nod, grabbing the cup of tea, which has unfortunately cooled down a bit.

"She will be coming down soon", I say and Tavros smiles. A small silence falls between the two of us and is broken by Nepeta's running footsteps on the stairs.

"Tavros!" she screams and rushes over to hug the poor boy.

"Nepeta! It's, uh, been a while", Tavros says hugging her back and finally she let's go.

"It's so nice to see you again! What could have brought you here?" she asks smiling sweetly and starts searching the cupboards, most likely for something small to eat.

"I needed to, uh, ask Equius a favor", he says and I nod, even though I haven't been asked and Nepeta has her back to me at the moment.

"Oh, did he agree to help?" Nepeta asks and I am pretty sure she's grinning at the moment.

"Um, yes, yes he did", Tavros answers.

"Well that's very nice of him!" she says pulling out a jar of cookies and spreads them on a plate. They are the kitty cookies the two of us made a while back. I'd say they worked out pretty well, even though you can clearly tell which were made by Nepeta and which by me.

We enjoy the cookies and tea while talking about things like school and work. The subject also comes across pets and we all start telling about the pets we've had before.

"I used to have lots of cats! My parents loved cats and they had like at least ten at a time", Nepeta says giggling.

"My parents had a dog when I was little, but it died when I was five", Tavros says.

"Aww", Nepeta pats his hair affectionately and Tavros smiles.

"We had two horses where I grew up", I say and Nepeta grins.

"Of course you did!" she says giggling.

"The other was mine. It was black and big and needed to be handled with determination and strength. Others had lots of trouble with it. It had to be sold, though, after I moved away", I explain.

We continue to different subjects and soon Tavros calls Gamzee to come pick him up. And it definitely doesn't take long enough for Gamzee to arrive.

I open the door and in front of me stands a grown man, almost as tall as me with his tangled hair and clown make-up.

"Hiya Equius! Looking good!" he says grinning and I huff, moving to the side to let Tavros outside.

"I could say the same to you", I say and he grins.

"Still sore about that stupid mistake of mine?" he asks and I look away to hide my slight blush.

"What mistake?" Nepeta asks curiously looking from me to Gamzee and back.

"It was something I did when we were all up and dating. Man, it must have been 8 years ago or something. Well, I got a bit drunk and went off with some other guy. Ditched Equius for him and I guess it was really stupid of me. I couldn't get him back after it, even though I apologized like a hundred motherfucking times", Gamzee says shrugging and I frown.

"I would rather not talk about it", I say and he smiles at me.

"The past is the past, you'd better let it go sooner or later", he says and I sigh, nodding and wave them off.

"I had no idea you and Gamzee had been dating!" Nepeta says grinning and I sigh again.

"I wish we would talk about it later", I say and retreat down to the basement.


	40. Chapter 40

**Okey dokey, last one for the morning. Got to be going to school soon!**

"Gamzee, I had no idea!" Tavros says from next to me in the car. I chuckle slightly.

"If I'd tell you about all my motherfucking boyfriends it would take hours to finish the list. And you'd most likely start to question my loyalty", I say still grinning.

"Boyfriends? You mean you, uh, have never dated a girl?" he asks and I full out laugh on the remark.

"No, I haven't. You could say Equius was my first love or some shit like that", I say and Tavros stares at me.

"Oh, so you, um, have always been gay?" he asks and I arch one eyebrow.

"Yes, didn't I just tell you?" I ask chuckling slightly.

"I, never knew, really", he says looking out of the window.

"We never motherfucking talked about it", I say shrugging. "We can if you want to."

"Uh, yeah, I think it, um, might be a good idea. Or not. I, don't really know", Tav says and I laugh again.

"You know you're cute when you stutter, right?" I say and he blushes.

"I-I am?" he asks and I nod, parking the car.

I help him out of the car and back into his wheelchair. I push him to the elevator and whisper sweet nothings into his ear, making him giggle once in a while.

I continue this in our apartment after I close the door. I pick him up, totally abandoning the wheelchair and carry him to the couch. I find a few loose blankets and bring them over to him. I put them aside for a second just to pull the puzzled taurian next to me onto my lap and cover the both of us with blankets.

"What is it now, Gamzee?" he asks confused, but smiling anyways.

"Shh, just motherfucking cuddles now", I say smiling and nuzzle my nose in his hair.

I stay like that for a while and start to feel a bit sleepy, but suddenly remember we had something to talk about.

"So, what did you all up and want to talk about?" I ask and Tav twists in my lap enough to look at me.

"Um, I don't really know", he admits and I smile.

"Something about my love life?" I ask grinning and he blushes.

"Y-yeah, if it isn't too private", he says.

"Well, I've always been into men. Women don't attract me like that. It's like, I don't really know. They just don't", I start. "I've never minded, though. Like I said, Equius was my first love or something. We were together for like a motherfucking year. They were some nice times. Then I went and messed it up."

I stop for a second to actually think about what I did that day. Yeah, it was idiotic of me. But I was young. We make mistakes when we're young.

"Uh, do you, mind continuing?" Tav asks and I chuckle.

"Sure thing. So, after that I dated a few guys you wouldn't know. And then I guess I was with Sollux for a while. Well, it didn't really work out so we ended it. Later we became good friends. And then there's the period I was mostly dating. Like left one guy for another and got back with those I motherfucking broke up with", I frown a bit. That sounds stupid. "And then it all stopped when I turned 18 and motherfucking fell for a guy."

"Oh. Do you, um, mind me asking, who'd you fall for?" he asks and I grin.

"I fell for you", I say and gently kiss him. I pull away and he has this weird look on his face, like he's not sure if he should be pleased or mad at himself. I frown. "Did I do something wrong?"

"Oh no! You didn't do anything!" he says quickly attempting to smile.

"Then what's wrong?" I ask and he looks down.

"I... I don't know. I-I've never thought of myself, um, as anything, really", he stutters.

"You don't need to motherfucking think like that", I say cupping his chin and turning his face towards me. "To me you're perfect."

This seems to strike a bell in Tav's head since he immediately sharpens and looks at me.

"You did go to see the doctor, right?" he asks and I nod. "Did he give you anything?"

"Yeah, he gave me stronger pills. They shouldn't make me fall over every time I try to go somewhere, but they should keep my motherfucking issues under control", I say and he nods, smiling again.

"That's good, right?" he asks and I nod, pulling him better onto my lap.

"Yes, it's good. I don't want to hurt you", I say and he smiles.

"I know you'd would never hurt me", he says and leans forward to grab the remote. I help him stay on the couch and then we start flipping through channels. I've got no hurries today, so might as well spend the rest of the evening together on the couch.

I wake up to the door closing and groan. What time is it? I check my alarm clock. It's pretty early, but not early enough. Tav already left. I groan again and let my head fall back into the pillow. No need to get up just yet.

I wake up again later. Fuck, I didn't mean to fall asleep. But I don't mind either.

I slowly get up and find some clothes to pull on. A dark purple hoodie with skeleton marks and some loose black pants. I then apply my makeup for no specific reason and start thinking if I might go visit someone. No use spending the whole day alone.

After eating breakfast and pondering it for a moment I decide to go visit Sollux again. And maybe even borrow a book today.


	41. Chapter 41

**How do I Vriska. I don't know, I think I don't write her so well.**

**Whatever, enjoy!**

I'm back to school again, after what, five days? Yes, that's about right. I hope no one will talk about me hitting Dave, since now that I think about it it wasn't the smartest thing I could have done.

"So you finally got your lazy ass up and came back?" I hear Karkat's familiar voice from behind me and turn around.

"Uh, yeah, that's a way to say it", I say and he stares at me for a second.

"Whatever. Dave's been a real bitch since you got sick. I assume now you did get sick. He started a rumor about you and Gamzee being together and it's spread like wildfire", he explains.

I stare at him for a second, not coming up with anything to say and he sighs a bit frustrated.

"Karkat, I think you broke him", John says chuckling as he walks up to the two of us.

"I just told him the fucking reality", Karkat huffs, crossing his arms. John furrows his brows and glances at me.

"You mean Dave and his rumors? I already told him", John says.

"What? When?" Karkat asks surprised.

"Well, we hung out on the weekend", John says shrugging. "It's not that big of a deal."

"Hmph. Well at least he knows now", Karkat says. "In case he forgot."

"Haha, I don't think his memory is that bad, really. More like Gamzee would have forgotten. Speaking of which, how is he?" John asks turning to face me.

"Uh, good, I think. Nothing really, um, out of ordinary", I say blushing a bit at the memory from a few nights before.

"Well that's nice", John says apparently oblivious to My expression, though Karkat seems to notice and gives me a look like he's asking "Seriously?". I look down and he huffs again, a bit frustrated.

John starts a new conversation and I just follow them towards my first period. I drop off at my class and say good bye, sitting there alone.

I make it through the first few periods without being teased too much. A few small insults, one guy calling me a fag, nothing worse. I can cope with that. I go to the cafeteria to get lunch and wonder were Dave might be. I haven't seen him around and he certainly will want to insult me himself. Or at least I suspect so. I really don't want to think so badly of him.

I wheel through the empty corridors just to bump into Vriska at the next corner.

"Hey Toreadork", she says grinning. "Heard you're going out with juggalo-freak."

"He's not a juggalo", I say and Vriska looks at me amused.

"What did you just say?" she asks and I shrink back in my chair. "Did you just say something against me?"

"H-he's not a juggalo", I say and Vriska leans down, face almost touching mine.

"I don't care. I can still call him whatever the fuck I want, and you can't do anything about it", she snarls and I look down. "Oh, come on, don't be such a wimp. You hit Dave, what keeps you from hitting me?"

"It was w-wrong to hit Dave", I mumble.

"Or are you afraid of hitting a girl?" she snorts and I chew at my bottom lip.

"Come on, say something", she sneers and pushes me back so I hit the wall. I stare up at her as she closes in on me again and wonder why there was nobody in the corridor.

"W-what are you, uh, g-going to do?" I ask timidly and she bursts out laughing.

"It depends on you. So, you really dating that clown freak or is it just something Dave came up with to get back at you?" she demands to know.

"I-it's true", I say barely over a whisper.

I look up at her and I can see the rage in her eyes. She's staring at me, making me freeze. What did I do wrong now?

"You are dating that jack ass?" she screams and I flinch back. "You can't be fucking serious!"

I don't dare say a word in fear of prodding her on. She might hit me, or do something even worse.

"You asshole! Fucking idiot!" she keeps screaming and I'm really starting to get frightened. Suddenly she stops screaming, backs up and I'm really hoping she will just leave me when she kicks my wheelchair hard enough to make me fall over.

"See you later, Toreadumbass", she sneers and storms off, leaving me on the floor.

I lay there for a second before sitting up and sighing. I rub my head gently where it hit the ground and try to get the will to get my wheelchair up. I just don't feel like it.

"Oh my god, are you okay?" I hear John before actually seeing him.

"Uh, yeah, I'm okay", I say turning my head around to see him running towards me. He stops beside me and looks at me worried.

"I was looking for you when you didn't show up to lunch and I find you on the floor. What even happened?" he asks. I explain it all while he helps me get back in my chair and he frowns.

"Vriska really did that?" he asks and I nod.

"Yeah, she never seemed to, uh, really like me", I say and John nods slightly.

"Has she done this to you often?" he asks.

"Uh, many times. She always bullies me", I answer.

"Have you ever thought about telling on her?" John asks.

"I did tell on her at first, but, uh, they don't believe me. And when they do, she usually, um, gets me back for it", I explain.

"You should really stand up for yourself more often", John says.

"Well, I sort of can't do that anyways", I say looking down.

"Sorry! Didn't mean to say it like that!" he apologizes after noticing what he said.

"I know", I say smiling. "But I think we should go, next period will start eventually", I say as a few kids walk past us.

"Yes, that's a good idea. Let's go", he says, walks behind me and starts wheeling me to the next class.


	42. Chapter 42

**Oh, I know these chapters are short, but stay with me. It's over in a few chapters and I'll start writing longer chapters, if I can manage that.**

I take my old pills, since I still need to wait a few days to get the new ones and start walking towards the library. I don't feel like taking my car. Besides, a bit of fresh air couldn't hurt.

I shove my hands into the pockets of my dark purple hoodie and start the walk to the library in no particular hurry. I enjoy the small miracles of life, watching butterflies and birds, saying good morning to those I meet and continue on, not caring about anything at the moment.

The walk to the library takes around half an hour, but I don't mind. I walk through the doors, but instead of going to the counter like I usually do I merely say hello to the lady standing there and walk on, looking for books with interesting enough titles or covers to catch my attention.

I absent-mindedly pull out a few books, look through them and put them back, pulling out new ones. I approach the end of one shelf and look around the corner to see Sollux talking with Dave. If my murderous stare hadn't been locked on Dave I would have noticed they were rather enjoying themselves and maybe I would have thought to ask why Dave was here and not at school.

A low growl escapes my lips and I manage scare myself, stepping behind the shelf, leaning on it and closing my eyes. No, I can't fight him. Not here. I don't even have a reason to touch him.

"I could come over today after work. We could check what'th wrong with it and maybe do thomething to get it to work again", I hear Sollux's lisping voice approach me and quickly pull out a book, staring at the back cover of it, trying to understand what I'm reading.

To my disappointment Sollux notices me and approaches me, Dave on his heels.

"Hi Gamz, what are you doing here?" he asks and I look up from the book.

"What do you usually motherfucking do here. Looking for some shit to read", I answer calmly, smiling a bit lopsidedly.

"I didn't know you could even read", Dave smirks, but I ignore him.

"Need help finding thomething?" Sollux asks, glancing sternly at Dave.

"I think I can find something on my own, thanks", I say, wanting them to leave already. Or at least Dave could leave.

"What do you even read? The history of juggalos or ICP books?" he asks and my jaw clenches. It takes me everything I have not to attack him then and there. This doesn't go unnoticed from Sollux and his expression changes from happy to worried in a second.

"Dave, thtop it", Sollux warns him. "Let'th go."

"Wait, now I know. How to have sex with a cripple."

Sollux doesn't have time to stop me and Dave flies back from the force of my hit. His glasses fall on the floor in front of me and I stare down at him with a murderous look in my eyes.

"Don't you ever call Tavros a cripple ever again. If you do as much as look at him wrong I will motherfucking kill you with my bare hands!" I growl and Dave backs up, frightened.

"Gamz, pleathe, thtop it", Sollux pleads, pulling at my arm.

"Don't. Touch me", I growl and he instantly releases my hand, stepping back a few steps. I return my gaze to Dave and he's staring back, trying to hide his fear.

"You're a freak", he says.

I look down at his glasses and pick them up, examining them. I notice Dave tense and grin.

"Say it again", I demand holding the glasses carefully with both hands. He stays quiet, though and I chuckle darkly. "Well look at that, the though boy Strider has lost his tongue."

"You're a freak!" he shouts.

The glasses snap clean in half and drop to the ground. I crush the lenses under my foot and grin down at the younger Strider.

"You broke my glasses", he says bluntly and I laugh.

"Come on bro, they're just glasses. You can always buy a new motherfucking pair." I mock.

"John gave me those glasses", he says expression unreadable.

"Woah there Strider, I think your emotions are showing", I keep mocking him and he gets up faster than I can react. We both fall back on the ground, but it doesn't take much for me to get him off of myself. I get back to my feet and turn to look at him, grabbing his fist only a few centimeters from my face. I twist it behind his back and push him farther striking him in the face the moment he turns around.

"Oh for God'th thake Gamze thtop!" I hear Sollux scream next to me, jumping in between me and Dave.

"Out of the way", I sneer, but Sollux doesn't move.

"Pleathe, Gamz, don't. You'll get in trouble", he pleads.

"I said get out of the way", I repeat myself stepping closer.

"I know he detherveth thith, but you have to thtop. Tav won't want you getting in trouble", he tries.

"I told you to move you pathetic lisping wimp!" I shout and he stares at me, mouth open not able to move a muscle.

I barely notice Dave as he slips past Sollux hitting me in the chest and I back a step. A grin stretches across my face as Dave stares at me, glasses no longer hiding the fear in his eyes. Oh he's right to be scared.

"You'll have to motherfucking try if you want to do a fucking thing!" I sneer and he charges at me again. I grab his fist, hit him in the guts and he falls back, gasping for breath.

"Never insult Tavros while I'm there, got it? Do it one more time and I promise I'll single-handedly beat you to death", I growl, walking past him and the staring people, out of the building and storm back to my apartment.

The red in my sight starts to fade out as I walk on the streets and I take a deep breath, collecting my thoughts. Okay, so I just beat Strider in a library, broke his property and probably insulted Sollux in the worst way possible.

Maybe I'll call Kanaya and tell her I'm not coming to work tomorrow.

I really need those new pills.


	43. Chapter 43

**So this is from Vriska's POV, and I'm pretty sure I can't write as her. Haha.**

I push past the other students, causing a few to fall over. But I don't care. I'm so pissed right now. I just want to get out of this stupid building, find someone worthy of my time and plan my revenge.

I storm my way to my house, not bothering to take the bus since I'd only be surrounded by stupid assholes and smash the door closed after me, probably annoying all my neighbors.

Simply put I don't give a fuck.

I open my computer and get something to eat while waiting for the slow device. I play around with my dice as Pesterchum automatically opens up and I check who are on. No one interesting. Should have known. I open up the internet and start going through all sorts of pictures and sites to get my mind off of school.

God I still can't believe Tavros is really dating that stupid clown! It's so unfair! How come that idiot gets Tavros? I'm smarter, better looking and I most definitely had known Tavros longer than him. Ugh! It was so unfair!

And Gamzee was like Tav's second boyfriend. Even Dave had dated him. And I hadn't.

Suddenly I get a brilliant idea. I have to find Dave.

I dig out my cellphone and text Dave, asking where he is. At first he doesn't seem like he's going to answer, but then my phone signals an incoming message.

Why do you ask?

I grin and text him again, finally getting the response I wanted. I get up, take my phone, keys and some money with me and go out, starting to walk at a quick pace towards Strider's apartment building.

I arrive at the foot of the huge building and wonder why they even live here. The thing must be like 58 stories high. And of course the Strider's live at the very top.

I sigh and walk through the doors. Lucky the elevator is invented; otherwise I'd never agree to go to his place. The elevator doors open and a few people come out before I can get in and choose the correct floor. The ride up seems to take hours, but I finally get out of the small cubicle thing and to the right door.

I barely have time to knock before the door is opened by Dave and he stares at me.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" he asks and I grin, pushing past him into the apartment.

"I have a plan and it includes you", I say throwing a few stupid looking smuppets off the couch and into a corner of the room, sitting down in their place.

"What's the plan about?" he asks and I lean back, making myself comfortable.

"Payback. I want revenge on Gamzee", I say shortly and he nods.

"I'm in. What did you have in mind?" he asks, standing near the couch. I look up at him and smile.

"I thought we could work something out. So, first of all we can't probably beat him in a fight", I say.

"Tried it, didn't work out too well", Dave says, never breaking his cool kid poker face.

"Oh, so you fought with the juggalo?" I ask grinning.

"Yeah. In the library today", he says.

"No wonder you weren't in school. Too ashamed to come after getting beaten I'm guessing?" I say raising one eyebrow and he shakes his head.

"I wasn't going to come anyways", he says and I frown.

"Why not?" I ask kind of curious.

"I have my reasons. So get on with the plan", he says and I nod.

"Of course. Now, I think the only real way to get to him is by hurting something or someone he loves", I say and Dave's expressionless mouth twitches towards a smile.

"Like what?" he asks.

"Like Tavros. If we could get them both into the same place, without making it a meeting and then either of us just went and kissed Tavros I'm sure it would crush the juggalo", I explain.

"Or crush either of us. I called Tav a cripple and he beat the living fuck out of me", Dave points out and my smile drops.

"Oh. Well, we could do something that wouldn't get us in the picture", I suggest.

"Yeah, that won't be hard to pull off at all, will it?" he says sarcastically and I glare at him.

"If you won't do anything to help me on this I'll just leave", I say, getting up.

"Come on. It's not like you can go to anyone else for help. Besides, I'm keeping you from killing yourself now", he says and I sigh.

"I can do it on my own."

"We both know neither of us could. So sit down. I'll grab some Faygo and we can really start thinking about this.

"Fine", I say sitting back down and wait for the drinks to come. I grin to myself. So Dave is definitely with me in this. That's good.

He comes back in a few seconds with two glasses and a bottle of orange Faygo. I pour some for myself and hand Dave the bottle back, sipping the drink.

"Well, I think we should still do something to Tavros. Maybe not anything that would get us in the line of fire, but still something. I'm pretty sure the freak doesn't care about anything else", I ponder.

"You might be on to something there. That shithead is really out of his mind. What do you think if we made Tav's life living hell in school?" Dave suggests and a wide grin spreads across my face.

"I think I have something better. We should invite him to a night club. We could offer him a drink or two, do pretty much anything to him and in the end he won't remember it. Added bonus is that Gamzee will have to cope with it", I say and Dave nods.

"Yes, that might work. When, though?"

"Well we'll have to wait for a perfect time, but hopefully it comes pretty soon", I say and get up.

"Leaving already?" Dave asks not bothering to even move.

"Yes. I have all my irons in the fires. I'm a busy woman. Later", I grin and leave the apartment. Hopefully it won't be too long before I can put this brilliant plan into motion.


	44. Chapter 44

**It's gonna be over soon. Just a bit more and we're there. Probably not getting all of it ready today, though.**

I get out of the bus and take the elevator up. I take my keys out but find the door is unlocked. It's actually cracked open a bit.

"Oh my", I whisper and open the door, carefully wheeling myself in.

"Gamzee? Are you, uh, home?" I ask as I close the door behind me. I hear a grunt from the bedroom and start wheeling toward it. I drop my schoolbag next to the couch and look around. It's like a hurricane had gone through. The couch is a mess, all the stuff on the tables is now on the floor and everything possible is thrown somewhere. Luckily nothing has broken as of yet, not including a few scratches here and there.

Horrorstruck I stare at the living room for a while, wondering whether I dare or not go look at the bedroom. Did Gamzee do this?

I slowly open the door to my bedroom and see Gamzee leaning against my desk, smiling at me.

"Hello sweet ass Tavbro. How was it at motherfucking school?" he slurs out, stumbling a bit on his words.

"Uh, it was okay, I guess. W-what have you been, um, up to?" I ask looking around the bedroom. The sheets are almost torn, ripped off the beds and pillows are all over the place. My laptop is dangerously close to falling onto the floor and I can even see some ripped papers. Probably my drawings, since the drawer is open.

"Nothin' much. Took a walk and can' really remember anythin' past that", he says, still sounding pretty high.

"And what happened to, uh, our place?" I ask glancing around once again. I watch as Gamzee slowly looks around and finally lands his gaze on me.

"I think I might have something to motherfucking do with it", he almost purrs and I flinch a bit.

"You tore down our house?" I ask, sort of shocked.

"I guess I motherfucking all up and did", Gamzee answers, eyes never leaving my face.

"Why would you ever, um, do that?" I ask. Maybe he's taken too many pills again.

"Got mad", he shrugs like it's nothing.

"You got mad? W-what happened?" I ask, now worried. Either the pills he takes really don't affect him anymore or he really got angry at someone. And I might just know who.

"Strider all up and called you names, so I beat the living shit out of him", he answers calmly.

"Oh my god! W-where did you d-do this?" I ask, horrified.

"At the library. I was gonna motherfucking visit Solbro, but Strider was there and I got mad at him. So I beat him up and motherfucking left him there. Then I came home and there's a mohterfucking blank spot there. Like, I don't know, and then the house was all up and like this and I took a few meds", he explains.

"Oh god, Gamzee! You know you can, uh, g-get in trouble for beating someone up i-in a library!" I whimper. I don't want this to be real.

"Yeah, but he deserved it", Gamzee says grinning widely and I shudder. He's really creeping me out by now.

"Oh Gamzee. H-how many pills did you take anyways?" I ask, afraid to know the answer.

"Dunno. Probably five or six of those motherfuckers", he answers and I look at him, terrified.

"G-gamzee! H-how c-could you?" I manage to say.

"I don't know. I'm still all up and standin' so nothin' to worry 'bout there", he says with a wicked smile.

"Oh my", I whisper to myself and wheel over to my bed. I can feel Gamzee's eyes on my back, but don't dare look around yet. I climb onto the bed and finally look at Gamzee. "Come h-here."

He immediately obeys me, walking over to the bed and crawling next to me. I pull him closer and hug him tight, hiding my face in his unruly black hair.

"I'll get your new meds today. Just don't, uh, go out anymore, okay?" I ask, loosening my grip and he nods, staying quiet. I pull his face up to see tears in his eyes.

"Don't cry. Everything will turn out alright", I say with a smile and gently kiss away his tears. He's sort of curled up next to me now and I just stroke his hair soothingly, not really knowing what else to do either.

I've never seen Gamzee crying before, but I guess there's a first time for everything. He's practically shaking in my hands as I continue to pet him.

"Just let it out", I whisper and he finally breaks, sobs wracking through his body. He's shaking violently now and I can feel the tears soak through the spot on my shirt his face is pressed against. That spot will most likely be covered in makeup soon, but at the moment I have way more important things to be thinking about.

I keep stroking Gamzee's hair for almost ten minutes before he calms down and collects himself.

"I'm motherfucking sorry Tav. I don' know what got into me", he says, wiping some of his tears away.

"I don't either, but I'll go get your meds today, okay?" I say and he nods slightly.

"I'm so sorry", he repeats and I stroke his hair a few more times.

"I think you should, um, try to get some sleep if you really, uh, took so many pills", I say and he groans.

"Probably a good motherfucking idea", he says suddenly sounding very tired and I smile.

"Just lie down here in my bed and I'll get the meds", I say moving a few inches but he stops me. I look at him quizzically and he kisses me.

"You're the best motherfucking guy anyone could wish for", he says and I smile, pushing him down gently.

"Get some sleep", I order and get into my wheelchair. I glance at him to make sure he really is going to sleep before leaving the room and heading for the door. I'll probably have to take the bus.


	45. Chapter 45

**Five chapters again. That's it for tonight. Enjoy this burst of 10 chapters in two days, cause it won't be happening again any time soon.**

I wake up before Tavros comes back. Well that wasn't a long nap. Stretching I sit up and look around, rubbing my eyes tiredly.

The room is as messy as I left it. Clothes are all over the place and drawers are open. I frown and get up, looking down. My shirt is ripped in few places and with a sigh I pull it off, throwing it on the floor with the other stuff.

I walk over to the drawers and pick up two halves of a paper. I feel a sting in my heart as I place them on the table next to each other to identify what is drawn on them.

It's the picture Tavros drew of the two of us, sitting side by side on a hill. The first one he drew of us.

I step a few steps backwards and bend over, pulling at my hair. After a few minutes I get back up and look around again. Better clean up a bit. Tav would probably appreciate that.

I do just that and start cleaning the room, putting away clothes, collecting broken objects into one pile and putting away all the other stuff I've thrown out in my rage. Luckily the broken objects pile isn't too big. Only a few clothes and a candle. Why do we even have a candle in our room?

I sigh and walk out of there to the living room. The cushions of our brownish couch are nowhere to be seen, probably in the kitchen, and I can see at least one lamp has fallen of its table. The couch has scratches and it looks like the curtains are ripped off, broken into more than two halves. The TV looks like it's mostly unharmed, but the same can't be said about the small table in the middle of the room. It has scratches all over it and I can't say for certain it can be fixed.

Another deep inhale and I start cleaning up this room. By the time I've finished I've gotten really hungry. I'm guessing the last time I ate was in the morning, before my fight with Dave. Better grab some food then.

I go empty the fridge of everything needed for a few sandwiches and start making a pile. By the time I feel like there's enough I've already made around six of those motherfuckers. With a grin I take the plate and sit down at the table, starting to munch on my little snack.

I finish over half of the sandwiches before Tav comes back.

"Hiya best motherfucking boyfriend", I say with a smile even though he can't see me yet.

"Oh, you're up already?" he questions as he emerges into the kitchen.

"Hell yeah. Got my wicked cleaning on with our apartment", I explain finishing my second to last sandwich.

"You cleaned up? That's great!" Tavros says with a smile and stops next to me. "Here, these are your new meds. I doubt you should take them today, though, since you already ate five of your other pills, but you should probably put them somewhere you'll remember them."

I take the bottle of pills and stare at it for a second, reading the label lazily.

"Yeah, I will", I promise and put the pills down, continuing to eat my sandwiches.

"I also think you should skip work tomorrow. Test the new meds and see what they do to you, and probably rest for a bit too. And stay inside mostly", Tavros says blushing lightly. Motherfucker must not be comfortable with ordering others around.

"Sounds like a motherfucking plan", I say with a low chuckle and eat the rest of my meal in a few bites.

Tavros goes to what I expect is our room. He leaves the kitchen anyways, saying he needs to do some homework. I smile and let him go. No need to hold him here, is there? I sit around for a while and sigh, closing my eyes. Maybe I should go put the pills somewhere. Not anywhere just anyone can see them from, but to the bathroom, maybe. They really look like very strong pills, and to be honest I don't want to try them.

I force myself up and grab the bottle of pills. Still a bit dazed by my overdose earlier I lean on the wall for a few seconds, wondering why the dizziness is starting this late. I push that thought out of mind and walk to the bathroom slower than usual, putting the pills in the cabinet on the wall. I look at the colorful collection of pills before closing the cabinet and walking to my room.

I fall onto the bed and stare at Tav as he works. He glances at me, gives me a smile and continues his work. I turn onto my back, staring at the roof and close my eyes.

I wake up to an empty apartment. I pull myself into a sitting position and look around. Tav isn't in the bedroom, and it's already so late he must have left for school by now. I gently rub my eyes before getting up and grabbing a shirt. I'm still shirtless from yesterday, though I didn't really notice that for some reason while I was cleaning.

I drag my lazy ass into the kitchen and notice a note on the fridge. It's from Tav and he says he has already called Kanaya to tell I'm not coming to work today. A smile tugs at my tired lips. He's always watching out for me.

I get some cereal and a coffee for breakfast and try to remember what I'm supposed to do next. God my head hurts. I rub at my temples and wonder if it really is a good idea to try those pills. I decide to go for it even though I hate the thought they might make me act weird. Well probably they'd make me better than without pills at all. Or bad pills.

I sigh and get up, walking to the bathroom. I apply my make-up, since I'm not sure if I can concentrate after downing the stupid white meds.

I stare at my image in the mirror before finally getting on with it and dig out the new medicine bottle from the cabinet. I pop out one medicine like the doctor had ordered me to do earlier and put the bottle back. A deep inhale and I put the pill in my mouth, downing it with some water.

First thing I notice is that the pill tastes horrible. Next up I feel my head lighten a bit. The headache eases too. I smirk at myself from the mirror. Maybe this won't be too bad.

Feeling a lot lighter I walk out of the bathroom and fetch a hoodie to put on before grabbing my keys and going out. Tav told me not to go out but I want fresh air so desperately for some reason.

I get out of the apartment and a cold wind blows on my face. I smile and start walking in a random direction. No worries now. Just all the small miracles of life around me and my feet to carry me where ever the little motherfuckers want me to go.

A small whimper catches my attention as I'm walking past a house.

"Stay out you dirty stray!" a woman yells slamming the door in the face of a shaggy looking dog. I stop and tilt my head, watching the dog back away and turn around. It stops in its tracks.

The two of us stare at each other for a few seconds, but the dog doesn't do anything. I kneel down to its level and smile.

"Hey there bro. You hungry?" I ask and the dog tilts its head, obviously wondering whether or not to trust me.

"Come here, we'll get you some food. I won't hurt you", I say gently and the dog takes a few steps towards me.

"That's a good boy", I say, calling the dog all the way over to me. I let it sniff my hand and scratch it gently. When the dog starts following me I smile.

"Come on, let's get you home", I say with a smile and start walking towards my apartment with the stray dog on my heels.


	46. Chapter 46

**Argh, this was the chapter I missed and I don't see how I could ;_;**

**Guys I'm so sorry, I went through all the files to see which one was wrong to get this to you and now luckily all I have to do is put it where it belongs. And hope I don't have it somewhere with another chapter that is.**

I get back from school and the first thing I find behind the apartment door is a small dog. It jumps up from where it was sleeping and dashes deeper into the house.

"What?" I ask, surprised, and stare after the dog. I close the door and wheel deeper into the house, trying to figure out if I actually just saw a dog.

"That you, Tav?" I hear Gamzee ask from the bedroom and decide to go there.

"Yeah, I thought I just saw a dog in our apart-" I stop mid-sentence to stare at the dog shivering behind Gamzee's legs and he picks it up.

"I found this motherfucker on the street! He was kicked out of a house and he was all up and being nice to me so I thought why not. You wanted a dog anyways, so I got one for motherfucking free", Gamzee says, apparently feeling quiet cheerful.

"Did you take your meds?" I ask and he laughs at me.

"Yes, they're fan-fucking-tastic I tell you. Don't feel like Godzilla anymore. No need to tear down the whole city", he says chuckling and I frown. "Something wrong?"

"Uh, no. I just, got the impression you don't like dogs. They always, um, seem to hate you, so.." I am at a loss for words, not sure what to really say or do.

"Oh, no, I love animals! They're the cutest shit right after you", he says and I can feel the blush creeping onto my face. "So all we need to do is take this here fur ball to the vet to get him all up and checked and buy some stuff for him."

"And name him", I say and Gamzee smiles.

"We're keeping him?" he asks excitedly and I smile.

"Well we can't just, um, throw him out either, now can we?", I say and he puts the dog down, rushing over to hug me.

"That's all sorts of miraculous!" he says with a grin and kisses me quickly before walking slowly back to the dog and crouching down next to it. "What should we call you, little fellow?"

The dog barks at him once and he shooshes it with a smile.

"No barking here, bro", he says and the dog wags its tail. It suddenly notices the tail and starts chasing it, becoming one blurry ball of spinning white and brown fur.

We both laugh at the dog and it stops, tilting it's head at us. It then realizes I'm there and approaches me slowly, sniffing at my chair and then at my leg. I lean down and give my hand for it to sniff before stroking its back. The dog licks my hand gently before trotting over to Gamzee and jumping up against his leg.

"Fine, fine, I'll pick you up", he says with a wide smile as he picks up the dog.

"I think we should go buy stuff for it after we've eaten something", I say and Gamzee nods, scratching the dog in his arms.

"Yeah, sounds like a good motherfucking idea", he says sitting down on his bed.

"But I should do some homework. Would you, um, mind making some food?" I ask and he nods.

"In a sec'", he says laying back and dragging the dog on top of himself. The dog wags its tail and licks at Gamzee's face paint.

"How did you get it to, uhh, like you so much?" I ask as I go to get my school bag.

"I don't motherfucking know. I just called him over and he fucking came with me all the way here. Promised him some food and he was more than willing", he answers. I just chuckle slightly. I knew all the dogs couldn't hate him. I just knew it.

Later that day, after I had done my homework and eaten the food Gamzee made for us, we were driving towards the pet store. I used to visit there a lot, but it stopped after my accident. The white dog in the back is jumping around, looking out the windows and I gently pull it onto my lap to try and calm it down.

"No worries, we'll get you some brand new stuff soon!" I say with a smile on my face and the dog barks at me.

The trip doesn't last long and soon we're out of the car. I have to keep the dog on my lap since it seems to want to just run off in a random direction.

"It seems motherfucking excited", Gamzee says pushing me into the store and the two of us start going around, searching for anything and everything the dog might need.

After going through the whole store the two of us end up buying a new collar, a leash, food, brushes, toys, bowls and shampoos. After paying I immediately put the new collar and leash on and hand them to Gamzee.

"Where to next?" he asks after helping me into the car with the dog.

"Um, I think we should go get him checked. So, to the vet, I guess", I answer and he grins.

"To the motherfucking vet it is!" he says and I giggle.

Fairly quickly the two of us have got the vet trip out the way. My new dog didn't have any diseases, nor did he have a microchip either. We got him a microchip and got him checked for the basics. We dropped off all the items at our house and took the dog to the park.

Soon I will be able to walk him around. Or at least as soon as Equius gets the legs done. Then I will be able to walk him around and take him to parks all by myself.

I smile at the thought, but right now I'm happy as it is, with everything seeming to finally go back to normal.


	47. Chapter 47

**Okay, nearing the end here guys. And then we'll finally move on from this story to the next.**

I wake up the next morning not to my alarm clock, but to something licking my face.

"Down", I snap and the dog flinches away from me. I sit up and rub my eyes, looking down at the dog. It's cowering away from me and jumps onto Tavros's bed.

"Shit", I mutter as I get up and walk to the bathroom. I grab the white medicine bottle from the front and down one pill, leaning my head against the cool mirror. After I feel slightly more cheerful I walk out of the bathroom and head back to my bedroom, kneeling besides Tavros's bed. He hasn't woken yet, even though the little dog is nuzzled right next to him.

"Want some motherfucking breakfast?" I ask, smiling and it starts waving its tail. "Come on."

I put some food for the dog and make coffee for myself, plopping down on the couch. I look around the room and start thinking. What could I call the dog? It had to have a name. The mostly white animal approaches me and jumps up onto the couch.

"What should your name be, motherfucker?" I ask. The dog merely wags its tail and I chuckle.

"I think, uh, Peanut would be nice", I hear Tavros say and look over my shoulder to see he's up too. "He has brown paws and ears."

"Yeah, sounds great", I say watching the dog- I mean Peanut. "Wonder how long it will take for him to learn his new name?"

"Depends how much we use it, I guess", Tavros says wheeling to the kitchen. I lean back on the couch lazily scratching peanut.

"So your name is Peanut. Ain't that motherfucking cute", I say and he looks up at me. It almost looks like he's smiling. "Too bad you'll have to all up and be alone here today. Don't break anything like I did."

Peanut jumps off the couch and soon brings me a ball, wagging his tail.

"Want to play?" I ask and smile. I throw the ball towards my room and Peanut chases after it. I hear the padding of his foots as he races back to me and jumps onto the couch, excited to get to play something.

Soon though Peanut gets bored and starts whining by the front door.

"Just a sec", I say getting up and stretching. I get myself black jeans, a purple T-shirt and an almost black hoodie and put my phone in my pocket.

"I'll take Peanut for a walk", I say to Tavros while passing the kitchen and he nods.

"Have fun!" he shouts as I click the leash on and leave the apartment.

"Where should we go?" I question mostly to myself and glance both ways of the street before deciding I might as well just follow Peanut where he wanted. I end up walking towards Karkat's place as Peanut jump around, a bit irritated by the leash, but excited anyways, sniffing at anything and everything.

"Wanna visit Karkles?" I ask with a grin on my face and Peanut glances at me. He doesn't really seem to care for it, but I might as well show my new friend to my best friend. A real friend meeting!

I lead Peanut to the apartment and even as he hesitates, he obediently follows me in. What gets him to trust me so much in one day is a total mystery to me, but I don't mind.

Karkat opens the door soon after I knock eyes red and puffy.

"What the fuck do you want?" he growls and I chuckle.

"Just checking if you're up yet", I answer and tighten my grip on the leash as Peanut tries to get closer to my short friend.

"And what the fuck is that?" Karkat inquires and I look down, grin widening.

"This is Peanut. I found him yesterday and we up and kept him with Tavbro", I say, smiling from ear to ear.

"You'll break your face in half. Come in", he says and walks in. I follow him and close the door behind me, letting Peanut off the leash to look around the small apartment.

"Why are you up so motherfucking early?" I ask as I follow Karkat into his bedroom.

"Take a shot", he says gritting his teeth together as he sits in front of his computer, where he apparently was before I came.

"Watching some bitchtits movies again?" I ask and he nods. I flop down on his bed and stare at his back.

"Why did you even fucking come here?" he asks and I tilt my head.

"Don't know. Peanut dragged me this way and I thought I might as well visit", I give my pretty bad explanation.

"So your dog brought you here?" Karkat asks glancing at me and I smile.

"Sort of yeah", I say and get up. "I think I'll leave now, though. I still have my motherfucking job to do."

"Yeah, go ahead. You still going to pick me up later?" he asks and I pat his shoulder.

"Always will", I say and find Peanut, walking him back home.

I come back from work rather happy. Nothing went wrong and it seems like my new meds are working well. Apart from making me a bit drowsy they kept me calm and friendly to all. Kanaya even noticed my change in behavior.

With Peanut at my heels all the time cooking was a bit harder, but I managed to make food for both me and Tavros and it wasn't even that bad. I put the left overs in the fridge and proceed to watch TV with Tav for around an hour.

"I think I'll, uh, take a shower", Tavros says after checking the time. I help him into his wheelchair and he goes to the shower, leaving me with Peanut on the couch.

I was just grabbing for the remote when Tavros's phone starts ringing on the table besides it. I pick it up and check the caller ID.

"Equius, huh?" I say and ponder on answering it. I finally press the green button. "Gamzee."

"Is Tavros there?" Equius asks, sounding a bit surprised.

"He's in the motherfucking shower at the moment", I say leaning back on the couch.

"Oh, all right. Could you tell him I have his legs ready on Friday?" Equius asks and I fall silent.

"What legs?" I ask carefully, straightening my back.

"He ordered prosthetic legs from me, and I promised to make them. I got them ready in record time", Equius explains.

"Yeah, okay, I'll all up and tell him", I say.

"That would be excellent. Thank you", Equius says sounding a bit strained.

"Bye motherfucker", I say and after Equius says good bye, end the call.

Tavros hadn't told me anything about prosthetics.


	48. Chapter 48

**Chapter 47. We're two chapters from the end. We can do this!**

After drying myself I put on clean boxers and a t-shirt and go to the living room to find Gamzee waiting for me.

"Got something to all up and be telling me about?" he asks and I halt in the doorway. His tone of voice is rather frightening.

"W-what do you mean?" I ask.

"You got a call while you were all up and getting your clean on. I checked who it was and answered. Wanna take a motherfucking guess?" he asks a small smile tugging at his lips.

"Uh, Vriska?" I suggest. I wasn't expecting a call.

"Nah, I wouldn't have answered that bitch", he says, leaning back on the couch and inviting me over. I wheel there and he helps me onto the couch, grabbing hold of my hand.

"Then, uh, who was it?" I ask and he smiles.

"It was motherfucking Equius."

My heart jumps to my throat and I can't think of a thing to say. I open my mouth a few times before finally finding my voice.

"W-what did he, um, want?" I don't even need to ask. I already know.

"He said your legs will be ready on Friday", Gamzee says smile faltering a bit.

An awkward silence falls into the living room and we stare at each other. Gamzee seems to be waiting for me to say something, but I'm having a really hard time coming up with anything. Finally I let my gaze drop down to my hand, still in his.

"I-i'm sorry, for not telling you", I say, voice a bit strained. "I wanted it to be, uh, a surprise. And I didn't think they, um, would be ready this quickly."

"I's no problem", he says and my eyes dart up to meet his almost purple ones.

"Y-yes it is. I s-should have told you, uh, the day I ordered them", I say chewing at my lower lip.

"Seriously, it's not like it's my business anyways. Great you can finally walk again!" he says grinning widely and I stare at him mouth slightly open.

"So I was wondering how much they motherfucking cost you", he says after a short silence and I shake my head.

"It's not that much. I've got the money saved", I say and he chuckles.

"I can pay half", he says and I shake my head again.

"No. I'm not letting you do that", I say and he frowns.

"Aww, why not? Can't I help my boyfriend out?" he asks and I sigh.

"Gamzee, I'm paying for them. That's, uh, final."

Gamzee frowns a bit but agrees with it.

"When are you gonna get to walk with them?" he asks.

"I don't really know. Um, maybe after the surgery", I say. Maybe that wasn't the best thing to say. Gamzee's expression turns worried the instant the words have slipped out of my mouth.

"You have to go through a surgery?" he asks, horror leaking into his voice.

"Uh, yeah. The legs, uh, can't be used otherwise. I'll try to get the time, um, this weekend", I say and squeeze Gamzee's hand. "It'll be just fine."

Gamzee stares at me for a bit before a small smile finally forms on his lips.

"So you're gonna go to a surgery this weekend", he starts.

"If I get the, uh, time. And then it'll take some, uh, time to get used to the legs", I say and he smiles.

"We'll get through this! We motherfucking will!" he says with an ear-to-ear grin on his face that makes me giggle.

I'm about to say something else but he interrupts me by leaning in for a kiss. I smile and return the kiss, leaning in a bit.

Suddenly I feel his cold fingers under my shirt and gasp. He takes the opportunity to slip his tongue into my mouth and I shiver. Why's he so eager all of a sudden?

He pushes me back down on the couch, getting on top of me and slowly pulling my shirt up. He pulls it all the way off and starts sucking and biting at my neck, making I shiver.

Then I get it. He's scared. Scared of losing me. I smile as another shiver racks through my body. Maybe I'll let him do it, just this once.

**Also, if anyone wants to read this following part I will be uploading it as a seperate story, Just the two of us. I will be keeping to my promise of only one rated M scene in this story.**


	49. Chapter 49

**Oh my gosh I just realized I have skipped one chapter and I don't know which one! D:**

**I'll have to fix this error as soon as possible.**

**So this is the final chapter, chapter 49 of Please Don't Leave Me.**

It's Saturday already. I can't help but be anxious about what's going to happen today. Tav got his appointment to the doctor's and I seriously hope he's going to make it. Not like I don't trust the doctors, it's just that I'm not completely sure about them. They could have saved my mom.

I've been awake for the better part of an hour now. And it's only 8 in the morning. I sigh and take a sip out of my coffee. Nothing better to do, I guess.

After drinking my coffee and sitting there like an asshole for almost another hour I get up and start bustling around the kitchen. Nervous and anxious I make breakfast for Tavros, doing my best with the tee. I finish his breakfast a little past nine and as much as I'd like to let him sleep I know I have to wake him up.

I walk with a tray to his room and put it down on the table. I sit down on his bed and gently nudge his shoulder.

"Hey Tav, wake up", I mutter and he groans.

"What time is it?" he asks, too sleepy to even stutter.

"It's a bit past nine", I answer and pick up the tray. "Brought you some motherfucking breakfast."

He sits up rubbing his eyes and takes the tray from me. I kiss him on the forehead before getting up and walking about, putting stuff out of place just to return to it minutes later and put it back. Not sure what the hell I'm doing I walk to the bathroom and put on my make-up. I stare at my image until I hear Tavros get into his wheelchair and immediately rush to him, taking the tray and dishes and putting them away.

He goes to sit on the couch and I soon follow, sitting down next to him and pulling him into my arms. After a nice little silence he sighs and looks at me.

"Gamzee, trust me, I'm not going to die", he says calmly, smiling at me.

"I know", I say and smile back, maybe a bit sad.

"Then you don't, uh, need to act like it's my last day", he notes and I chuckle.

"Sorry. I just don't want you to motherfucking leave me like mom did", I say and he shakes his head.

"I won't", he says, even though I haven't even told him about my mom. Only briefly have I mentioned her dyeing when I was young, but never have I told the details.

Despite this I smile and hug him closer to my chest, never wanting to let go.

The time goes by too quickly and sooner than I would have wanted I'm parking my car in front of the hospital. I help Tav out of the car and into his wheelchair and accompany him all the way in the hospital.

Everything seems to have lost meaning. The hospital is painfully familiar and I force myself not to think about my mother, instead concentrating on Tavros.

I don't catch a word he says with the nurses, but he is soon led away from me and they tell me I have to wait in the hall.

The minutes feel like hours to me as I pace up and down the corridor in front of the room Tavros was put in. When they finally come out Tavros is in some sort of hospital garments, pushed off in his wheelchair.

I follow him as far as they let me go before his hand slips from mine.

"I love you", he says with a confident smile on his face and I sigh.

I exit the hospital and walk to my car, opening the door and sitting in the driver's seat. I glance at Tavros's seat and notice two pieces of paper on it. I grab them and start reading the letter.

I know you will worry no matter what, but I won't be leaving yet. Sooner than you know it we will be walking around town with Peanut and having a great time!

Just try to hold on and don't let anything get you down, okay? Do that for me.

I love you, no matter what.

-Tavros

I read the note written in lovely handwriting over and over again, wondering when he had time to put it there and glance at the other paper.

It is the picture of me and Tavros kissing. The one he told his feelings with.

I grip the papers tighter in my hands and let my gaze drop on the front doors of the hospital.

"Please, don't leave me."


	50. Chapter 50

For those who don't feel like re-reading the story _once again_ the chapter I messed up at is chapter 46. I edited it so all the chapters are now in the right places.

**Author's Note**

Okay, first of all I want to say thank you for reading my story, and thank you to those who read it twice. I have no idea if anyone actually read it twice, but oh well. The first story got over 70 followers, 60 favourites and 180 comments, and if we add everything from the second round it would make around _100_ followers, _80_ favourites and _200_ comments! Gosh guys, I'm at a loss of words here. And it's only my first fic ever about anything. As an added bonus we got 50 chapters in two ways. 50 chapters of the actual story if you count in the second rated M chapter and 50 chapters without including that and including this author's note. Golly!

Also, I am so sorry for the delay on the sequel! I really am! I promised it would appear like three weeks ago and then I had to delete this story and I really didn't want to and had to edit the whole 145 pages I have of it and argh, it was really frustrating. Anyways, I'm going to upload the sequel on Monday, no exceptions. Unless I get it out today or tomorrow, that is. Ideas for the plot, I'd always love to hear them.

In this version of the story I corrected all the errors microsoft office word and I could find and hopefully they are mostly gone. There were some weird parts like _I walked to the room of my door_ or _felt his hands under my skin_ but those were taken care of as well.

I actually had some funny moments while editing it too, since I used a sort of auto-change feature that changed all the "you"s to "I"s, all the "ir"s to "my" and so on, and ended up having to edit out stupid spelling errors like _wheelchamy_ or _hamy_ or stuff like that.

I'd also be more than happy to write you guys one-shots of different OTP's, that would be nice. In other words I'm taking requests for stories and possibly writing them. Don't worry, I like almost all ships ;)

To end this off I thank you a hundred more times about things I can not even start to name. You're all very precious to me and your nice comments kept me going to the very end. Thank you for reading Please Don't Leave Me and hope to see you in the sequel!

**~The Golden Prince**


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